I'm a 20 year old virgin , am i pathetic and worthless ?

Question

I feel so pathetic for asking this but i don't know what to do .

I'm a 20 year old virgin who hasn't even found the one yet

Thoughout my young teenage life, I was alway told by my parents to have sex with the right one you love. But, in school kids bragged and made me feel bad. they view me like I nothing Because I didn't just have sex with some girl..

Well now im depress and i feel pathetic. I knew kids and friend who had sex at the age of 12 to 15. My best friend told me that he was proud he has sex at the age of 13, hes happy he has sex so young because it was exciting and great to experience that at a young age (or something like that).

For some reason, I regret waiting this long just to find the right girl to have sex with. I wanted to experience sex at a young age too, but with the one im going to be with for the rest of my life. but now i fear that im going

do you think im pathetic, and do you think i should just give up and have sex with a random girl.

Answer 1

I think you should be proud to still be a virgin at 20. Just look around at how many unwanted babies there are in the world, not to mention AIDS and many other STD's.
There are a lot of kids sleeping around at 12-13 yo and I think that is so wrong. OK they may be physically able to but they are not emotionally ready. You should wait till you find the right girl and wait till YOU are ready and not when someone thinks you are ready.
Yes sex is great but it can also cause many problems both psychically and emotinaly. Do you really want to loose it to some $2 hooker and then regret it for the rest of your life?
Save it till you feel the time is right and don't listen to those that just sleep around.

Answer 2

I am 20 yrs. old, going to 21 next month and I still have never had a boyfriend. In my opinion you don't even really seem to care about whether or not that you have/had a girlfirend before, because you actually want one. You just want to have a girlfriend because most other people our age have already been around. I won't lie to you and say that I'm not bothered by the fact that I haven't ever been on a date before. It's just that you have already given up before you even tried, saying that you already know that they're going to reject you. Sometimes your attitude of yourself reflects onto others, if you think that your worthless other people will think that there's something wrong with you. I'm not saying any of this to be mean to you or anything, I'm just telling you what I think is the truth. I apologize if I sound rude and if I hurt your feelings in any way. But you have to learn that is there nothing wrong with you at all everyone is different and everyone sees eachother differently. Who knows you may even meet someone that you like? I'm not saying that you will, I am just saying that there is always a chance.

Answer 3

Ha your friends sound pathetic and worthless. I think you sound fine. You'd be surprised how many people out there are virgins at your age - a lot of my girl friends are. And a lot of people thought I wasn't, when I still was, so you can never trust what people say, guys always brag about it, and there is nothing special about having sex so young, it's usually crap anyway and a lot of them regret it. I would say wait unless you find a nice girl. Doesn't have to be the ONE, because I do think waiting around for that is silly because you could be missing out on a lot of fun and experien, not to mention suppressing natural urges and getting frustrated, but doesn't have to be a random either.

BTW, I agree with Pam. There is a risk that if you wait, you will end up married and only ever tried one girl and end up cheating. Not cool.

Answer 4

The other guys are studs and will have sex with anyone who wears a skirt. To me this is pathetic. I am not suggesting that you should keep from having sex until you are 25 or so but try to find someone that you really like before you take the plunge. Having sex merely to wet your whistle is considered manly but in reality it isn't very romantic. I would rather masturbate than have sex with a girl that I didn't really like. OK let's say you had sex with someone and then couldn't wait to get the heck out of there after it was done. This gives you a crappy feeling and the sex part becomes unimportant. Hang in there for awhile.

Answer 5

No you are not pathetic. There is nothing wrong with wanting to have sex with the right person but I do think it is important for everyone to go through a casual sex phase. Some people do meet the love of their life and only have sex with that one person but most people have sex with more than one person throughout their life. I would get it out of my system now while you are young otherwise you may end up regretting it later after you are married and be tempted to cheat (not a good thing). But most of all, do what is right for you. Some people can have casual sex with no problem but for others it feels cheap and empty. If you are in the latter category, don't beat yourself up. That is what feels comfortable for you and other people are jerks if they make you feel pathetic over it.

Answer 6

Dude, I understand what you going through I'm 20 going on 21 soon. I haven't had sex yet either and everyday I think about it. It's normal to have doubt and just so you know my brother is 22 he's a virgin, I have a friend at work who is 23 he's a virgin and my cuz who is 18 is also a virgin and they all have doubts don't worry about it. Oh and also people that say sex is just sex have low moral values.

Answer 7

well i would follow your parents, and i wouldnt get depressed over sex, because once the first time happens its over and the second its like a been there done that type thing, and do not have sex with a random girl because u might catch somthing from her, or maybe have a baby, and if your that desperate u could always masturbate, it may have been for u that the one u gave your virginity to is going to be the one u r with till the rest of your life, dont sweat it

Answer 8

I think your parents are correct. Your friends are young and immature. Having sex without love is meaningless and the great feeling they claim to have does not last. The physical pleasure goes away but the personal feelings do not. You need to wait for a good relationship with someone you hope to spend your life with rather than a random girl. You are not pathetic and the boys who brag about their conquests are childish and don't respect women or themselves.

Answer 9

If you hold out for the perfect/right girl you might not have sex until you're like 35-40 yrs old.....do it now get it over with that way when you do meet the girl of your dreams you'll have some experience under your belt.

I had sex for the first time when I was 21 and wished it would have happened sooner.

Virginity and saving yourself is just emotional bullsh*t.....we are made to value that instead of just realizing that sex is just sex....it feels good, but people (especially women) don't seem to seperate two different things that are sex and love.....you can have both, but one is not required to enjoy the other.

Answer 10

It is pathetic to have sex too early because of peer pressure. You are strong enough to resist the easy but menaingless sex your friends bragged about, and you should be proud of that, not ashamed. Sex with the right person is amazing -- well worth waiting for!