how do I stay strong?

Question

ex was trying to stay in contact thur email and he has a girl friend. I told him do not email me again. He wanted the divorce, he got it. Leave me alone. Hardest thing I've ever had to do as I love him.

Answer 1

Too bad for your ex---ex-cellent for you!
You stay strong by remembering you deserve better when you start to weaken.
Remember that sometimes we "invent" our lovers...we vest them with qualities they don't really have, because they "must" be just like us in the way we think because we have so much fun with them.
Remember, also, that some men like to keep you around in case they ever need you, and those kind are excellent at trying to exploit every desire they happen to know you have.
I sense a strength in you, from your dignified request that he stop contacting you. It will be hard, but that strength will carry you through.
Psychiatrists say we will not do anything that is against our own self-image. If you see yourself as the kind of woman who would only stay with and love a winner, that loss will fade.
Stay strong.

Answer 2

If you told him to leave you alone, then you are strong. Hurray! for you. He has a bad case of; the grass isn't greener on the other side. Change your email address. Which it really isn't fair that you have to do that. When he write you, don't write back. When he calls, hang up. I know this sound easier than it really is, simply because you love him.He knows that you still love him. Just don't put yourself in the position of being the OTHER woman. I bet she doesn't know he's still contacting you. It is easy to fall prey of that,because of the love you feel for him, put him in his place and never return a call or email. He'll began to wonder what is wrong with you, have you found someone else and so on. You are strong. You know enough that you are tried of him bothering you and you just want to get over it, now let him get over it.

Answer 3

Cut off all contact with him. That is one of the most important ways to get over an ex. Since he is trying to email you, try putting him on your email's "blocked list".

Also, focus more on you. Have any hobbies? Like to go out with friends? If so, concentrate on those things that make YOU happy...

Answer 4

yes, it is hard, when you have to accept the facts, and move on, when you loved/love someone, men seem to want to hang on, even if they were the ones first wanting the divorce. i suggest not staying in contact, maybe years down the road, the random email, but for now, you need to heal and get on
i went threw the same with my ex, and yes he had the new girl friend, maybe its a control thing with them, wanting to keep the ex's hanging on, i am not sure what it is, i just am thankfull i didnt fall for it,
if you need a boost to help you stay strong, just think of him and his new girl friend, in bed! that will do it, did for me!!

Answer 5

It will be hard but you will live. Change your house around put your new stuff around you. Get a new email account. Meet new people, do and see new things. Make changes for yourself that you were not able to do before because of your marriage. Move on and do not look back.

Answer 6

Get a new email account close the old 1 down and dont give it to him like you said he made his choice now he needs to realise he cant have his cake and eat it too even if its just friendship he wants.

If you have children then speak nicely in front of them but do it with a little sarcasm that they wont pick up on and he will , never argue in front of them .

Answer 7

Ask him if his new girlfriend would appreciate his still trying to contact you? Maybe she could make him stop hint hint:) Chances are he is pursuing you because he senses your weakness for him still. Or maybe the bloom is starting to fade from the new relationship either way GET TOUGH his game playing is disrespectful to both you women. Love yourself enough to tell him he's not good enough for you and learn to believe it. Once you respect and love yourself you are more likely to attract a truly respectful and loving man to share your life with. Screw the high school drama wait for an adult.

Answer 8

it sounds like your ex is having regret for asking you for a divorce. just give it some time he will eventually get the point that your not gonna take him back. although if there is any kids involved it might be good to stay on speaking terms or try getting counseling to work out any remaining issues there is.

Answer 9

seems like you havent moved on from him. that in some way, you still feel attached to him by your love for him. times like these, you have to be strong, not only for yourself, but for people who love you. they don't want to see you hurt. i don't think your ex wants to end of band terms with you. i think he's using this contacting you as a way of doing that. i think that if you found yourself someone else, it may make you stronger. however, if you don't, it will make it all that much harder as there could possibly be times where he'd want you back, and you'd be in that state that you'd go back to him because perhaps he's the only person you've ever loved this way.

Answer 10

Well, sounds like he wants his cake and eat it to. He cannot have both. Sure, you will still have feelings for him for awhile, my best suggestion is finding yourself again. Don't even give him the satisfaction. He deserves nothing from you. Plan a trip or try something new you have never tried before but always wanted to. Just find yourself again.