My husband and I disagree. I have finished grad school, have a great job/career, no bills, beautiful car and we own a condo. He is finishing school shortly, starting a career, has a great car, two kids (previous marriage) and owns the condo, too.
He thinks I am "giving up" because I don't have any more major desires in life. He wants to get a house and go for more things, but, since we aren't having kids, I am happy and content and love our space and freedom.
Should I have more goals?
2007-08-25 14:18:18 · 22 answers · asked by Love2Laugh 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Everyone has different goals for their life. Did you discuss these things before marriage? Maybe you will both have to compromise and find a happy medium. Good luck and congratulations on all the goals that you have achieved. I'm sure it was a lot of hard work.
2007-08-25 14:24:47 · answer #1 · answered by conni 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sound too good to be true and too young to be content. What did he promise you? Did you both decide not to have kids? Did you both discuss that you are content? Is he trying to set the kids up for a great future (because I bet you, he is).
You have a family with him and a condo is good enough to will to your kids. You do not have to strive for more, work more, etc. to get a house if you don't want one. If he wants to take it to the next level, then let him make the house and everything else happen. Support him when he does and watch how your new goals seem like fun, again. By the way, talk about kids to him because you two need to have some of your own (I know I am stepping way out on that one, but trust me on this one).
2007-08-25 21:37:38 · answer #2 · answered by LaraLara 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sound content and that's great but if he's not then you're not quite "set" yet. I'm sure you have other goals in life (travel, hobbies, career movement) If you really have no other goals then maybe you should switch the focus to helping him achieve what he wants as well. You should both be working towards the bigger picture and what you want as a couple . So he wants a house and you're happy with a condo, welcome to compromise. Keep an open mind. You've done the condo thing and had it your way, maybe try his way and you'll continue to be happy. Good luck :)
2007-08-26 01:21:35 · answer #3 · answered by oracleofohio 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a lot of couples disagree on a lot of things. its seldom to see perfectly matched couples. the point of your husband getting a house is good. owning a house and a condo has a big difference. having a house means having more space and freedom. maybe your husband feels cramped in your condo. in my opinion, having a house is an essential to a family.
2007-08-25 21:38:13 · answer #4 · answered by Nina Mina 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Congrats on your goals. But then again congrats on his. You two have more than most people. He may want more, to provide and set his two children for the future. As things will be harder for them, then it is now for us. I don't think your giving up, I don't even know you. You both have a family when you said I do. What are you giving up? From what I have read, your giving up birth of a child. You need to do what makes you happy, as well as the rest of your family, compromise. More goals, what about a family pet.
2007-08-25 21:28:53 · answer #5 · answered by Babydoll 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well.. that's something you need to think about isn't it? Seems you've done pretty well. but life is just starting for you now. Lucky you.
What is your passion besides work? Travel? learning something new and different. I always wanted to tap dance... I learnt how to do that at age 40! Anything you've always wanted to do but haven't? couldn't? didn't? Now's the time!
Only you know what else you want with your life. You only live it once. Remember that Life is not a dress rehearsal.
2007-08-25 21:33:09 · answer #6 · answered by teritaur 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him you want the two of you to travel and see as many places as possible. This is a goal with no end in sight. You will never run out of places to go to. Have fun...enjoy your life!
2007-08-25 21:38:50 · answer #7 · answered by Kt 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"If it isnt broken , dont fix it".
Do YOU feel like you should have more goals should be the question you ask yourself , does your husband want to get into debt so he can be like the main stream ? .
Seriously if your content and love your home then carry on the way you are maybe put some effort into the romancing between you and your man and tell him thats your new goal to keep the love and intamicy alive between you both, cant see him whingen bout that.
2007-08-25 21:24:17 · answer #8 · answered by JadeyOz 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that is a decision that only you can make not your husband or anyone else. if your are happy and content where you are in life than let it be. if he wants to have more goals and want more than let him go for what he knows and you enough the ride. GodBless
2007-08-25 21:22:49 · answer #9 · answered by Crystal G 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I love your attitude. That is great. Do you need more goals? I say you must not at this time in your life. It could change, but enjoy it like you are! It is like love what you have instead of wanting what you don't have.
2007-08-25 21:34:19 · answer #10 · answered by Dance 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋