Is it okay to lie to your husband? Let me explain.?

Question

My husband is the only one working right now as I quit my job 3 months ago. I have my own personal money saved and have put most of that money in with the household money so my husband would have to support the family alone.

The lie.... there was this pair of killer earrings at the jewerly store that I had to have. They were 1700 buck but on sale for 700. I put them on a charge account that we already have....even though it didn't affect of payments I had to tell my husband that my mom gave them to me because he would have laid a golden cow if he thought that I bought them myself. Should I just let it slide or tell him the truth anyway?

Let me just add that he spends or has spent that much and more many times without talking to me first.

AND I do start back to work next week.

Answer 1

700 dollars for something 99% of people never notice anyway. Are you crazy?

Answer 2

HA! It doesn't affect the payments huh? Are you really that nieve about credit?

Why are you spending money you don't have to begin with? Credit shoudln't be treated like "free money". It isn't - it comes with a big expense - called interest charges.

Those earrings, if you don't pay it off immediately - will end up still costing you about the same as when they weren't on sale, due to credit interest.

If you don't like it when your husband goes off and buys expensive items without consulting you, do you honestly think you are doing your marriage any favors by playing a tit for tat game, and just puting yourselves more in debt than you already are?

So to answer your question, no it isn't ok to lie - because that lie turns into another one, or you think you can geta way with a little bigger one then an even bigger one - until your entire marriage ends up having to be danced around due to "little white lies".

Answer 3

One matter of concern however....Will one lie lead to another? Some people think that a "white lie" is different from a "lie" in general. But when you erase the word "white," isn't it still a lie? I don't lie to my wife. It would betray her trust and hurt her feelings if I did. I'd rather be honest. Telling the truth is always best. Your husband should respect you for it. Because there should be no secrets in a marriage.

Answer 4

Yikes.
You guys have a bigger problem than ear rings. Why the ME ME attitude? If you can't negotiate things, your marriage is dead in the water. He is not your parent and you are not his. Agree on the budget and the debt and how you want to handle extras and blowing money. You don't want to run your marriage this way. Please do not get pregnant.
You deserve each other. Are you two friends and partners planning a future together or two kids who want their own way? Are his feelings important to you or did you marry just for the hell of it? Just wondering.
I am sure you will sort this out. I think you guys just need to negotiate how you spend/save and allocate your money. Credit affects you both. Be careful.

Good luck.

Answer 5

I can not believe you spent $700 on earrings!!!!

But any way I think you BOTH have issues with spending money. My husband and I ALWAYS talk about anything over $100.

You both need to learn how to communicate better.

Answer 6

i do not think it good thing about lie about money.

I do not think if you like something you can hint to your husband and say i saw this earrings that i like at the store. You just point out.

You should not have got it earrings. Doesn't matter if you really wanted the jewelry and buy it.
You should always be honestly your husband.

What happen if your mother does come visit and your husband ask hey the earrings you gift to what your name is really nice.

And if you keep lie to him you would end up would make something else up when you going to buy more jewelry. what happen if you wanted to buy new car you like how are you going to tell your husband. That o i got this from my mom.
I think you should tell your husband.

Lie can hurt relationship.

Answer 7

To me, the bigger issue is spending $700 for something (on an evil credit card no less) while you were unemployed. This is not good judgement. All in all, I do think you were being wrong here, although certainly not in the "divorce" category by itself.


Kent in SD

Answer 8

2 Things, One you should be able to tell him you want the earrings, and if you can afford them you should be able to get them. Two you should'nt lie to him to get the earrings. Would'nt you be pissed if he bought somthing just for him and did'nt tell you. Aside from that, is'nt $700 a little extravagent for earrings. I mean I guess if money is no object,,why not. But oblviously it must be or why would you have to lie.

Answer 9

Hell no,it's not ok.If it's ok to lie about blowing that much money on a pair of ear rings what are the limits?My ex always lied.She would have sex with my friend then,when I found out,she would rationalize it by saying "she didn't tell me because she didn't want to hurt me".If she cared about hurting me,one would think that she would not have boned my buddy(ex-buddy).

Answer 10

You need to take the earrings back. It was completely wrong of you to purchase something for yourself, at that cost, putting it on credit, all without telling your husband. And you lied saying your mom bought them. Your husband is going to very upset and rightfully so.

Good luck!

Answer 11

First of all you just quit your job and had the nerve to buy yourself expensive gift and put them on your charge card ,
tell your husband your mother bought them for you. dont you realaize the bill will reflect on your charge card. You should have never bought them in the first place. You just dug a hole for your self. Tell him period. Busted
Best of luck