What to say to a husband that works all the time and has no patients for myself and his children?

Answer 1

I'd say that he needs to change or you'll leave him.
There is no need for emotional abuse from someone who is supposed to love you and your children.
Talk to him about it.

Answer 2

First he will tell you that he works so much is for you and the children. People that work all of the time are often called workaholics. Usually these are people that are disorganized and don't use their time efficiently. This is a compulsive behavior that has been the reason of many divorces.
You have to be honest with him. Tell him that you have an issue with his schedule and need to talk about it. Between the two of you, decide on a time that you will talk. Don't stop until you get a firm answer. When and where. It is best if you prepare for this prior to meeting. Be as specific as possible with dates, times, how it makes you feel and the impact it is having on the children. Don't use always and never. That will make him defensive and he won't discuss the issue.
You need to ask for what you need. Based on the statement "has no patients for you or the children" more than likely he doesn't have a clue. If you want to spend time together it should be as a family and as a couple. If he makes excuses, takes no responsibility and tries to make you feel guilty, then you have your answer. He is not making his family his number one priority. At this point you will have to make some decisions. Good Communicating....

Answer 3

It depends on what he is doing to exhibit that he has no patience. Is he verbally or physically abusive to you and/or your children? If so, then you must seek help immediately. If it's a matter of him being moody and non-participative in the family union then you can probably work it out.
Perhaps the problem is both of yours. When he gets home from work is it a chaotic household? If so, that might put him in a terrible mood immediately. Take a look at the overall situation on how both of you are running this family. He may be in a job he despises, but has to keep to support his family. It might not be you and the children that brings on his impatience, but rather his work life. I'm sure he's just as frustrated as you. It is extremely important to be the bigger person in this situation and talk to him about this matter. Your marriage is worth it; unless it's an abusive marriage. Good luck.

Answer 4

basically im in the same boat as you are. my husband is on 3rd shift and sleeps all day works all nite. the kids n i have a back seat to him for hes always tired and like at times he works 14 days straight. i have confided in him, told him i wasnt gonna deal with this any longer and that his job is gonna cost our marriage of 15 years. i dont really think men actually care or do much planning when they chose to marry and have kids. i tell my husband all the time this isnt back in the 50s or so where the wives stayed home to tend to the house and kids its now the world where both parents work and both tend to finances, child raring and such together as a team. at this point i just decided to save my breath continue to make my own memories with my children and have considered i have more of a room mate situation rather than marriage.

Answer 5

maybe is he very stressed and under a lot pf pressure? try puuting yourself in his shoes... is money tight? maybe he cant handle being the sole breadwinner and is afraid to tell you? maybe he feels he is stuck in a rut? if you feel that the relationship is beyond repair than you need to consider what the best for YOU and your kids is... look deep in your heart and figure out whether the sitauation is something you can live with and deal with it accordingly.. good luck.

*** EDIT-- its easy for peoople to say "leave him" but in this day and age.. that why there is so much divorce.. dont give up on something that might stil have some potential... consider what makes YOU happy, first and foremost.. i know its hard but you will make the right decision in the long run.. GOOD LUCK!

Answer 6

Grab him on a non work day, mid afternoon and have a discussion. Work together to figure out ways to maintain the house and have family time. If you're not working, maybe you getting a job, even part time, lessens the strain.

Remind him that all his hard work is for nothing if you can't enjoy it as a family.

If he's truly doing it for the family, and stressed out, he'll welcome the change if he sees it as a life improvement for all. Might have to cut back on some spending - but it's worth it!

Good luck!

Answer 7

Tell him "you aren't the only doctor in this house and we all want to see some patients around here or else!"

How are you and the kids ever going to make any money if you aren't getting some patients! How selfish is he!

Answer 8

Try to talk to him. Marriage counseling?
While it's wonderful that he is working often and helping to provide for your family, he should be able to have enough patience to spend time with you and your children and to treat you properly.
It was his decision to marry you and have children; if he knew that he was going to be working so often and didn't think he was going to be able to handle juggling so many responsibilities, he shouldn't have committed to you in the first place.
If he's not willing to change, then he's not worth it.
At least since he works a lot you'll be able to (hopefully) get a hefty amount of child support out of him (assuming that you are working as well?)

Answer 9

Wecome to the world of marriage,you are not alone 90% of us wives are left alone all day and late at night to rise our kids .They come home eat flap in front of the tv with the remote control in hand.No talking maybe a few yes or no if we are lucky. Wecome to the wife club!!

Answer 10

depends on the job...i am in the military...and they decide my work hours and I really don't have a say ....as far as work hours...now with that said...

patience with wife and kids is a totally other subject.....I am not perfect as a father and husband but I do the best I can...

I make my mistakes like every other husband and father..but I STILL DO love my family...and even with my screw ups and faults...I love them and will do my best to take care of them.

Answer 11

If you want to stay married to him, don't say anything, stay out of his way, keep the children out of his way. You and your children don't deserve this and nothing you say or do is going to change how he treats you. I would bet that he thinks he doesn't have a problem with how he treats you, he would write it off as an "emotional" woman.

I was you at one time, I didn't like it, didn't deserve it and didn't want to say anything to him. I just stayed out of his way for GOOD.