Few years back I met this guy ...i developed a crush on him...but never expressed my feeling. Few days back I saw that guy's profile on a site and i contacted him. I loved that guy's sense of humour and company.Great person to be friends with. I am married and have a girl...he is married and a son as well. We started exchanging messages and have becme really good friends. I did tell my husband about him but not in depth. I have a beautiful marriage but this friendship shows me world from a different perspective. I enjoy it a lot. He has also several times expressed his likeness for me.But i try not to talk about emotions etc.
Am i doing anything wrong by having him as a friend? If i know my limits..can i continue my friendship? according to him..he knws where our relationship would lead to. I told him clearly that my family comes first and i can never do anything to hurt him. I have developed a strange interest in him and i can't think of a day ...when i would not chat with him. Help
2007-08-24 16:18:21 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
eventually u two will start calling eachother and then meeting and then well whata know u r together every day and talk to eachother every day and then u will start having sex with oneanother..honey do u see where this is going...i know i've been there and it sounds like to me u have a great marriage and so does he so why don't u just leave it at hello and start chating with your husband like u do with your guy friend...u want make that mistake if u nip it in the bud now...it find to have friends of the oppisite sex but the way u explaned it,it seems to me that there will be more to this if u don't stop it now...
2007-08-24 16:32:21 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The more you think about someone, the more you convince yourself that something is okay. If you have the slightest doubt in your mind, turn away. Your family is too precious! Focus on the great qualities of your husband and spend as much time as you can with him. When this guy tries to chat with you, tell him you are spending time with your husband and how wonderful your husband is and if he is interested in you physically, he will back off. Then take him off your chat list and move on for your sake. You are obviously a very nice person and you don't need to get hurt.
2007-08-24 16:38:53 · answer #2 · answered by Lisa B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know how you feel, suddenly you have found out, "hey, this guy is different from my husband in some perspective, he is so and so". BUT lady, I can tell you, you can always meet a guy like that from the net, he is not real. He is just your "dreamlover", your "PC lover". And I am so proud of you that you can draw a LINE/ LIMIT, but please talk to your spouse, that maybe in some perspective you want to be treated like your "dreamlover". I'm SURE if you have a good COMMUNICATION, you will find your hubby much more better than him. It is just you probably don't spend much time for him. Remember, your work time is longer than your home time, of course if you don't build a quality MOMENT with your hubby, you will one day fall in love with someone else. So I suggest you REFRESH your LOVE RELATIONSHIP with your hubby, take a break, spend more time alone with him, have a heart talk, take a romance time/dinner. I'm SURE you will find a NEW PERSPECTIVE from your hubby also. God bless. Keep praying to HIM to make you WISE. So sorry if I have mentioned any words that hurt your feelings, but that's for your own good.
2007-08-24 16:36:34 · answer #3 · answered by anwar.tirta 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was in a similar situation, married with a young child, and I met this guy who wanted to know all about me, he listened, and made me think that he really cared about me. I screwed up my marriage by having an affair with him, and realised (about a year later) that it was a simple grass is greener thing.
My advice to you is to not act on anything, there is too much to lose, and you said yourself you have a beauitful marriage. The best thing to do would be to end the friendship, as it poses a risk, even if just in your head, to your marriage. you already seem to have developed an attachment to him, and it will only get worse.
Good luck.
2007-08-24 16:27:18 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Supposedly, marriage is a boundary that in the daylight, none of us would cross. However, this nice, deep, intimacy that you two have going, is taking away from your marriages and creating a little world known in the night time as adultery.
Even if you guys are being honest, how would you feel if your husband formed a "friendship like the one you have now" with another woman?
2007-08-24 16:24:25 · answer #5 · answered by Yankee Micmac 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You're already having an emotional affair. That puts your marriage on shakey ground. How would you feel if your husband did the same thing? Perhaps your focus needs to be on your marriage.
2007-08-24 16:31:15 · answer #6 · answered by mahoganychik@yahoo.com 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not a strange situation, a much too common situation.
You are having an affair...... I can see in your writing that you already know that you are lying to yourself about it and need others to help convince you it's OK.
I would recomend shutting it down before its too late and destroys two marrages.
2007-08-24 19:00:45 · answer #7 · answered by Michael B 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if its really true that u say that ur just friends... nothing wrong with that... but what happens whenit turns out the he wants more than just friendship... like u said, u can control the situation... it think its best that u lay down ur cards... tell him that u're just friends.. and if goes beyond that... u'll be the first to say to him " GOODBYE"
2007-08-24 16:32:59 · answer #8 · answered by skeptic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hmmmmmmm
kinda similar to me
yet for me its a woman I chat with sometimes , cuz I am lonely mostly
2007-08-24 16:30:03 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be honest with yourself about your feelings and intentions.
2007-08-24 16:22:01 · answer #10 · answered by box of rain 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋