I am 39 and heading for the male "mid-life crisis."?

Question

What is it? Do I need to fear it? What should I do to prepare for this mental state?

Answer 1

This is a bunch of hooey made up by shrinks to promote business...simple as that.
Signs: 1)You wake up one morning (years from now, you are far too young) and notice strange "cottage cheese" where smooth skin used to be....OK, well, we settle in for a body change that everyone goes through. You think it through and must decide...what is my real worth as a person? skin? Naw, I didn't think so.
2) You wake up on a Sunday morning, (again, it is Sunday!) and you are in a rut....you start the dreadful thinking process and find that all your dreams as a idiot youngster have not been fulfilled...and you have two choices...either say, OK, I did other things, OR you can get depressed (your choice).
3) You wake up the next day, start balancing the check book and discover you are NOT the multimillionaire you dreamed of being...two choices: rob a bank (will not make you a multimilliaire) or go to the fridge...if there is food for the family, a car in the garage, gas in the tank, a roof of some kind over this bed, you are doing just fine!
4) You see a beautiful woman with young skin and big boobs....your body does not react as it did when you were 18....no instant "ON" button can be found....you start to worry..gee, will I ever get it up again...do not fear, you will, it willl, and all will be fine...and in fact, due to aging, the whole"affair" will be more satisfying than it was when you were 18.
5) You look at your face in the mirror and have no idea who is looking back at you. JOIN THE CLUB! You are official a middle aged guy who is still doing the job, getting things done, enjoying life, etc. So where is the real reason for concern? ..... YOU HAVE JUST FOUND OUT that some day, somewhere, somehow, you are going to die. !! Well, guess what, you knew that somewhere in the back of your mind, and until now, thought you would be the only one on Earth to escape this "doom." YOU are not!
6) Look at it this way...you are going to go through mid-life crisis without a crisis! ED? Hell, the shelves are full of "cures," so that one we no longer have to worry about.
7) Now, if you really are still concerned, do no more than roll over in bed, as you awake, and take a look at your wife! Do you still find her beautiful? OF course you do. Do you still find her sexy? Of course you do! Well, dude, she feels the same way...so get over yourself and get out of bed, get to work, and laugh at yourself...laugh hard...it feels good to be liberated ! Peace from Goldwing

Answer 2

Well everyone does not have to experience it. Only those who get depressed because they are hitting the big 4-0. Actually, you will pretty much feel the same way whether you are 39 or 40.

Nothing to fear at all. Just like who you are, don't feel like life has cheated you, and if you have a wife, keep her. The grass always looks greener on the other side, but normally it is not.

Answer 3

Sometimes I think my whole adult life was a mid-life crisis.

I think I've probably re-evaluated my life goals and been more willing to change directions entirely, than most.

I see life as a high-risk venture, as a growth experience, as a constant re-evaluation process that would lose a lot of value, were it entrenched in concrete goals established during some earlier phase of life and continued by intertia or momentum.

But I think that's what mid-life crisis probably is for most people. A re-evaluation/re-orientation .... a straightening or adjustment to the spine of our lives.

Answer 4

That depends. A lot of people handle it very differently.

When my dad went through his, it was horrible. He got insanely jealous of my mom, cut our phone line from outside the house, inside the box, that way we couldn't get on the internet or make phone calls when he wasn't home! He became extremely condescending, and was convinced just about everything in the world was evil.

My wife's uncle, on the otherhand, sold his SUV, bought a motorcycle, a Honda Civic, and a Corvette! He decided he wanted to move upstate to get his masters degree, while his family stayed 4 hours away!

I really think the way a man handles a "mid-life crisis" really depends on his upbringing and outlook on the world.

Answer 5

A great laugh here. I had a good friend in CA, she is way wealthy--her hub was out playing and drinking and trying to turn back the clock. She had a huge birthday party for him and bought him a Mercedes Convertible, she said, hey it's cheaper than a divorce. It is all in your pea brain if that's what you are stuck with. Never been proved to be a reality. Pony up and stay right where you are and go with the flo.

Answer 6

Only if you let it. The simplest way I can describe this, is to not let a momentary angst over growing old compromise your inherent value system.

I have gotten to know you quite well from reading your questions and answers on here, and I think I can tell you honestly that you are destined to be a fine man. You just have to give yourself permission to grow older. And to embrace all the changes that come in your life. Your judgements are made on inherently sound principles. You just have to believe in that more!

Answer 7

IF YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT IT LOOKS OR FEELS LIKE,THEN YOU DON'T HAVE IT,NOT YET AT LEAST.Have no fears.It can never be bigger than things you have handled so far.Mental State? You are ever ready,so to speak.Just relax and enjoy life.Keep your imagination under your control on this issue.Have a ball.