What happens if you get scared half to death, twice?
Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
A day without sunshine is like night.
On the other hand, you have different fingers.
42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
Remember, half the people you know are below average.
He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the
cheese in the trap.
Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have.
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.
If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.
All those who believe in psycho-kinesis. Raise my hand.
OK, so what's the speed of dark?
When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines
Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
Inside every older person is a younger person wondering, "What the hell happened?"
Just remember -- if the world didn't suck, we would all fall off.
Life isn't like a box of chocolates. It's more like a jar of jalapenos. What you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow
2007-08-23 20:13:02 · 6 answers · asked by Conan 2 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
Some of those are really clever. Thanks for sharing, made me laugh.
2007-08-23 20:18:42 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think they're funny. I recognize a few...Steven Wright, and I think Flip Wilson.
"Sponges grow in the ocean...that kills me. Just imagine how much deeper the ocean would be if that didn't happen..."
2007-08-24 03:20:56 · answer #2 · answered by Tut Uncommon 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
since i have nothing better to do..i read every word of that. i like some of 'em..depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
2007-08-24 03:20:34 · answer #3 · answered by [insomniac] 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Great statement ...I believe all ....just the way you said it all of it. Life is short so enjoy it while you can >>
2007-08-24 03:27:52 · answer #4 · answered by Jay & Gigi 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
haha i think the same as i did earlier & yeah its good !!! :)
2007-08-24 03:23:57 · answer #5 · answered by ausblue 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
99 percent of lawyers.....excellent!
nice job. thanks!
2007-08-24 03:31:15 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋