well, if you couldn't tell from the question-i need help to overcome my shyness. The thing is at home I'm myself (which is absolute insaneness & funky; to be honest) But at school I just shut down and can't seem to bring myself to say/do something with the other person unless it's school work in class and we have to do it. I don't know but every time I try, it just seem like the cats got my tongue and I can't figure out anything to say at all. So my conversation ideas are out the window! I know people say with becoming outgoing: "just do it" but it seems something like an invisible wall just blocks me. Plus, i'm a little afraid that people (just the ones that matter to me) may not like me anymore; like as if they were to be afraid of me! : ) Also, another clitch is that a couple of my role models are like Audrey Hepburn and she was classified as a lady and I like to be like a lady and act like a lady, i don't know, do you think maybe that's another thing that's blocking me?
2007-08-23 17:04:18 · 11 answers · asked by Charnelle 3 in Social Science ➔ Other - Social Science
Please help & Thank YOU!! : )
p.s please nothing inappropriate; i'm trying to look for some good advice
2007-08-23 17:05:36 · update #1
Well I was also shy in school..The best way to overcome shyness is to think up something to say to people. If they are in a group just continue in with the conversation. Get your friends to introduce you to someone that be a little like you..or have similar things in common. It takes time and just getting alittle older. Sounds like you have a lot of things to offer people. You have to decide that you are worth it and that people will like you..If you feel that way then they will. Confidence is attractive. You do need to be open to what other people like too..Everyone is different.
Good Luck...
2007-08-23 18:18:48 · answer #1 · answered by ddcc 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Hi Charnelle! (What a pretty name!) You have a dynamite sense of humor!! You just need a little more confidence. Walk down the halls with your head up high and a smile on your face. Say "hi" to people and just be an all around pleasant person. That way people will become attracted to you, which will in turn help your self-confidence. You can also do a little acting trick, and be Audrey Hepburn for a while. With a little more self-confidence, that funky Charnelle will come out! Try a couple of those little tricks. Good luck! I know I'd love to be your friend!! Later, kiddo!! :)
2007-08-24 19:39:28 · answer #2 · answered by LadyLynn 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
YOU WILL NOT BE ABLE TO OVERCOME SHYNESS ALL AT ONCE. THE PROBLEM REQUIRES YOU TO DO SOMETHING: TAKE LITTLE STEPS, LIKE GIVING PEOPLE EYE CONTACT, SAYING "HI", ETC... JOIN OTHERS IN ACTIVITIES AND DON'T FEEL AS IF EVERYONE IS DEPENDING ON YOU TO BE THE STAR ATTRACTION. ACTUALLY, IT MAY COMFORT YOU TO KNOW THAT OTHERS ARE NOT ALWAYS CONSTANTLY JUDGING YOU AND WONDERING WHY YOU'RE SO SHY.
PEOPLE MAINLY WANT FOR YOU TO BE A REAL PERSON - SOMEBODY WHO HAS THE SAME VULNERABILITIES AND INTERESTS THAT THEY HAVE.
ONCE YOU REALIZE THAT OTHER FOLKS ARE SIMILAR TO YOU IT WILL BE EASIER TO TAKE RISKS AND BE WHO YOU REALLY ARE.
2007-08-25 20:20:59 · answer #3 · answered by GENE 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Well Charnelle, don't fret about being shy. Just learn to be comfortable with yourself. I've seen some people who were not shy....the life of the party....you know the type....but some of them are cold and uncaring....they think more of themselves than they do of anybody else. I have met many shy people and I feel so relaxed when I'm around them, because they seem to actually have an interest in me...and aren't looking through me when I speak with them. I've been shy all my life, but I'm not ashamed of it. And some people that you meet who you think are not shy, actually are. They just know how to put on a big act.
Be proud of who you are. I think you would be a true and caring friend to anybody lucky enough to meet you. There's no shame in being shy.
gere
2007-08-26 13:26:34 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Hi! You just can't jump out there and be a social butterfly all at once. You have to grow; you have to gain confidence in yourself which will then boost your self-esteem which will then allow you to feel like you belong. Explore yourself before you worry about what others are like. Find out what you like and dislike and adjust your lifestyle accordingly. For example, if you like dancing or cooking make an effort to expand your skills within your financial and social limits. If you start enjoying yourself it will affect your personality and people will want to be around you. Be friendly and show concern for others. People like to hear good things about themselves, give lots of compliments and show sincerity. Then go about your business of learning more about what interests YOU. I promise that many of your peers are just as confused as you are but may be hiding it better. Be assertive. Try to learn by the mistakes of others when you can. I hope this helps. Hoku
2007-08-23 21:13:49 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
hey charnelle! i like your avatar can you tell me why you chose that flower in the hair thing? its so sunny, so fresh its lovely.
Start with things like that. something you see about other people, that's what i would say if i were to meet you. Dont think of it as starting a conversation, it's so loaded with pretensions, think of it as simply learning something about the person next to you. Its as simple as that.
Once you start with that, you don't have to say a word about yourself or a topic-you might otherwise have trouble following up on,
just sit back and listen attentively-pretty soon your home will have extended outside and into the world, and at the end of the day you have gained a friend.
...one day at a time.
2007-08-31 15:36:52 · answer #6 · answered by Jon C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is nothing wrong with being shy. A great smile or a coy look is worth more than 1000 words. As a guy, I prefer someone with brains and a smile over a "talker."
Please do not turn into the type of person that is so outgoing it is obvious they are overcompensating for other things.
And DO NOT WORRY about what other people think of you.
2007-08-30 13:34:15 · answer #7 · answered by Bubba the Red 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Eliminate Social Anxiety Shyness - http://SocialAnxiety.uzaev.com/?URiz
2016-06-21 10:50:51 · answer #8 · answered by Annamarie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Practice!Practice!!Practice!!! Do you remember the cowardly lion from the wizard of oz.Play-re play,run-re run,that scene through your mind.That was a play,in your case it can be reality.
2007-08-29 15:45:29 · answer #9 · answered by yp_will_chicago_369 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
im sorry i wish i could help u. i have never been shy a day in my life lol.
2007-08-26 13:00:18 · answer #10 · answered by waterlily750 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋