Well, I'm in school full-time and will be graduating next year. For the past years, I've worked full-time. But this whole year, I haven't worked, only concentrating in school. We don't have financial problem to start with. He makes enough to support me and the bills but the thing is that he thinks I'm a freeloader. In the past I took control of the bills, we saved tons of money, but due to his saying that I'm a control freak, i let him take over. Now, he knows it's not his field, yet won't admit it or give it back to me. Each money, he gives me some amount of money. I told him the money (allowance) he gives me is mine to keep and spend, so he shouldn't be bothering me with bills and other things. So after I said that, he called me I'm a freeloader, using him for the money, WTF! It's not like I'm gonna stay umemployed forever, I will be working once I'm graduated. Can't men be satisfied for once?
2007-08-23 12:32:34 · 12 answers · asked by Confused 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He's got some serious issues. Maybe he's jealous that you haven't had to deal with an overbearing boss or that you don't have to "clock in and out" every day. I'm disappointed that your husband doesn't see the bigger picture of this, that you're bettering both your lives with your education. You need to get that across, and the sooner you can finish school, with dedicated success, the more benefits you will reap. I hope he understands this. But if he is having problems at work and is taking it out on you, ask him if he wants to talk about it and be supportive.
2007-08-23 12:39:29 · answer #1 · answered by Opal 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like your husband doesn't understand what a marriage is all about. Support for each other. You should not have to ask for money. Whether he is earning it right now or not when you got married it became both of yours.Giving you an "allowance" is just really ridiculous . Like you said you are in school so you are not just sitting around doing nothing all day. What happens when you graduate school and are making most of the money. Is he freeloading then? Do you give him an allowance? Do you treat him how he is treating you? Or you do treat him like you're supposed to in a marriage? You should ask your husband about that.
2007-08-23 15:15:22 · answer #2 · answered by Crystal M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know, I am in school to, and my husband always makes snide remarks, makes me feel like a freeloader, but I know in the end, my being in school will make all the difference in the world, so I just tell him to screw off, cause i am not sacraficing my future and my kids for his "now" attitude. Everything has to happen now, well it doesn't work like that. Sure I could work a seven dollar hour job for the rest of my life, but I doubt we would make it very far with four kids.
2007-08-23 12:47:55 · answer #3 · answered by grizzlybearthunderfoot 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WELL, MEN DONT TAKE TO CHANGE TOO GOOD. WHEN YOU WERE WORKING HE WAS OK BECAUSE YOU BOTH HAD A WAGE COMING IN THE HOME. NOW HE IS BEING A LITTLE BOY AGAIN BECAUSE HE THINKS IN HIS OWN HEAD YOU ARE SPENDING HIS MONEY. TRY ASKING HIM WHAT HE MENT AS A FREELOADER AS YOU HAVE ALLWAYS WORKED & WILL BE BACK WORKING AS SOON AS YOU GRADUATE. OR TELL HIM WHEN YOU DO GET BACK TO WORK YOU WILL SORT OUT ALL THE OUTGOINGS & SPLIT THEM ALL IN HALF BETWEEN YOU BOTH THEN HE WILL SEE WHO HAS MONEY & WHO IS FREELOADING. GOOD LUCK.
2007-08-23 12:47:26 · answer #4 · answered by KATIEKAT 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's intimidated by your intelligence therefore he is insecure. If you love him give him an easy out and demand that you resume paying the bills and doing the budgeting, then he will think you are carrying more of the load. While you're convincing him of that just keep reminding him of all the money you're going to make.
2007-08-23 12:42:16 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
To be honest, i am with you, wtf.
Guy and woman can share the responsiblity of paying the bill. But if the man decided to give money for the girl to use, shut up about. I give my girl money even though she has a full time job.
2007-08-23 12:47:58 · answer #6 · answered by ken401lam 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Could you imagine when/if you become a full time mother to his kids? Gawd, you better do a super job, because he seems to be scrutinizing your worth already!
Graduate, get a job and get the h3ll out, he's not gonna get any better- mark my words.
2007-08-23 12:44:06 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
He puts you on an allowance? And you put up with that nonsense? Are you kidding me?
He is being extremely immature. My advice would be to start making contingency plans for the near future.
2007-08-23 12:43:29 · answer #8 · answered by Mathsorcerer 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There are precedents international. He could be referred to as "The President's husband". bear in mind many countries have or have had woman presidents and best ministers who have been married.
2016-11-13 07:09:09 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u r his wife, he's suppose to care for u, or else he shouldn't had marry u....
u r no freeloader. maybe he didn't mean it at all... he may be a lil bit stress. just ignore that, he knows that as soon u graduate u'll find a good job.
2007-08-23 12:38:38 · answer #10 · answered by Delilah 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋