my dad has a girlfriend... and they are living together and are planning on getting married right after my parents get divorced... but my dad cant even pay the child support and he probly will go to jail in september.... and i dont even like his girlfriend! she is so rude to me! she yells at me all of the time... and she says mean things about my mom and half-sister... (my half-sister's dad died wen she was 7, but we have the same mom)
2007-08-23 07:42:31 · 10 answers · asked by Stephanie 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
No matter how old you are, I am so sorry that you are having to go through this. There are no easy answers to your situation. You didn't say what kind of relationship you have with your mom, but since you didn't say anything negative about her, I'm thinking it must be okay. So, unfortunately, it sounds like you are in a position where you are going to have to choose.
Does your dad know about how his girlfriend treats you? If not, maybe you should tell him. If he doesn't do anything about it, then maybe you should make a decision to stay away from him and the situation he finds himself in. It doesn't do you any good to be around people that are going to bring you down any more than you already are just because of stupid parents.
I know that you are hurt, angry, confused and feeling really down and sad. I would encourage you to remember that your parents are not who you are. The negative things they may say about you do not mean that they are true. The negative way they may treat you does not mean that you deserve it. Your self worth does not come from them. Remember that. That is truth.
If you are old enough, get a job. That will help take you out of a negative environment at least for a while. Find a teacher or school counselor that you can talk with that will help you deal with what you are going through. Hang with positive people. Stay away from drugs and alcohol. Those will only bring you down and keep you down. They will steal your self worth, your sense of direction, your freedom and possibly your life.
Make the decision today that you will not be like your father. Take the good qualities he has and focus on those, but also remember the bad and decide today that those are not ones that you are going to claim for your own. And, I would tell you that if you don't know the Lord, make His acquaintance. He can help you beyond your wildest dreams.
2007-08-23 08:04:06 · answer #1 · answered by Maggie May 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
could go either way, depends on the reason for the divorce and how badly the child was affected: 1 - a divorce will be more likely because the child has not witnessed fully the sanctity of marriage and therefore could decide to give up when things get tough 2 - a divorce will be less likely as the child knows first-hand the rough time his parents (and he) had as a direct result of the divorce, and would not like to experience that (or for his children to experience that) therefore he would be more inclined to do whatever it took to make the marriage work. Have I actually answered your question here or just stated the plain obvious? Apologies if you feel I have!
2016-05-21 00:53:00 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When my parents got divorced, it was a bit shocking at first, but then I realised they were miserable with each other. They got along better after divorcing. We all wish our parents would stay together, but sometimes it's for the best.
As for that floosie, reject any invitation to go to lunch or spend the weekend with your dad unless the girlfriend is not there. You have no obligations towards her, she is not your mother, legal guardian or anything, and as such, only your father has to deal with her. Find support in your sister and mother in these difficult times, and remember to do the same for them.
Remember, adults expect young people to respect them just because they are adults, but respect is something to be earned. If the floosie can't earn your respect, she deserves none on your part. Cut the ties as much as you can with her. Be an adult when you talk to your dad about this, don't act like a spoiled brat, act like a grown up with hurt feelings.
Good luck.
2007-08-23 07:59:46 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry you're going through this. You can have whatever possible relationship you want with your dad without the girlfriend around. Be honest with your dad and tell him you want to spend time with him alone, and you refuse to do so with her around. It's his choice. Your mom will most likely back you up.
2007-08-23 07:47:40 · answer #4 · answered by Lady G 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
you need to relax and let the adults take care of their business. tell your dad his girlfriend treats you disrespectful and also talk to your mom about all this and work it out. His problems are not yours. Love him because he is your dad and the same for mom and hopefully, they will work it out
2007-08-23 07:48:03 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry that your parents broke up and that the new girlfriend is a witch...talk to your dad about the things that she is saying. Tell him that it bothers you that she talks badly about your mother and sister...see if that helps.
2007-08-23 07:47:34 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
depending on your state you might have rights to say whom you would rather live with and then if not just talk to your mom and dad one on one or in a group to express your feelings to them
2007-08-23 07:48:12 · answer #7 · answered by oh_jo123 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him to have a nice life and then walk away.
2007-08-23 07:52:27 · answer #8 · answered by Mathsorcerer 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
so what is the problem, if he is going to jail, they can't get divorce or get marry
2007-08-23 07:56:48 · answer #9 · answered by ken401lam 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Tell your father that you will be living with your mom for good and that you will talk to him when he gets rid of that hussy.
2007-08-23 07:46:47 · answer #10 · answered by RedRabbit 7 · 1⤊ 2⤋