I was going to give it another try with my ex...I put in for a transfer from one store to another and even gave my landlord 30 days. My ex came up to help me move back with him and then he hits me with this piece of paper asking me to sign over rights to our little one. I have custody and he has to pay child support...I was willing to drop the child support, but not give up custody of her b/c of how he can be. I have two other children (pre. relationship) and he wanted me to sign over rights to them as well. I didn't do either. Now I am fighting for my job back and have to move in with a friend. I know I did the right thing...as a mother, I did the right thing. He is also trying to be all "lovey dovey" now too. I just dont' get it. Why do men do these things? We have lived apart for 3 years....I was willing to give it a go b/c he kept telling me how much he missed me and wanted his family back...and then he does this. I am at a loss.......
2007-08-23 06:57:41 · 15 answers · asked by Latino Heat 4ever 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You did the right thing, absolutely. I'm sorry that you're in a tight spot now because of his flakiness. If I were you, I'd get the papers to have him sign over HIS rights. See how that makes him feel.
2007-08-23 07:03:02 · answer #1 · answered by cherriebomb 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
He did it because he is a jerk. Just know, no matter how many promises he made. there was a reason you both broke up in the first place, never lose site of that. This was his plan to get out of paying child support payments to you. And yes, you did the right thing by not signing over your custody of your children to him. He fooled you into thinking he was willing to make things work out for him and you, when in fact he had an ulterior motive all along. Lesson here, never inconvenience yourself and your children for any man, no matter what they tell you. If a man really wants to be with you, then he should be the one to sacrifice in order to do so. I am sorry you are going through this and do hope it all turns out well for you.
2007-08-23 14:25:53 · answer #2 · answered by pictureshygirl 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Good Job!! You are correct, you did the Right thing as a mother! I'm glad that you knew what was best for your children. To me, it was a power play. How important is your relationship with him to you? Would you be duped by him... no! You stood up and fought for your kids.
If this wasn't a power play, he figured he could at least keep the kids as black-mail, or simply receive the money from them... it's a harsh reality, that I certainly hope is not the case!
He continues to be lovey-dovey... well then take it slow... Don't, however, confuse your children about the relationship. Try to keep your life as stable as it ever was, or more so. They and you deserve that. And Continue to Rock On as a great Momma to those kids!!
2007-08-23 14:10:41 · answer #3 · answered by Lacey 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, he almost got by with it. Good for you realizing what he was up to. He just wanted to get out of paying child support. I would guess this man is controlling and mean. All the same things will happen that broke your relationship in the first place. What has changed? Nothing. He does these things because he doesn't respect you and is selfish.
2007-08-23 14:06:31 · answer #4 · answered by Julie H 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow, he is what I would refer to as a "worthless pile fo s**t"
You definitely did the right thing.
I can honestly say that I have no idea what his motive was or is, wanting custody of your own child is one thing, but wanting rights to children that are not biologically his? WTF?
Lovey dovey? Tell him that the only time you want to have contact with him is during visitation tiems, everythign else should go through your attorney.
He has a hidden agenda, don't fall for it.
2007-08-23 14:10:17 · answer #5 · answered by Michael H 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
YOU DID THE RIGHT THING!!!!!
you shouldn't sign away your rights to your children, especially from the ones that aren't his... things maybe tough for you right now, but they will get better. sure nice stuff is good, but there is nothing more important than your love for those children. if you sign away your rights you are telling them that you give up. that they are not worth the sacrifice... you don't want to add more pain to their heart. FIGHT FOR YOUR CHILDREN AND YOUR RIGHTS!
as for the child support... DON"T DROP THE PAYMENTS! that's not your money!!!!! that money belongs to your children and it's their right from their father. you are the only person they can trust and that can protect their rights. DON"T LET THEM DOWN! DEFEND WHAT BELONGS TO THEM!!!!!
2007-08-23 14:16:08 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
No matter what, know that you did the right thing. I would also say never believe him.
As to why men do this well all I can think of is (like some women) they don't want their ex's to be happy.
2007-08-23 14:15:55 · answer #7 · answered by Spring 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all why is he asking you to sign over rights to your children? Especially ones who aren't HIS to begin with? Secondly WHY would you give up child support if you have custody of your children? There is something missing here, something you're not stating...this just doesn't happen "out of the blue".
2007-08-23 16:05:25 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
I would have still moved my stuff in, especially after having put my job in jeopardy and giving notice to my landlord, even if just temporarily until I could re-settle myself.
No way would I sign such a paper - it's simple, I would have told him, "listen get that **** out of my face, ... I see two parents here, you and me, and that equals shared responsibility. Period. End of discussion." And then I would have said, "now stop being stupid and help me move this box."
2007-08-23 14:16:58 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like he is just trying to trick you to get the children. Make him pay the child support, it is his obligation. Keep him your X, and I hope you stop listening to him and letting him play games with your heart.
2007-08-23 14:05:15 · answer #10 · answered by Sweet Suzy 777! 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋