What does it say about a person when they don't like compliments?

Question

What does it mean when a person gets embarrassed when they're complimented or when they just say 'shut up' or 'whatever' and look uncomfortable?

Is this something to do with lack of confidence?

Answer 1

I agree that it's lack of confidence or they are modest. They don't really feel they deserve the compliment. I think it's the way they've been brought up.

Sometimes parents and siblings are like perfectionists and treat their kids like crap or get angry at their kids for working hard at something they consider a waste of time (like art) or sometimes parents and siblings made their siblings feel stupid because they didn't like their idea and they make a big deal about it. This makes them don't know how to behave themselves because of it so their face turns red when somebody else compliments them and they try to ignore the compliment because it makes them uncomfortable. They can't tell if it's real or not.

All I know is that's the reason I have a difficult time accepting compliments. I feel like I'm not sure if the person is being really sincere or not. In the back of my mind, I imagine my siblings mocking or laughing at me as if I am foolish to really believe the compliment was genuine. My brother still makes me feel dumb for having terrible, childish handwriting that I prefer to only type in the computer if I have to give a note to someone. He makes me feel like I'm the only one in the world that has crappy handwriting even though I try my best.

My family always says that only family member would tell the truth to help each other and somebody who is not a family would not be honest because they don't care to help you correct your ways and improve yourself. They consider the criticism as helping me out but it really lowers my self esteem. I feel like I am never good enough and I really can't appreciate a compliment when someone else gives me one. Now, even if my own family gives a very rare compliment, I have a hard time trusting it too and I say whatever.

Answer 2

Some people are just fishing for more compliments. But as a norm it has more to do with lack of confidence or feeling it's a sin to be praised.

Plus some people feel if compliments are paid out loud, someone will dispute it and they'll be humiliated.

I love compliments but I do get embarassed because it doesn't feel like I've done anything to deserve it. To enjoy it almost feels egotistical. I've finally gotten to the place where I can thank someone and change the subject. But I still feel the heat rising in my face.

I know we all need acknowledgement and affirmation we've done right. But it's surprising when someone else notices w/o being told. So we're not really sure how to handle it.

Answer 3

I know someone like that and it usually has to do with self-esteem issues or lack of confidence. People with low self-esteem find it very difficult to accept compliments. They often have a hard time believing the person is being sincere because they don't see all the good qualities they have. But that doesn't mean you should stop complimenting them- you may have to reassure them that you really do mean whatever it is you're complimenting them on- eventually they should see that you're sincere.

Answer 4

I can relate to this, I don't say, shut up, but I feel very embarrassed. In my case, it is to do with a lack of confidence. Because of a difficult childhood, I can't understand why anyone could remotely love me. If someone gives me a compliment, I don't know how to react. Likewise, I love giving presents on birthdays and at Christmas, but feel embarrassed when someone gives me something. I am in my late fifties, but only this last few years have realised that my sister and brother are exactly the same. The only physical contact our parents gave us was with their fists. I have a lot of love to give, but only recently have been able to give those I love a big hug. Be gentle with the person to whom you refer, and you may begin to understand what makes them tick..

Poet

Answer 5

It has everything to do with confidence and self-esteem.

We are all our own worst critic. We are harder on ourselves than others are on us for the most part.

When we are not confident in ourselves, we get uncomfortable with being complimented. We want to know what the motivation is for saying such things.. we don't say "thank you" in return, but down play the compliment.

When we are confident in ourselves, we will feel flattered and say thnk you and probably offer a compliment in return.

Answer 6

I have never been able to take a compliment not that i am not used to them, my hubby is a old romantic but i suppose yeah it is a lack of confidence.

Answer 7

lack of confidence is the main factor i think and some people are not used to having compliments so they dont know how to handle them so we should all compliment people more.

Answer 8

Low self esteem and lack of confidence hun. My ex belittled me for so long, i now find it hard to accept compliments.

Answer 9

I would also say a lack of self-confidence. But maybe they were taught that as a child by a significant figure in their life? Or maybe they are overly modest.

Answer 10

take it from a person who fits the description...its insecurity

you dont believe that the person means the compliment because you dont believe it to be true. you therefore dont know how to react.

you dont want to accept the compliment either because you secretly feel like they will be laughing at you if you do because you believe like i said that they dont mean it.