2007-08-23 00:03:31 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Horoscopes
The Onion has the most entertaining 'scopes on the planet! Here are some!
Your Birthday Today
Although many wrestle with latent homosexual urges, you're the only one the stars know who likes to oil up beforehand.
Libra September 23 - October 23
Remember: No matter how bad things get, or how hopeless life may seem, you can always go home again, and take it out on your family.
Scorpio October 24 - November 21
While you often claim that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, those afflicted with cerebral palsy will continue to disagree.
Sagittarius November 22 - December 21
Don't worry, everybody makes mistakes. Take all those people who were counting on you not to screw things up, for instance.
Capricorn December 22 - January 19
You will fly into a psychotic, alcohol-fueled rage this Thursday moments after sobering up a bit.
Aquarius January 20 - February 18
Though your existence often seems to be nothing more than one big practical joke, there may in fact be some higher purpose to all those whoopee cushions you've been sitting on.
Pisces February 19 - March 20
You've never believed in the theory of evolution, but lately you just can't shake the feeling that the monkeys at the zoo seem to be improving their aim.
2007-08-23 16:37:18 · answer #1 · answered by Chaine de lumière 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Go to the yahoo homepage and look up under the horoscopes section and you can read about your star sign for free. Just about most websites will allow you to read about your sign for free. All that you have to do is type in the name of your sign and the internet will bring up tons of internet sites.
2007-08-25 03:09:18 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Here is a link to your birth chart free and horoscopes as well daily, weekly, monthly and yearly
http://www.0800-horoscope.com/birthchart.php
Love & Blessings
Milly
2007-08-23 11:57:22 · answer #3 · answered by milly_1963 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Try www.cafeastrology.com
If you know your birth time, you can get your whole chart done with full descrptions, in the free chart section.
2007-08-23 09:19:58 · answer #4 · answered by stabra 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Try this website here. It sure helped mine out
2007-08-23 07:09:23 · answer #5 · answered by elephante! 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
astro.com
2007-08-23 08:06:15 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
www.insightfulpsychics.com
2007-08-23 13:21:31 · answer #7 · answered by spring26th 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋