He moved out because I called the cops on him for putting a chokehold on our son (15 yr old). He should have apologized and committed to anger therapy instead of trying to make me feel guilty. I just wanted to project our son. He makes me sick. Plus he's such a porn freak! Why does he want to divorce me? I should be divorcing him!
2007-08-21 17:33:57 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He's probably having the time of his life over there in his "bachelor's pad" while I'm raising 3 kids by myself. Why do bad guys always finish first?
2007-08-21 17:36:13 · update #1
Kudos to you for standing up to a bully. No kid deserves to be put in that situation. Now think about this...divorce is expensive...very expensive...so let HIM file. (And if he doesn't file for child support anyway) Don't agree to any stupid demands but don't go crazy either and the judge will take your side. If he did that to his son then he should only have supervised visitation that he should pay for if he is interested in being a part of the kids life. That is the hard part. If you need to disagree on any of his terms get a form called "show of cause" to dispute his demands, go to legal aid if you need help filling it out and file it yourself for like $15.00. ask for child support even if it burns you to do so. When the court gives you the forms immediately go to the d.a.'s office and open a case. It's gonna take time but it will be easier if you do it fast and you know where he works....it will totally help with expenses. Good luck to you.
2007-08-21 17:44:31 · answer #1 · answered by saucylatina 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Rephrased correctly why isn't your husband more self reliant and not dependent on others? Simply put why doesn't he obtain a license? It beats having to drag you out of bed, and having to consider looking from a ride. Socially he could have put up with the other guy for a few minutes to keep you home. So in summary why is your husband such a jerk? Leave the rest of us out of your equation.......
2016-05-19 05:31:56 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ditch the bum!
It is not good to keep porn in the house. You don't want that around the kids. He is probably addicted to it.
You and your kids deserve better.
If he hasn't already filed divorce papers, he may just be jerking you around while stepping out on you. You need to install the idea in his head that there are consequences for these actions. Most abusers and addicts try to find someone else to blame for their addictions and behavior.
Do yourself a favor... collect financial statements of any sort... 401K, retirement plans, savings, bank accounts... you name it. You need this stuff. You should probably get 1/2 of all of it through the duration of the marriage.
Go to the bookstore and get the "do it yourself" divorce guide for your state and read it. You probably don't need a lawyer to file for divorce and get the appropriate child support and spousal support. Filing the papers should only run you a couple hundred dollars.
It is worthwhile to get your freedom and protect yourself and your kids.
The Houston Area women's Center runs legal help services for women such as yourself. See if there is something similar.
2007-08-21 17:47:25 · answer #3 · answered by revsuzanne 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
It might look like he is doing great...but don't worry...he won't be. There are consequences for acting the way he does. He'll discover them sooner or later.
Way to go on protecting your son.
For some reason someone seems to have put a thumbs down on all the answers before...ignore that. Whoever did it probably has the mentality of your husband. Those answers are good!
2007-08-21 20:47:50 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
If your husband put a choke hold on your son, then he does not
belong around you or your children. Period. You must give
yourself over to the Lord and let Him lead you through prayer
and the wisdom He has given you through the study of His
Word. We all have made wrong choices in life but that doesn't mean we have to continue in those choices. Start praying for
you husband and your family, and be prepared to stick it out
however long it takes.
I Cr 13;8a
2007-08-22 03:58:27 · answer #5 · answered by ? 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Because good women let them , dont wait for him to divorce you if he hasnt already filed you file and if he has filed then you go file your own suit and add in the strangle hold he had on your son no child deserves that obviously this father doesnt deserve to be 1 your kids would be better off without him .
My ex husband used to come down when I rang him asking for help with our teenagers and his answer if they didnt look him in the eye was to push them up against the car and choke them he wont be doing it again EVER.
2007-08-21 17:54:21 · answer #6 · answered by JadeyOz 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
i know this is hard..this is where you have to step up ad be the strong woman you are...you will have to become the single parent, the breadwinner, and the fighter, all for your family...
i don't know why men go thru things like this and change so much...all i know is from the womans perspective, the struggles..
but in the end you will have more respect for yourself. and your kids will wee fisrthand how strong you are...
one thing to keep in mind... even tho you will be tempted by all the hurt, do not fight dirty when in court.. be calm and state fact..
be the better person.. i have seen divorces get nasty, dont be like that, be strong...
life will go on and it will get better for you and your kids...
there is life after divorce,, and it will be ok...
2007-08-22 01:13:13 · answer #7 · answered by smurfette 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
They don't finish first - he'll get his.
Stay away from him and raise your children the way you want them to be.
Who cares if he apologizes or not - he is an ignorant brute. Any adult that puts a choke hold on a 15 year old is a piece of crap.
2007-08-21 18:03:29 · answer #8 · answered by Mrs. Goddess 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
It is not over yet.
He is divorcing you because it costs less if you initiate it. Just play it out ... get what you can out of him for support. Get a lawyer from another city if you can. Lawyers from the same city don't always do the best they can for their clients. Get some counselling to learn to cope with your feelings. You have a long row to hoe.
2007-08-21 17:43:38 · answer #9 · answered by bin there dun that 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I hear you girl. Forget about him, men never realize what they got untill it is gone. He will come running back, let him have his fun and you should do the same thing. You never know you might find someone who appreciates you more then the hubby. If he wants a divorce give it to him. Dont let a man see you want him more then he wants you. Men love the chase
2007-08-21 17:39:17 · answer #10 · answered by Bree 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋