Months ago me and my guy returned home to Thailand to have a traditional wedding. Back then it was not a big issue but he has brung it up again. I think its not important at all and he gets really upset for the fact that i do not think its an issue at all. Altho he wants me to take his last name because he says mine is too long (21 letters altho i shortened it by 6) and I like my last name and besides my 2 son's have my last name , After have learned to write it in thai, lao, khmer and english over the years i think its odd id make them change .
2007-08-21 11:47:15 · 13 answers · asked by BPEN CHAI BORORO 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Why can't you both keep your last names? It doesn't mean either of you love each other less it's just a name. If it's important to you that you keep then keep it, if not then don't. Also, you shouldn't make you kids change there names. My mother was married 3 times and I kept my fathers name. It can be tramatic for a child so unless they want to change I wouldn't make them. Good luck with everything!
2007-08-21 11:54:17 · answer #1 · answered by AuroraOz 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is tradition for the lady to take the guys last name after getting married. That could be why he is upset about it. There is really no right or wrong answers here. It can only be settled between the two of you. I know personally I would prefer the lady to take my last name. But if she had a problem with it, I would sit down and try to work it out. It should not cause turmoil in your relationship. It is just a silly problem that needs to be fix. Don't let it hurt your relationship. Talk it out is my advice.
2007-08-21 11:55:33 · answer #2 · answered by chrisschmitt_64474 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know that much about Thais but I do know that traditional Japanese, the woman is expected to take on his last name...not sure about the woman's children from a different relationship, though.
But it is "a mans world" there and he is posturing and flexing his manly/manful/manlike 'rights' as the man.
Just remember, you're in his territory now...his turf...his rules if you want to be a part of his world. Even though he may never have raised a hand to you before, after wedding, the gloves will most likely come off! You better think it over long and hard before you say "I do!"!
2007-08-21 12:02:37 · answer #3 · answered by celticenchantress_1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If its going to be a traditional wedding you need to take his last name, supposedly that's the tradition after the wedding. It might make his family, friends and business colleges think hes weak if you don't take his last name instead of using yours, but i don't know if this is the way his family is. Don't worry tho, if you give him this one thing by using his last name in marriage it wont mean he is Superior to you and that you are his.
2007-08-21 12:03:16 · answer #4 · answered by Tropnevead 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe the guy wants to have the control in the relationship, and therefore a small thing like a name is important. Also, almost everyone grow up knowing that women change their last name, so it is hard for someone to change his/her belief. If you don't want to change your last name, then you shouldn't, but if it is not that important to you, don't be upset about a small thing like this.
2007-08-21 11:57:19 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No it should not if you guys love each other then a last name should not come between you two. However you can do what my parent did and have two last names.
2007-08-21 11:57:40 · answer #6 · answered by Emery 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-10-16 09:31:26 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it wasn't a big deal when you got married then why should it be a big deal now?
I definitly wouldn't ask your sons to change their name! When it comes to your last name it's your choice. He didn't have a problem with it when you got married, so if you don't want to change it he shouldn't have a problem with it now.
2007-08-21 11:53:22 · answer #8 · answered by AriesJWR 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To change your last name shows commitment to the relationship. To not want to change it shows your lack of commitment to him. It's obviously important to him so why not? It would make him happy.
2007-08-21 11:53:21 · answer #9 · answered by First Lady 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What is in a name? Nothing. Keep your name if you like it. It won't change how you feel about the person you love, will it?
2007-08-21 11:52:44 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋