I was so mortified. The medical staff treated me like a cow. I hated being exposed to so many strangers like that. Why doesn't it bother other people?
2007-08-21 07:20:36 · 38 answers · asked by aeidensmommy 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
It doesn't matter to me that the medical staff has seen so many other women. It's just like how I wouldn't want a stranger to inspect me down there, even if they have seen 1000 different vagina's before. I mean, this doctor I had never seen before just walks in and demands "spread 'em" Gross!
2007-08-21 07:38:27 · update #1
First of all, it's not necessary in a normal labor. Not one bit of it. Women have swallowed a great big lie about modern maternity care. Second, inhibition and even just the feeling of being observed prevents normal levels of hormones from being released in labor. You might appreciate these books that look at this issue:
Birth As An American Rite of Passage, Robbie-Davis Floyd
The Scientification of Love, Michel Odent MD
I don't know why it doesn't bother other people. Because they've been conditioned to believe that it's okay for clinicians to look at and handle their private parts? To me, unless there's a serious medical justification for it (and birth is not normally a medical event) it's violating and disempowering.
The good news is that you have other choices. Start educating yourself. Find a doctor or midwife that has the intelligence to understand what nonsense it is for the laboring woman to expose herself during labor, and who will give you the privacy and respect your body and psyche need to birth normally. Birth in an upright position and catch the baby yourself. Have a homebirth if you can, so that you can have more control over who attends you (if anyone) and how they treat you.
Good luck!
2007-08-21 10:24:46 · answer #1 · answered by blueviolet 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
In my experience it depends on the hospital. My first time was horrible! After 11 hours of labor I had to be rushed to the OR for an emergency C-section. There must have been 20 people in that room and at least half of them didn't have a damn thing to do. They treated me like a piece of meat and didn't have any respect for my privacy at all:( My second time was fine. The hospital didn't let more than 5 people in the room at a time including my husband. The staff was very caring and considerate and made the experience as much about me as my baby. I'm sorry you had such a lousy experience. Having a baby is tramatic enough without the medical staff adding to it. If you ever decide to have another baby, my suggestion is to tour the facilities of the various hospitals around. Most of them will be happy to answer any questions you have about procedure,privacy,etc. As an expecting mother you have the right to demand only certain people be allowed in the birthing room. Sometimes you just have to put your foot down in order to protect you, your baby, and your privacy. That sucks, I know. But all you have to do is just look at that beautiful baby to know it is all worth it :) Congrats, by the way!:)
2007-08-21 08:04:35 · answer #2 · answered by madjacksmom 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I haven't given birth yet, but at my ob/gyn's I just feel like they are treating me an anatomy (which is perfectly fine with me). I feel more comfortable that way. I don't think it will be embarrassing for me because I will be thinking about the baby, pain, and all the other excitement so much that the embarrassment will just pass me by. It's like you're in a factory to get that baby out. Now if they make a personal comment on the look of "me" down there while I am going through labor...then that's another story. I would be mortified and probably die.
2007-08-21 08:06:07 · answer #3 · answered by Roz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You had the right to decide who can be in the room and who cannot. Unless there was an emergency you didnt need anyone but the nurse until delivery, and then just the doctor and nurse.
I was in labor for 43 1/2 hours. By the time i was finally pushing they could have marched in the school band and i wouldnt have given a crap.
Birth is natural, and its an amazingly beautiful thing. Women need to get over it. The medical staff deal with the human body all night and day, its many functions are just that. Functions.
Its rediculous to let your fears and inhibitions ruin the most precious day of your life, the birth of a child is the realization of a dream. Not a day to be worried about who sees what.
its too bad you couldnt enjoy it. Next time, let them know you will not allow other people in the room.
2007-08-21 07:26:56 · answer #4 · answered by amosunknown 7 · 6⤊ 1⤋
You may have had a bad experience.
I was a little embarassed because my nurses weren't exactly the friendliest of people.
But by the time it was pushing time, I was like... oh screw it! Legs flew up and vagina was all up in the air!! haha
It could be pretty embarrassing though. I know how that is. I was pretty emabarassed too.
But you know what, it's over with, and the doctors/nurses have seen the worst of the worst and the best of the best, so who cares what they think?
You should have been comfortable no matter what!
But it's okay.
It's over with now.. Please don't try to dwell on it.
It was pretty awkward, yes, but that's ok. It's not like you're the only one who has been that wide open and that view-able before! Haha... Maybe your hospital staff just wasn't too good.
Maybe try another hospital next time!
2007-08-21 07:27:16 · answer #5 · answered by ανєяу'ѕ мσмму 5 · 6⤊ 0⤋
All part of the dis-empowerment of women. This started in the 1920s when pregnancy was treated as a disease, with doctors rather than midwives being put in charge. Next time find a Doula or Midwife. DO YOUR HOMEWORK. Read in library. become knowledgeable and powerful. You must make decisions ahead of time and interview your OB carefully. Especially when the C section rate is pushing 50% in some regions.
Go to a Doc and Hospital that gives a tour, answerrs your questions etc. if all else fails, et a midwife and opt for a home birth!
2007-08-21 07:35:38 · answer #6 · answered by MrNeutral 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
It doesn't bother me because I made sure I wasn't exposed to so many other people!
I was never examined, and birthed at home with only one person in the room aside from my baby and I.
Maybe do it that way next time. Sorry you had such a bad experience, there are other ways. Water births are good for modesty too!
2007-08-21 07:56:28 · answer #7 · answered by Up-side-down 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It is a weird experience. I was confused and scared. I wanted to just go home. I guess I'm glad that the staff knew what needed to be done, and my baby is healthy and happy. The final result is a beautiful child. I figure the staff were just going through the routine as they always do.
2007-08-21 07:25:23 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my gosh, I cannot believe your doctor said that to you. How terrible. I'm so sorry!!
The staff present when I gave birth treated me with as much dignity as there can be.
I was embarrassed when the nurse wanted me to try rolling on the birthing ball. On top of all the obvious stuff, my nose was running!
2007-08-21 07:58:48 · answer #9 · answered by JK 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I wasn't, but I was at a privately owned hospital that was VERY professional and attentive. If you are planning on having another, you should check into a birthing center or another place to have the baby that is more focused on YOU and your baby. You should never be treated like just another woman squirtin' one out. I hope that makes sense. Its all in how you look at it. My delivery was private, and super fast... There was only one nurse, my doctor, my ex, and at one point as soon as baby came out, the pediatrician. Once baby was out and I was cleaned up and covered, then the nurses swooped in to take care of my daughter and clean her up. I'm sorry you had an unfortunate experience, but I PROMISE, it can be better than that!
2007-08-21 07:26:48 · answer #10 · answered by Panda Mama 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋