OK I have been having some emotional problems relating to my relationship with my mother. She pretty much doesn't see me or talk to me but lives 5 minutes from me, she gives me a **** load of money to make up for it which I am grateful for but then I feel guilty for wanting more from her in regards to visiting and playing with her grandaughter. I asked her yesterday why she isnt involved in my life and she said "My mum and dad were so in love with each other and didn't pay any attention to their kids, I am trying to teach you to make Andre (husband) your whole life and only look to him for support. The only people you need to love are him and your little girl, its you against the world and you shouldnt need anybody else. " I thought oh my God she has got it so wrong, because her parents ignored her she wants to pretend I don't exist?? At least I know WHY now, do you think that is a messed up view/excuse ?
2007-08-20 17:26:48 · 4 answers · asked by SmEllY! 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I really feel that she wants me to leave her alone as she has found a new love and they are planning on getting married and all that, he never had any children and doesnt like that my mum is a grandma. I think she feels that throwing money at me is a subsitute for actual attention and will get bitchy and mean if I ask her for more and call me ungrateful and tell me she will take away my house : ( Im scared of her
2007-08-20 17:35:05 · update #1
Tell her there is room enough in us all for more than one relationship. Dynamics will change, but attachments are still there.
2007-08-20 17:31:46 · answer #1 · answered by nursesr4evr 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know don't be to hard on her, she never learned how to give love and she does it the only way she knows how. Just know she loves you in the way she does show it. Tell her that you love her and not the money she gives you and that you miss her so much.. With out making her feel bad so that she does not feel the need to defend herself..So kind of just say Mum I love you for you and although i wish i had more time with you, i know you love me in your own way. Tell her you just wish some times she could love you the way you need to be loved, tell her maybe just some times okay Mum.. ?
2007-08-21 00:41:46 · answer #2 · answered by LittleDaisy. 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
a mother is always a mother she is wrong... she probably does not no how to mother a grown women.. just let her no that ur husband and daughter r ur world but u still want her to be apart of ur world.
2007-08-21 00:32:39 · answer #3 · answered by playinthegame 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it is a totally mistaken view and a bad approach.
2007-08-21 00:30:11 · answer #4 · answered by nickipettis 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋