OK here we go... I have yet to come out to my family as transgender (FTM) and have been trying so hard to figure out all the ways... for A very long time... anyway- when I was driving with my mom the other day she said to me... "you just have to be yourself, whatever that is and if that's a man, then you have to be that and fess up about it" I just blew it off and yelled at her by saying, "do YOU REALLY have to talk about this now?" Nothing more was said. I feel really bad that I didn't respond to her. She's tried to out me before when I was a teenager (15+yrs ago) and I blew it off then too. NOW I'm ready and I blow her off again... what do I do now? I was thinking an email saying, "you're right mom, I am transgender and I'm going to do something about it, thanks for the support"
What do you all think?
2007-08-20 12:13:00 · 6 answers · asked by MTR2007 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Dear MTR,
Coming out is NEVER easy. We risk everything in doing it… Sometimes even our lives.
It’s the relationships we value the least that we find the easiest to risk. The family and friends we truly care about are the hard ones to tell. But the fact is the Transsexuals of the LGBT community have it worst of all. Mom and dad still have there little girl if she’s a lesbian. That’s not the case in the transsexual community. Our parents invest a lot of there own emotional baggage in who they think you are. And tarring down there dream is never easy.
But YOUR case is different. Your mother has apparently figured it out for herself. Be happy that she is willing to be there and to help you with what you are getting ready to go through.
I’m happy for you young man, she has offered you a chance to address the subject face to face and with out all the drama.
Hugs,
PennyAnn
2007-08-20 14:03:50 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's only natural to want to blow her off again, because there's probably still lingering resentment from her trying to out you before you were ready. Also if she really phrased it like that, I find that a bit harsh.
I'd recommend talking to her in person, over the phone at least, because email is a bit impersonal for something like this. Definitely tell her, because you know she'll be supportive. Best of luck!
2007-08-20 19:24:42 · answer #2 · answered by Aura 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Don't do it over e-mail - you owe it to yourself and her to sit down and have a nice talk. It's not a mother/daughter talk - it's a parent/child talk. Just do it and you'll feel how good it is after you've talked it over with her. But do it personally, an e-mail or phone conversation barely manage the emotional attachment the two of you might have.
2007-08-20 19:43:49 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess you are finding it really difficult, your mom sounds like she's on your side, an email isn't very personal, try and talk it through with her...be a man!
You are going to try for gender re-assignment I guess...that's quite a big step, all the best.
2007-08-20 19:22:17 · answer #4 · answered by CHEESUS GROYST 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i think she is trying to support you but you are pushing her away and getting defensive, maybe because you haven't come to terms with it yourself and she said the truth about you and you didn't like hearing it. i like the email idea. good luck :) love SPARKLES!
2007-08-20 19:22:33 · answer #5 · answered by ♥SPARKLES♥™ 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need help dude. Sorry I have to be the one that says it.
2007-08-20 19:36:16 · answer #6 · answered by Dr Jello 7 · 0⤊ 4⤋