How would you deal?

Question

I know I post some funny questions on here, but this one is serious and not for the feint of heart.

(NOT KIDDING).


On Friday I went to the King Center (shelter) as usual. A woman there had no nightclothes of her own, so I lent her one of mine (which actually belonged to my mother). We found her dead the next morning from an apparent drug overdose.

How would you get over waking up to a dead body laying near you? Or am I doomed to be scarred for life?

At first I cried a lot and couldn't explain why.

Now I am numb. I can't explain that one either.

Love hearing any insights you have on it though.

Answer 1

just take it as a lesson in life.. thank god for what you got and go on with your life and try to make the best of it.

Answer 2

I'm not sure what the King Center is, but if I woke up next to a dead woman wearing my mother's nightgown, I'd be scarred too. But then I'd just remember all the scary movies that I've been watching w/ my dad since I was like 6. I'd act like it was just in a movie I've seen. Dawn of the Dead, Land of the Dead, Day of the Dead, Night of the Living Dead, and any sequels, remakes, and spoofs, etc. It might make it more tolerable.

Answer 3

Frankly, I'd be worrited about you if you didnt feel this way.
You're obviously a senstive person who cares for other people. Waking up next to someone who has died is a tremendous trauma. You will get over this, I promise you. I've worked in hospitals for many years and have had more than my share of being close to expired people. I know you realize that the body at that point is just a shell of the person who used to inhabit it. Be glad you did something nice for this person before she died. If you can, talk it out with a counsellor or someone else who can listen to you and console you. Use this experience in your life as a learning tool. I'll bet you're a lot stronger than you think.

Answer 4

It's creepy, but there's worse that could happen to you. And no, you are not doomed or scarred for life, dear. You'll get over it. Take comfort in the fact that you showed her probably what was the last kind act bestowed on her.

Answer 5

My favorite scripture in the Bible is:

"And it came to pass..."

I know that's not an easy answer, but, please think about it.
Time helps your psyche process and file and "rate" things for you, like in logical order.

Also, as horrible as this was, you are now the owner of an experience that, shared with certain others, may be of help to them. To hear your story will make them realize that what they are so upset about just isn't quite so upsetting, like,

dang, I'm the fattest person at work, or,
I hope no one notices that I wear the same 2 pairs of shoes all the time, or,
crap, just look at this broken nail!
or, I'm gonna tell them! I ordered mustard, NOT MAYO!!
.

Answer 6

A person you had never met? I wouldn't worry. The trauma will wear off soon enough. I'd trash the nightclothes, though.

Answer 7

I understand how awkward and stinging it must feel to encounter such a situation. But understand that she is passed on now and that things like that happen. It will only make you a stronger person. You wont be scarred for life- but you'll definatly be a changed person

Answer 8

One day at a time, eventually you will be able to be at peace with it.
Just think though, that woman could have died cold and alone on the streets or worse. i think it is great that you were there to offer her a token of kindness in her final hours - even if no one knew what was going to happen.

Answer 9

I had a job, just after graduating from college, in an apartment building. It was a place for people 55+, and one night this woman called me and told me she found her husband dead in their bed. I had to help her call 911, and I just remember how calm she was...Then, there was this man who lived there who befriended me. He always came to my desk to talk with me. He didn't really have any family that would visit him. He had been a teacher, so we had a lot to talk about (I am a teacher.). One day I came into work, and they told me he had died. It was really hard. This was really my first experience with death...Only one person close to me has died. Other than that, I've really had really no experience with it.

Everybody deals with death differently. It depends on you, your faith, etc.

Answer 10

well, as this was not a person you knew, time will heal the wounds. Death and I do not claim just any life, but you will, over time, move beyond the death and realize that your act of kindness will help you later.

Morg

Answer 11

this is all just a thought but eventually you ll get over it... it may freak you out probably for a while... about the crying part it is perfectly natrual because everyone fears death...and seeing a dead person confirms it...