I've been with this guy for about two years now the only thing is that he has a wife and son in the Philipines. He hasn't had the time or money to get a divorce (although there no such thing in the Philipines it's called anullment) and he can't because she threatens that if he leaves her she will take his son away (& she doesn't really know about me either). He really wants to be with me and I love him as well. We've been through so much together. Unfortunatlly someone sent pictures of the two of us to his wife and now my boyfriend doesn't know what to do and feels that the only way he can keep his son is for us to stop seeing eachother although we both don't want that. He couldn't stop crying to me and telling me how sorry he is to have to decide like that and I understand and don't want him to lose his son. What can i do cause we still do love eachother so very much? What can he do so we can be togehter but won't lose his son either?
2007-08-20 08:42:16 · 15 answers · asked by *hayn/filipina* 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
How does it work in the Philipines? What can we both do? I don't know the system is in the Philippines can someone please explain to me!!! Serious answers please!!!!
2007-08-20 08:53:26 · update #1
Ok yeah all you guys can tell me that I shouldn't be with a married man in the first place but he's the one that chose me. He's not happy with his marriage to her because of situations that took place between them. You are all telling me that you would give up the chance to be with someone that you really love and just be miserable for the rest of your life with someone you don't love?! Oh and about his son, I do care for him because I have a little girl of my own same age as his son. My daughter grew very fond of him and looks up to him as her dad.
2007-08-20 08:59:57 · update #2
Do the right thing and leave the married man alone. If you leave him alone, he can get the annulment, not lose his son, and THEN come back to be with you. Good things come to those who wait.
2007-08-20 08:46:02 · answer #1 · answered by Happy-2 5 · 7⤊ 0⤋
Tell him to get a divorce and visitation ordered by the court. If that won't work for his country, move on.
I have a lot of questions about this situation, how often does he see his son because he lives in the Philippines. What are the laws there. Why is he still married, there is more to this then meets the eye. I'm sure he can get visitation.
If he loves you, he will get the divorce, still see his son and be with you. To much negative in this relationship situation. Sounds like you need to make a big decision.
2007-08-20 15:50:52 · answer #2 · answered by stormey_84074 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Does the phrase hoodwinked mean anything to you. If a person really wants a divorce they can find a way to get one. If you want to really know whats going on ask his wife. You only know his side of the story. If a man really loves you and wants to be with you they will do what ever it takes to be with you. Instead of him being a real man telling his wife that it is over and that he wants to be with you and have visitation rights to his son he would rather get rid of you. What you need to do is go on line and see what the divorce laws are. Not trying to be mean but she is probably getting ready to come here and he needs to get rid of you. Married men do this everyday all day long. He has showed you are on the back burner. Trust he will always be around you allowed him to have his cake and ice cream. He know he can be with his wife and keep you on the side. If you don't mind being second stay with him. You have a daughter do you want her husband to cheat on her.
2007-08-20 16:34:43 · answer #3 · answered by kathycts 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the best thing is for you two to stop seing eachother until he gets his anullment and than he doesn't have to worry about his son being taken away. It get's more difficult when a child is involved and you have to put yourself on second place and think about the child. Step away from their marriage until everything is official and than you and him can see if you still want to be together. You never know if this will come back around to you. do the right thing. And you know what the right thing is. Put your feelings aside and think logically.
2007-08-20 15:49:44 · answer #4 · answered by dimond703 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's married. Even tho he's at fault also, you need to back away, and find someone single. If he loves you enough, he'll choose you. His wife cannot keep the child from him. It doesn't sound like he ever gets or see's his child now anyways, so what's the difference? Sounds like he wants his cake and eat it too.... and got busted. Think about how the wife/mother feels. Let them have their family together.
2007-08-20 15:54:29 · answer #5 · answered by sunflowergal 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's the one that created this mess. If he wasn't happy in his marriage, then why didn't he end it BEFORE he started a relationship with you. Then none of this would even be an issue. It sounds like the classic, my wife just doesn't understand me line. I have no pity for him. He played the game, now it's time to pay the price.
2007-08-20 16:07:41 · answer #6 · answered by ╚╔╩╦ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HE'S STILL MARRIED!! What is it that you don't understand? Of course HIS WIFE was going to have a problem with it, and take it out on him through his son. It's not right, but that's what you get for dating a MARRIED man.
2007-08-20 15:48:52 · answer #7 · answered by ron-D 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
What are you doing with a married man?
I don't care how good their sob stories are, married men are off limits. Period. How would you feel if you were the wife and he was off with someone else? She's doing what she has to do to protect her child and keep her marriage.
Tell the jerk to go home and take care of his family and you go out and find someone who is available.
2007-08-20 15:48:01 · answer #8 · answered by JD 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Dear, I hate to tell you this but I have too, You are in jeapordy of losing your eternal soul to the devil ! He is too ! Adultry is a hellbound sin ! Split up and never date a married man again unless he is your husband ! Find a church and accept Jesus into your heart !
2007-08-20 15:59:18 · answer #9 · answered by lonewolf 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forget about this married man who is just temporarily separated from his son and Filipino wife. If you love yourself, you will break your relationship with him because he will only give you problems and heartaches. You deserve a better guy.
2007-08-20 15:48:37 · answer #10 · answered by Belen 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋