The norm in America seems to be for both parents to work and for the young baby to be put in a daycare center. The daycare centers tend to me crowded, small, too expensive, and have uneducated and underpaid employees. Why is this acceptable to most American mothers?
2007-08-20 08:19:32 · 33 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
a lot of the time it is because they have too and in america we can work unlike a lot of ppl in the world
2007-08-20 09:08:51 · answer #1 · answered by iamblessed 6 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Well it depends on where you look for the daycare. You can find ALOT of daycares that have a certified staff and usually include some kind of preschool with there program. It also helps children socialize esspecially if they are an only child. Its true that to many people are having children before they can afford them, forceing both parents to work, but that doesn't mean all daycares or forms of child care are bad. I went to daycare because my mom was an only parent and then after a few years I started going to a babysitter. I enjoyed all my experiences with both places as a kid. My boyfriends daughter goes to daycare as well and likes all her teachers and gets to play with the other kids there. So I think you should research some more before you bad mouth childcare.
2007-08-20 08:29:41 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 7⤊ 1⤋
First off, some families can't afford to have one of the parents stay home. Secondly, not all daycares workers are uneducated. The daycare that my children went to before I stayed at home, had a degree, and was going back to get another. Make sure you know what you are talking about, before you down every daycare and Americans.
2007-08-20 08:57:47 · answer #3 · answered by orphan annie 5 · 4⤊ 1⤋
My daughter is in a lovely place with children whom she truly enjoys the company and her teacher is like a mom to the children. She is totally loving and nurturing. And there are only 3 children to a caregiver by law in my state- which is the same amount that a mother could have naturally anyway- You have to find a place that is suitable. Yes I have seen the bad daycares, and I feel AWFUL that any mom (maybe a single mom) has to leave her angel there-
Statistics say that the success of your child is more determined by socio economic class than BY any other factor, so it is important to me that my family can live in a home in a neighborhood with good, reputable schools. If money were no object- I would RATHER stay home with my daughter. I miss her so much during the 6 hours she is at nursery school.
2007-08-20 08:34:00 · answer #4 · answered by quirky 5 · 5⤊ 1⤋
Haha, WI MOM, you live in the perfect world. Not all of us do.
Same goes for the original questioner.
Props to you for having a wonderful life, but reality dictates it can't be that way for everyone. For all the people living a lifestyle like you, there could be 10 or more people living in a lifestyle that demands a daycare center, food stamps, welfare, or other types of assistance.
Sometimes birth control fails! Sometimes the condom breaks! And SOMETIMES, women DON'T have abortions, and decide to raise their children, even without a father, despite not having a college education or a live in nanny!
This is me. I wasn't ready for a child. I WAS in a committed relationship, we WERE having sex, and I WAS using several methods of birth control!! But guess what! My son demanded life and here he is! I could've had an abortion, and not had to put him in daycare. BUT I chose to have him, and even though it's hard, and even though I need help, and even though this is not YOUR idea of a "perfect" family, it works for us, and it's the best I can do.
Off my soapbox now. Seriously though, quit being so judgemental. Just because it works for YOU doesn't mean it works for EVERYONE.
EDIT TO ADD:
So all you moms that say "I wouldn't have had children if I didn't plan on raising them" or what not, what you're saying is if you got pregnant and HAD TO WORK, you would rather have an abortion or put your baby up for adoption than be your child's parent and work too?? *gasps*
2007-08-20 09:07:19 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 6⤊ 1⤋
I'm looking at this question from both sides - I stayed home with my first three, but my baby is in daycare while I go back to college.
If you can afford to stay home, more power to you. The ONLY reason I was able to stay home was because my husband was in the military and we didn't have to pay for medical insurance. Then we did without a lot of things that a lot of people take for granted - we ate mostly beans and rice with meat thrown in as a luxury, we didn't have cable, we did without a car for a while... Then when he got out of the military, we couldn't afford health insurance for our kids so I made the decision to go back to college and finish up so we could have two incomes. My kids were all in elementary school at the time.
Then I got pregnant with my fourth. Now I am so far in debt from student loans that if I stayed home, we wouldn't be able to feed our family. I refuse to let the government subsidize my children by getting on food-stamps, so my only choice is to go on and finish college, graduate, and get a job so that I can afford to pay my loans off.
Thank you so much for your judgmental attitude, by the way. Really made my day - I feel like such a good mother now.
*walking away, muttering a word that sounds suspiciously like 'bass-pole' under my breath*
2007-08-20 08:40:21 · answer #6 · answered by CowboysFan 5 · 8⤊ 1⤋
the cost of living has gone drasticly up in my area to rent an apartment or home it is over $1500 a month...now try to support a family on one income!!! Daycare centers are only required to have a certain number of children per adult...and it also depends on the room size...i've worked both in a center and ran my own daycare...you have to be licenced for home daycare and in both you have to take a certain amount of classes (depending on how many hours you work) per year, you have to go through back ground checks, TB tests, finger printing, CPR/First Aid training....i not only have to meet with the fire marshal yearly, a nutrionist monthly, we get inspected without prior notice from the state, and i also plan educational activities which EVERY ONE in my family is a school teacher so i know the standards to what they need to learn before entering school or before advancing to the next level...I am not uneducated, i rather think you are for making such assumptions without facts to back up your statements, and i am not underpaid and i do not underpay my employees....we work hard for a living...when my parents come to either pick up or drop off their kids i expect my daycare to be well mantained, kids clean, well feed, and using their mannars at all times....i do not run my daycare like a boot camp but i do have some rules to make things run smoothly....when you check daycares out the first thing you look for is how the kids are playing and how the providers are interacting with the kids, look for a daily schedule, take a tour...you are allowed 7 kids (including your own) in a home daycare if you are the only staff and if thats all you have room for...i love it when the parents pop in and not call me in advance it shows me they are interested in their childs well being and they tell me afterwards they have complete confidence that i know how to run my job....so don't knock us childcare providers for helping out the average families....there aren't enough of us out there...and here you are putting us down!!!! YEAH FOR THE WORKING FAMILIES!!!!!
2007-08-20 08:42:21 · answer #7 · answered by buschchick 4 · 7⤊ 1⤋
"too expensive"...
1) You're paying someone to watch your most prized "posession" (not the right word, I know) so dont you want them well paid?
2) If it costs $5 an hour and you make $20, that still $15 more than if you stayed home.
Its about affordability. I, for one, am lucky enough to have a different shift than my husband and dont use a daycare...but I certainly sympathize with those who are forced to go that route, adn wouldn't attack them or their choice.
2007-08-20 08:58:52 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 6⤊ 0⤋
Because a lot of people have no choise....in this day and age it takes two salaries to run a family.....are you trying to say that only rich stay at home mothers should have children? My four year old daughter is in a wonderful preschool and has been there two and 1/2 years and she LOVES it.....she is well socialized, caring of others and speaks some spanish....which is required in schools this day and age.....I speak NO spanish and my four year old daughter can speak a lot more than me. I think they are a great start toward education.....the girls that work there are all in college working toward a degree in some age group of education. I love it and feel safe with it. I picked the more expensive one because I can check online on her when she is there and the food is healthier than most locations and it is just a great atmoshpere for her at the stage in her life. I would love nothing more than to stay at home with her everyday.....but unless your spouse makes tons of money to support the whole family then it isn't really an option.
2007-08-20 08:31:14 · answer #9 · answered by Heather B 2 · 7⤊ 1⤋
A lot of people here have mentioned that they have to work to support their families, which is the case a lot of times. I know of people in both situations--1) they have to work to suppot themselves...but I also know people in situation 2) they have a really nice big house, two nice cars, a boat, a cabin somewhere, expensive clothes (i.e., expensive lifestyle) and so, yah, they end up having to work to support that. You don't have to make a bunch of money to make it work. My husband doesn't make very much money, we pull in a little over 2,000 a month and we still get by just fine. There were a lot of things i had to cut down on, like buying clothes all the time, or eating out all the time, but we're fine. We make our house payment, pay all our bills and still have plenty of money for food. I think that in many situations (not all) you could make it work if you cut back and tried really hard. But it's not for everyone. I love being home with my son and wouldn't trade it for a nice car or a nice boat.
2007-08-20 08:32:37 · answer #10 · answered by accent_01 2 · 4⤊ 1⤋
Because we don't have much choice. I can't afford to stay at home and frankly I think I would go nuts if I did. Yes I love my day off with my baby and I can't wait to pick him up, but when I was on maternity leave, I was very crabby from being with baby all day and night. My daycare is certified and I think he gets better care there then at home!!! Certified daycares have to have a certain amount of education and have to follow strict guidelines to stay certified. He's always getting the attention he needs and he appears very happy. I have a family daycare. She has her own 2 kids, plus 2 others besides my son. It helps his social skills and developement. He has reached milestones sooner, trying to watch the other kids play. Plus he gets used to being around other people then just his family.
2007-08-20 08:34:10 · answer #11 · answered by xraydri 3 · 6⤊ 2⤋