I have been having problems with my bf son for years. Last few times he was at the house he was horrible and I told my bf I didnt want the kid at the house indefinitly.Last night my BF had him stop by the house without asking me first. I am scared of this kid, I locked myself in the bedroom,and I am still a nervous wreck.He is 13 but is very big and strong for his age, and very unstable...cruelty to animals, violence, etc.He called when he was a minute up the road with his mother.He just walked in the door, no ringing the bell or anything. He hasnt done anything to me (yet) that would justify a restraining order, if I can even get one against a 13 year old, but I was thinking of sending a letter to my bf by certified mail telling him the kid is NOT welcome at the house(that I own) Before you call me selfish, remember that I am scared for my safety, or what he might do to the house, car, etc.I am sitting at work with my stomach in knots. The kid has shoved me more than once, I'm done
2007-08-20 05:26:38 · 22 answers · asked by eastcoastdebra 3 in Business & Finance ➔ Renting & Real Estate
Yes, get a restraining order. It may ruin your relationship with your BF, but if he can't respect your rules, AND if he has raised such a monster anyway, I'd have him out the door so fast his head would be spinning.
2007-08-20 05:31:11 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 3⤋
First, the BF needs to be an ex-bf, if he is allowing the son to come in when he knows you don't want him to. This is a bad relationship, no matter what happens with the son. I'll tell you now, the son comes with the BF. So if the son frightens you - the relationship with the BF should be frightening you.
Second, as long as the house is in your name (not the BF's) you can tell the son to go and if he doesn't you can call the police for trespassing. That might not hold if BF is still your BF, then it is nonviolent domestic. Only if it turns violent. But if it is ex-BF and the son is doing this then the police should take attention. There are some serious stalking laws and the like now.
So your steps are:
BF is now EX-BF!! I can't emphasize this enough. You may love the man but he has a freak on his back. Don't do the "but I love him" thing. There are other men without freaks on their back. Don't do this to yourself. Say with me... the BF is now EX-BF!!!
Make sure ex-BF and son know that son is not welcome!!
Document all contact with ex-bf's son
If he shows up, tell him to leave, then call police about trespasser. Be willing to press charges.
If it keeps up, with documentation and trespassing you can get a restraining order.
Good luck
2007-08-20 05:42:27 · answer #2 · answered by rlloydevans 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
First of all, I don't think I'd keep a BF that didn't respect my wishes.
Second, if the kid has shoved you, you can get a restraining order against him. Call the non-emergency line at your local police station and talk to them about the situation.
Inform your BF and the child's mother in writing via Certified Mail Return Receipt Requested (the little greed card) that the child is not to be on or near your property and is not to have any contact with you. His father can see him at his mother's house or at a local restaurant or something.
Remember that the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. Consider getting rid of that BF. Good luck. :)
2007-08-20 05:34:12 · answer #3 · answered by searching_please 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
So you're scared of your bf's son. You've told your bf this and that the son is not allowed near you or your house. Yet the boy came to your house with your bf's knowledge.
Aside from having an unstable, possibly dangerous kid, your boyfriend doesn't respect you enough to 1) protect you or 2) respect your wishes.
Dump the bf NOW. This will only get worse. Is your life and sanity worth this jerk?
2007-08-20 05:37:52 · answer #4 · answered by MJ3000 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yeah, dump the bf. You should be able to get a restraining order on the brat for shoving (that's called battery). If he has threatened you, that's assault. Most places you can actually have someone locked up for either offense. But, your bf is not going to give up his son. Lose the bf. If the brat is still a problem, get a restraining order and an attack dog.
2007-08-20 05:36:26 · answer #5 · answered by largegrasseatingmonster 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you may desire to admire his son's needs. exhibiting up at an experience you have been instructed to not come to will in hassle-free terms reason greater harm emotions, and in all hazard smash the day on your destiny son-in-regulation. i don't in my view consider them asserting you won't be in a position to come, yet i'm specific there is greater on your tale then merely what you have suggested. Ultimatly, it incredibly is HIS day, not you & your boyfriend's day. you will be able to desire to admire that, regardless of if neither of you has a similar opinion with it. you in addition to could desire to take care to not alienate your boyfriend from his son in this, the two, because of the fact they are father & son, and together as i'm specific the father is disenchanted, he should be on the brink of his son. Lives are too short to be disenchanted over issues that may truthfully be forgotten. additionally- the less you push or make a fuss over being invtited, the lots greater probably the son & bride are to recover from it, and in all hazard invite you.
2016-10-16 05:46:34 · answer #6 · answered by broderic 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For one, the mother@$#! would NOT put his hands on me! I don't think your being selfish.That is YOUR house and that kid is not to old to get his *** beat! He only comes in without knocking because he thinks he can get away with it, and that his dad does not care! I would put my foot down, and let that kid and your bf know that this will not be tolerated. You need to tell your bf to get his son in check and to stop
disrespecting you! Stand up to that kid. Don't let him know that you are afraid of him. You have the right to say what you want. You are the adult, that kid is not! I would let your bf know that if he loved and respect you at all he would put his foot down toward his son. It could work!
2007-08-20 05:43:31 · answer #7 · answered by LO7VE 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your bf is allowing this against your wishes, you've got a much bigger problem than just he son coming to your home uninvited.
I don't think you are being selfish, I think you are being cautious. But you should carefully evaluate the whole relationship - sounds like the kid comes as a package with his dad, and that might not be worth it. The son obviously has major problems, and sounds like he needs professional help. You could try suggesting that to his dad.
Good luck. Stay safe
2007-08-20 05:40:47 · answer #8 · answered by Judy 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Tell the BF to leave. Get a restraining order for the boy.
2007-08-20 05:38:39 · answer #9 · answered by Othniel 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The shoving and walking into your house against your will is enough to get a restraining order.
Get one for the BF too, at least ban him from your life. He should respect your wishes regardless of his agreement with them.
2007-08-20 05:39:25 · answer #10 · answered by Landlord 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You can get a restraining order, I think. He's so young though... I am not sure of the law in your area.
This kid needs therapy FAST. His daddy should be doing his job here... tell him to take care of his son.
2007-08-20 05:33:18 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋