that she has dated me for the last year during her seperation or them finding that out after the fact.
Im about to meet her parents and we dont know how to handle it.
should she tell them we have dated for the last year and have become very very serious or...
should she introduce me as a new boyfriend that had she met over a year ago and we just hung out alot until recently....
down the road we are planning to marry.
we have talked about it and that is what we both want when the time is right.
I just dont want them to not even give me a chance because i dated her before her divorce was final
however...
I also dont want them to find out and then hate me for it.
what would you suggest the best way to handle this would be
thanks
2007-08-20 04:26:06 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
My experience with conservative parents is that conservative parents of adult children know what the world is like and therefore refrain from asking personal details that may reflect the son or daughter's rejection of conservative views. Nearly all conservative parents are in denial and are more afraid of losing their adult children than willing to speak their minds.
The best thing to do would be for her to introduce you as a boyfriend, but to say no more. If the parents ask how you met, explain briefly and don't say when and they won't ask for that particular detail.
2007-08-20 04:36:50 · answer #1 · answered by skunk pie 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It'll look worse if they find out later. As long as she did not date you until she was separated, she did nothing wrong. Really it's none of their business. Divorce proceedings can be long, and a year is a long time to go with no companionship. She shouldn't feel the need to be apologetic. What makes it hard is that is sounds like she kept you a secret for the past year, which seem suspicious when they do meet you. She should be the one to handle the unpleasantries of that aspect of it.
2007-08-20 04:39:47 · answer #2 · answered by Sandy Sandals 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be honest! It is always worse to hide something and them find out later! Tell her to introduce you as her boyfriend, not new boyfriend. If the get nosy and ask (which they probably will) how long you two have seen each other then tell them the truth. If you are planning to marry her you don't want to start the marriage out based on a lie do you? No.... so tell the truth.
2007-08-20 04:33:29 · answer #3 · answered by gorgeous 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
either way does not have a good outcome it seems however better to be honest than to lie. Only say something if it comes up in conversation. YOu don't need to say "hi we have been dating for a year". Honesty always wins out over lying although it may take time
2007-08-20 04:32:31 · answer #4 · answered by chris d 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ouch, that's a tough one. My parents would kill me either way, so taking that into consideration I think I'd just tell the truth. But, if they try to make a big deal out of it, remind them that you could have lied but chose not to. I think most conservative parents, reminded of that fact, will just be glad you told the truth. At least, it works on mine.
2007-08-20 05:12:43 · answer #5 · answered by mommymartin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They will ask how long you have been together. Just say that you have been friends for over a year but started dating recently. Why be totally honest and upset them and make thins worse for yourself.
2007-08-20 04:42:43 · answer #6 · answered by Luv2Answer 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honesty is always the best policy. If they find out later, you risk losing her parents trust in you. I'd tell them now that you two have been dating for the past year...
2007-08-20 04:39:00 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dude.
Consider this: Integrity is a key ingredient in any good and healthy relationship. Integrity means being who you say you are, not sneaking around, and behaving in a way which is inherently honest.
There is nothing honest about dating somebody who isn't divorced yet, and you are here asking if you should let her parents know, so you have been living at least one more lie.
The holes people dig themselves into amaze me.
2007-08-20 04:32:45 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
She should tell her parents the truth before you meet them. There is nothing worse than the awkwardness when something like that comes out while company is there.
2007-08-20 04:32:56 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Just tell the truth. Be careful you appear calm and reasonable at all times, you want her parents to see you as a good partner for their daughter and not as a hippie or a nutcase or whatever.
2007-08-20 04:32:38 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋