I am happily married but I keep on thinking about being with a woman. What should I do?

Question

i have talked to my husband about it and he likes the idea. i know that i am in his heart and we have a very good relationship. I just need a little more insight about it that'a all. we have no jealousy. neither one of us has ever cheated before and we wouldn;t consider this cheating if we were together .

Answer 1

Good golly - people sure are passionate about this subject. You mention an interest in a fling with another women & suddenly you need to be divorced and labeled a lesbian. Sheesh!!!

This is only a decision you can make for yourself. I would talk to your husband though. If he loves you, and if this is something you feel strongly about -- perhaps you two can work something out to include another women.

Just be honest with yourself, with your husband & with any future potential partner. And realize too - that sometimes the fantasy is better than reality.... you only need to weigh out how deep your desire is ...

Good luck with it --
be peaceful. shine on.

Answer 2

So, you think you may be Bisexual? Well, I see this working out one of three possible ways...

1) You have an experience outside your marriage with another woman. Either your husband knows and is ok with it or you keep it a secret.

2) You tell your husband how you feel and decide to try a threesome.

3) You decide that you will just enjoy the fantasy and never actually be with another woman.

Traditional marriage means that you forsake all others, that means men and women. However, a lot of people have less traditional marriages and bisexual spouses are allowed to indulge with members of the same sex. Its really up to you and your husband. Some men would be thrilled with the prospect of a bi wife, some are hurt and threatened by it.

You know your spouse better than we do. Talk to him about it and see what his views are. If he is not ok with you exploring sexually with another woman, you will have to choose between your desire for a woman and your marriage. If he is ok with you having sex with another woman, you will have to decide how much of an impact it would have on the marriage and if the risk is worth it.

Good Luck.

Answer 3

I would strongly recomend talking with your husband and try to figure out what it is that you are missing in your sex life with your husband. I dont think it is normal to want to be with someone of the same sex weather it be male or female. Going outsid of your marriage is cheeting! i dont care how you slice it and no matter how much it seems like a good idea to you or both you and your husband at the time, in the end it is very likely either you or your husband will get hurt.

Not to mention if we were talking about a married man wanting to be with another man, I think everybodys comments would be very different (why the double standard?)

Answer 4

My husband knows that have been with women before and one time when were not living together or married at the time "you know on a break" Anyway, I love my husband very much and do not share with anyone and he feels the same.We talk about it when we are having fun, but we are just playing, we know the boundaries ! Do not do it, I have had friends that did and it caused major problems in their marriage, now divorced.

Answer 5

Sounds like my first marriage. Why do women always "discover" bisexuality AFTER the wedding?
As always, sit down with your husband and talk to him about your interests and attractions. See how he feels about it and don;t press for an answer. Remember: you're asking him to allow you to step outside your emotional and marital boundries here and there's always a risk of losing it all.
But if you are both very strong in your love and trust for one another, then perhaps you should set up guidelines and rules that will be comfortable to you both.
I have to stress this: Be willing to cut all the extra stuff out in a moment and forever if he feels threatened by any of it. Preserve the marriage before anything else. (obviously)
Good luck and enjoy.

Answer 6

Consider talking to someone about that, such as a counselor. Do you think you are a lesbian? Have you been with a woman before? Really consider talking to someone because if you want to be with a woman you don't want to continue in a relationship where you aren't happy.

Answer 7

First you need to talk to your husband about it. He may like the idea of watching you with another woman. If you both agree and you have someone in mind than go for it.

Answer 8

It's normal for a woman to want to experience being with another woman. Just a lot of women never act on the urge. Talk to your husband about your urge. If he's a normal man he'll be excited that you would think about doing such a thing, but don't do it just because he wants you to do it. Consider trying more creative things with your husband in the bedroom. Maybe some things are lacking in the bedroom that your just not sure of. If anything get some porn or something of girl on girl and use that as your alternative to being with a woman.

Answer 9

HELLO TESSIE............Man, I don't get YA sometimes, they give this "HAPPY2" numb-nuts looking fool "Top Contributor" and he gives answers like this. I don't get it!!! Anyway, what you are experiencing is near normal, unlike this "Happy" moron, I'm not going to recommend you start watching lesbian videos.....yeah, that's what every married woman in America ought to do, look at lesbian videos while the ole man is at work. Like I said, let's hope this is just a passing fad. I don't know what your marriage is like, acting on these feelings will make changes you aren't ready for............LATER......

Answer 10

Talk to your hubby. If he's like most men he'll be happy about it.

I am bi and what I do when I want to be with a woman is I watch porn with my hubby (sometimes he touches me during, sometimes we masturbate while I watch the video and he watchs me).