I am 30 years old male. All my life I have easily gone from long term relationship to long term relationship. I have noticed a pattern inmy behaviour. After 3 years I just get bored of my partner. I start to get easily tempted to be unfaithful and unfortunately find myself cheating and then ending the relationship. I know that I should be more mature. Does anyone have a similar experience or some sound advice?
2007-08-19 18:55:16 · 14 answers · asked by goldenpig 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
yes. i have some advice.... or observation, whichever.
perhaps you are not prepared to settle down with ONE person right now? Maybe you never will?
why don't you give yourself a year or two of dating more than one person, getting together with friends, deciding what you want from life, setting goals, and focus on YOU.
also don't make committment promises to anyone... you can be up front and say you're non committal, and just dating, nothing further. that way, no one has expectations of you for more.
maturity has nothing to do with this.
2007-08-19 19:03:02 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Once you get into a day to day routine seems you find yourself bored. It is easier to start a new relationship because the excitement of the unknown and something new is very enticing. Plus sounds like your lazy. Don't know how to spice it up, so you just keep doing what you have always done. Start new, don't have to work at a relationship. The new person doesn't know anything about you. In other words you never evolve. Sad, because having someone love you and stay with you warts and all and continuing to grow with that individual is great.
A relationship is more than sex. As long as you just want to stay in a superficial relationship then you will. It really a matter of do you really want to be in a committed relationship and it is a matter of your free will to decide that you do. You don't have to give into temptation.
2007-08-20 02:13:39 · answer #2 · answered by Nicole 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you're entirely alone. I have a very good male friend (26 yrs). He makes a point of posting everywhere he visits online (ie: myspace, etc) that he is single, and not into committed relationships.
He's not mean about it, it's just the way he is. He wants to see and meet many many females. I think he's desparately seeking the perfect future bearer of his children honestly, me and him have had some heart to heart's that led me to think of that theory =)
Just please please be sure that when you get involved with someone, be upfront in the beginning about revealing your relationship trends. If you notice or the female informs you she's getting serious feelings for you, distance yourself as soon as possible.
My friend told me it breaks his heart when he's had to watch some of his close girl-friends develop feelings and end up crying over him :/
Unfortunately, I also fell for him, Hard. He's still my best pal though =)
2007-08-20 02:17:51 · answer #3 · answered by Twinker 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's possible that you don't know how to have a real relationship.
If you can't be faithful, then don't have serious relationships.
It doesn't sound like you want to change the habit. You're a human being, not a animal.
We all control and make our own decisions. Temptations will come, but you have to decide if your relationship is more important.
Sex is sex...It comes and goes.
In life, we have to decipher what we want and how we want to live it.
You have to choose what's more important. Giving into temptation, or building a true life with someone?
Hope you figure it out.
2007-08-20 02:04:15 · answer #4 · answered by darkening_hope 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Buddy! You are a MALE! You are also an extremely honest male! Most guys think the same way you do - however most guys get so roped in by women (pussy whipped), that by the time they want to get out, they can't imagine what life is like without their significant other!
Nothing in life tells you that you HAVE to settle down - its a myth propagated by society and religion! Go out and have fun. If your still the same way when your 50, good luck to you - most of your buddies will be divorced and looking enviously at you anyway. the ones still married will be nothing but a shell of their former selves!!
2007-08-20 02:10:00 · answer #5 · answered by dazza1422000 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
you sound just like me but of the opposite sex... i eventually outgrew it married a wonderful man and not that it never crosses my mind to cheat or leave but the fact that i do neither is almost 4 years is a step up wayyy up. So i would say when the right one comes along your ways will change
2007-08-20 02:02:32 · answer #6 · answered by Amy M 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I happen to believe that one a cheater and a liar, always a cheater and a liar. Try short term relationships with people of your caliber. Then no one gets hurt.
2007-08-20 02:06:31 · answer #7 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stay out of long term relationships.
2007-08-20 02:00:55 · answer #8 · answered by mamabear 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Monogamy isn't for you so what. If you don't want it, and from your behavior you clearly don't, and you're happy with out it, judging from your behavior you are otherwise you wouldn't behave this way, you're fine.
Just don't lead women on thinking that they're going to get married to you or have your babies. Let them know you're never getting married.
2007-08-20 02:05:08 · answer #9 · answered by skunk pie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. You've made the first and most important step - recognition that there is a problem. Seek counseling to assist you in correcting your problems.
2007-08-20 02:04:12 · answer #10 · answered by wry humor 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋