im thinking of coming out but i dont know how to tell all my firnds and girlfriend??
2007-08-19 17:15:14 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Oh golly gosh what a pickle!
2007-08-19 17:22:12 · answer #1 · answered by sw_1304 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Like most of the other people on here, I would also say you need to tell her sooner than later. She will be extremely angry with you.
Please do NOT think that knowing if you're gay involves having sex with a man.
Aside from that, you can't really definitively know you're gay... Sexuality is a very gray-area subject. There are not very many absolutes. The best way to know is if you desire to be in a relationship with a man. Sexuality is not all about sex. Many people make that mistake. Sexuality is sex, but includes attraction and love and so many other things.
You'll have to think about that and decide what you want before you decide to tell her.
2007-08-19 21:07:07 · answer #2 · answered by Zhongwen xue sheng 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you love her romantically or do you love her as a friend? It could be that you're going through a phase right now. It depends though on how long you've thought you might be gay, if you liked the physical intimacy in your relationship with her, and if you're attracted to the same sex.
If you're not 100% sure, don't call it off yet. Instead, you might want to talk to her about it and see if she can help.
2007-08-19 17:34:37 · answer #3 · answered by mango lover. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did you have sex with her and like it ? If you did then you are a bi-sexual not a gay. Solve this question for yourself first.
On the other question: Do not come out bluntly about this. Withdraw from the girl slowly, if you don't want to be with her for the long term, like marriage or children. The same with telling others. Give hints first.
If you do want to stay with her, and you are bi-sexual,
AVOID telling her. Keep you needs for men discrete and un-promiscuous; that is seek a boy friend for your male relationship needs. Most women who go for bi-sexuals do not want to know about the "other sexuality", even if they say they do. They want to think of their man as "All Man"
this gives them happiness. Do not destroy a woman's happiness and you will be happy.
2007-08-20 07:40:39 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's a sucky situation, dude. Best just to get it over with and tell her. It's going to break her heart, but there's not use stringing her along. As far as HOW to tell your friends and girlfriend, that's a more tricky issue. There's no textbook way to come out of the closet. Be sincere, tell her you still care about her and love her...just not in 'that' way. At least with your friends you won't have that extra issue to deal with. Good Luck~
2007-08-19 17:25:27 · answer #5 · answered by Zaggy 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Better to do it now instead of later.
I'm not gay but I suspect that if you 'think' then you are.
You probably need to write a note to her and hand it to her when you tell her so she can read it later, since she probably won't remember much of what you say.
You have to think about this... your love for her isn't going to change in the least but everything will change for her. You should be prepared for that as well.
2007-08-19 17:21:36 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Get a grip! This is a lie of the devil! You are not gay.
Gays just don't pop up out of the ground.but evil thoughts do,with Satan's help!
Go kiss your girlfriend & tell her you are lucky to have her!
2007-08-19 17:36:39 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You must've doing a great job keeping it from her, or she's too dumb and stupid enough to sense it. Have you tried getting in her pants yet? If not after two years, no doubt you are a molly cuddle.
2007-08-19 17:31:20 · answer #8 · answered by Don S 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i once dated a guy who is charming and seemed to really love me. but he gave himself away bit by bit without realizing ive somehow noticed it. once, he was oogling at a bunch of guys playing basketball. had a lot of jokes about anal sex with his "guy" friends. (u gotta hear it then it'll raise ur eyebrows). and him wearing a tiny black trunk, sunbathing and a few men lusting at him. after we broke off, i finally had the courage to ask him. it was silence.
gross i tell u
2007-08-19 17:26:55 · answer #9 · answered by miss understand 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
We've all been there and survived. You can too.
6 steps to coming out:
http://www.4therapy.com/consumer/life_topics/article/7244/441/Coming+Out--6+steps+to+coming+out+of+the+closet+as+a+gay+person
more coming out resources (this one has more links): http://gaylife.about.com/od/comingout/Coming_Out.htm
2007-08-19 17:37:32 · answer #10 · answered by inactive account 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well to be with her you must have some hetrosexual feelings
and think about whether you really want to tell her that. She probably won't take that too kindly
2007-08-19 17:21:26 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋