I've done a lot of thinking lately about life. It seems the world is just one crazy mess. I have half a mind nowadays not to ever get married, have sex, have kids or anything. All the time I hear about all these couples getting divorces, remarried, having kids and either can't afford them or parents split up and the dad has to pay child support and allimony the rest of his life. The cost of everything keeps going up, but not my wages. If I never get married or have kids, I'd never have to worry about that. I'm not all that good looking anyhow, so why would anyone want to spend thier life with me. Maybe this explains why I've never even had my first kiss yet, and I'm 29 years old. There are also a lot of people (especially family members) that count on me to do everything for them. What would they ever do if I got married and moved away? Yes it gets deppressing all the time, but what is one to do?
2007-08-19 16:20:58 · 5 answers · asked by Driver4x4Truck 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
a lot of people chose not to have children this days. and if you don't find someone that you care enough to marry, don't have to marry either. but you may find that person that loves you and make life a lot easier for you, don't give up hope, and don't have to do anything you are not comfortable.
2007-08-19 16:33:11 · answer #1 · answered by Discovery 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, "driver", I don't blame you. I think a lot of people have the same talk with themselves as you have.
On the one hand, your logic is pretty accurate. You have a stable life - albeit a depressing one - and you have people who need you. Not half bad.
On the other hand, leading a single life is not healthy for a guy. Single guys have more illness, more disabilities, more legal problems, and a shorter life span. (Women seem to do better alone than we do.)
Here's a big secret: you don't need to be that 'good looking' to be interesting to women. But, you do have to be intelligent, witty, caring, aware, sensitive, self-confident, and positive. You can do something about all of that
If you are overweight, lose it. Get into shape physically and stop eating pork rinds, Cheetos, etc. Take care of yourself first.
Develop your spiritual side. Get involved in a local church or other religious group. Soak up some of the positivism there and working on shaping up your spirit.
You need a broader support group of friends than just your family members. Get in touch with old friends. Go to high school reunions.
You're still young. Have you thought about going back to school to get a degree? An advanced degree?
There are lots of possibilties out there that you may not have explored. But, the most important thing is to first build yourself up. Focus on your positive attributes and then add to them.
Whether you ever get married or not is up to you. To get a great wife, however, you have to be pretty great yourself. So, get going! With a little fine tuning, you can become pretty great in a relatively short time. Sharing your life is better than going it alone. And, there's nothing that can compare with the hug of your own child and a big "I love you, daddy!", I don't care how crazy the world is.
2007-08-20 00:22:19 · answer #2 · answered by SafetyDancer 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't let your looks or the examples of other failed relationships reflect on you. Those situations are not yours. There's a lot of things in life to get into and experience. It sucks to say this but when you're not looking for a relationship, that's when it happens. So concentrate on taking care of you. Whether that means improving your looks, travelling, new hobbies, etc. Ask yourself what's the one thing that you really would like to do but haven't done yet and that should motivate you. The more you keep yourself busy and doing things you really like and enjoy, you'll send off that vibe that attracts others to you. Not only that, you'll build that new circle of friends. All that will eventually lead to you meeting miss right and you'll know that you'll want to marry her. Start with step one and take care of yourself. As far as the family, deep down, they want to see you move on and be happy. If that means being married, moving on, having kids, its should hopefully bring the family closer and not have to rely on you so much but hopefully support you. Best of luck and keep a positive attitude.
2007-08-20 02:52:28 · answer #3 · answered by nvador1 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm 36 & still single-after dating my last 3 ex-gf's they taught me what a bad marriage can be like, esp. after living with one, so I'm happy staying single cause I'm not ready for marriage,-(I have to be 100% ready, find "mrs.right", live with her for a while so I can see how things go, etc. & be able to afford it too, esp. if I want kids-(more responsabilities, utilities to pay, etc.). anyways, you must be ready for it.
2007-08-19 23:38:43 · answer #4 · answered by strange-artist 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you joking!! Stop being so depressing. get out!! have fun!! Life is too short...
2007-08-19 23:29:13 · answer #5 · answered by Rosie_M 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋