A very horrible person! He's very negative, he's ammused in the expense of others. He's very racist! He hates me, because I'm not anything like him. Yesterday, he was talking about how we should hate god, becuase he's making so many hurricane, which might be the stupidest thing I ever heard. He's always yelling, is a very angry person, and can get aggresive. I don't talk to him at all, but he can't seem to stop talking about me, mostly negative thing to, actually only negative things. He refuses to get me baptise, he's very controlling with my mom, and threathens her all the time.
What can I do about this?
2007-08-19 13:09:40 · 31 answers · asked by West Jefferson Alum 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Other - Cultures & Groups
..and why do you think he so angry, could it have been his childhood?
2007-08-19 13:11:02 · update #1
I'm 16 BTW...and me and my dad, have gotten in a couple of fist fights.
2007-08-19 13:25:07 · update #2
my self esteem already in it's all time low!
2007-08-19 13:42:14 · update #3
Given that you have accurately described your situation, there is nothing you can do. Some may suggest counseling but he doesn't seem to be the type that would take that suggestion in anything resembling a favorable response.
You are 16, probably well on the way to 17. You have less than two years then you can leave and nobody can say anything about it. Hold out for that short period and avoid your father.
I just read the additional material. Physical abuse must not be tolerated. You and your mother should go to be police if he becomes abusive.
Good luck.
2007-08-19 13:30:08 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have found out something very curious. When I am mad with someone and all I really want to do is tear their hair out, if I can make myself pray that nice things will happen to them and that God will be good to them, it somehow makes the situation so much better - you could say that 'healing' has begun.
It's not easy. The last thing you want is nice things for them, but doing this has worked for me.
Can you make a special effort to pray for your Dad, for God to bless him? And after a week or two, see how much better things have become? Isn't it worth a try?
He threatens your mom, but she stays there - with your Dad, maybe it's all talk and no action. If you feel you are in danger, tell someone, perhaps a teacher at school
2007-08-19 13:20:17 · answer #2 · answered by bluebell 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bad childhood or not, there's no excuse for his behavior. If he is physically abusive, the advice that you and your mom put some distance between yoursellves and him is a good one.
Hang in there. I've been where you are.
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A PS as I think some more about this - At this point it doesn't matter why your father is the way he is. What matters is that you and your mother deal with the situation, as it is NOW. There's plenty of time for the pop psychology after the two of you are safe.
Be safe!!!
2007-08-19 13:14:08 · answer #3 · answered by Q&A Queen 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
he is a sad man. more than likely he was in an abusive family. Just remember you are good and no matter what he says keep your faith. God does love you and you know that. stay safe, if he hurts you or your mom call the police. all you can do for now is stay away from him when you get 18 you can move out. and probably befor then if it gets bad. lots of love
2007-08-19 13:20:07 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like your father is fighting a personal demon and taking it out on others.
He is obviously angry at god for some reason, maybe his short comings in life, who knows?
What religion are you son and how old? If you wanted to go to your local church and speak to a member of the clergy that is one step.
A 1 on 1 talk with your mother about him is another step. God does not control the weather in this world but teaches a lesson about how we come together during a tragedy such as a flood, mine disaster, tsunami, etc..
Or perhaps sit down with him man to man, I don't know how old you are, and ask him why he is the way he is.
Good luck.
2007-08-19 13:19:54 · answer #5 · answered by Derek B 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think you need to talk to someone in authority where you life. The police, minister, school councilor, teacher, other family menbers--someone you trust and can give you some advice. Do not talk to the police or anyone in his presence. You and your mother need to get out of that atmosphere. If he harms either of you physically--call the police, if possible. I am so sorry you and your mother have to deal with this. He needs professional help--for his mental instability and anger. Good Luck.
2007-08-19 13:19:39 · answer #6 · answered by old_woman_84 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
wow sorry you have to go through this, my dad was the same way he died when i was 14 and i was convinced my thoughts made me kill him because i was always thinking how i wanted him to go away and never come back.He verbally abused us but sometimes i just wish he would hit us cause i was tired of getting yelled at! Listen you are nothing like him and dont ever second guess yourself you see how he is and you dont want to be like him at all!! Maybe your mom needs to evaluate her relationship with him? Other then that stay strong because before you know it you will be out on your own and you wont have to deal with this but just remember you dont have to be like him you are your own person maybe if its possible get counsiling for yourself! GOOD LUCK
2007-08-19 13:19:53 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's his upbringing and perspective. Sometimes people aren't happy unless they're mad. It's a sad thing to say, but true.
Just because he turned out that way, doesn't mean that you have to. Already, you know the difference between right and wrong. Remember also that most bully's are cowards. Hope that helps.
2007-08-19 13:15:02 · answer #8 · answered by Zipperhead 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My dads a murderer, count yourself lucky. To be honest he seems a bit like your dad, controlling and agressive. He was a manic depressive and needed anger management, both of which he has unfortunately passed onto me. in prison he sees a psychologist who seems to think it was something to do with his childhood, so maybe youre right there about yours. When my dad got angry i just left the house to get away from everything, i didnt know what he was doing and i tried not to think of it. i didnt talk to him in case he would take something i said the wrong way. i dont really know anything else for you to do because thats just what i did. i just wanted you to know i know what youre going through and its not nice. if you need someone to talk to im more than happy to talk back. good luck
2007-08-19 13:24:42 · answer #9 · answered by Shane Kirk. 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
To try to explain your Dad's behavior to you, without knowing him, is almost impossible. Some people go through life, in a state of perpetual anger, due to their not fulfilling or achieving what they know they might have been. For others it might have been due to what they saw their parents do as they were growing up. We all learn what our roles should be from our parents, and most kids grow up wanting to be "just like" Mom or Dad.
2007-08-19 13:21:58 · answer #10 · answered by Beau R 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋