How do i tell my dad?

Question

How do i tell my dad hes putting work before family. Schools getting ready to start and i benn asking him4 a mounth i need new school clothes when can we go.. i aways get in a week in a day now its a few days before school no supplies no new clothes hes putting work brfore me.. so know when i g2 the store nothing will really be there he did it last year too.. He also doesnt do anything beacuse hes aways working he never does nothing with me and my brother anymore.

I would ask my mom buttt.. my life sucks and so does hers... shes a pot head sorry but its the truth and she anit gonna help mmmmmeeeeeeeeee

Answer 1

My sympathies go out to you for how much your heart is crying out for attention. why don't you print out this question and the answers you have received and show it to your father. Maybe seeing the pain you are feeling written down will have more impact then just trying to tell him. It's amazing how much power there is in the written word.

Answer 2

just tell him straight out. but don't say it in a whiny teen voice or he'll just think its a teenage thing. but if he is really doing what you say then it will damage your relationship. sit him down and just tell him that you truly feel that he cares more about his work than you. tell him you feel that family should always come before anything. open his eyes to things he maybe never payed attention to before. um i don't really know what elso to say but i hope this helps some..

Answer 3

y dont u ask a close family friend of yours to help you get your clothes etc...
and why dont u sit down and talk to him nicely and ask him if anything's been bothering him lately...
or just tell him how you feel and how its affecting you

Answer 4

I would ask your Grandparents or your aunts or a really close Friend.
If I knew you- I would let you go with me.....
But really- I'm so sorry for you. But really I would ask a realitave.
But I would try talking with your dad- or talk to your grandparents and have them talk to your dad for you.
Good luck!
PS: If you ever need some one to talk to- please message me! I'll be there for you! :)

Answer 5

Why is this in rock and pop?

Plus, can't you ask your mother or something? Unless you don't have one...?

Answer 6

this isn't a pop/rock question. just save money or bother your dad

Answer 7

I was in a very similar situation to you when I was growing up except my Dad was an alcoholic.He never beat us thankfully,which I am very grateful for.Everything he did for us was materialistic and I can honestly say that I do not have the memories I should have with my Dad.I envied all my friends and how they did things with their dads when growing up.

There are a few things you can do:
1.you and your brother sit him down with your mum and explain your feelings to them both.
2.you and your brother sit down with his very best friend and explain it to them,so he/she can say it to him.Try and make sure its not one of his work colleagues.
3.Embarass him in public into what kind of a father he is,whether it be at his job or other place he considers his refuge.
4.Write him or both your parents a letter with everything you feel,absolutely everything-do not let anything go amiss.All your anger,all your hate and how you feel about him.If your brother is feeling the same let him write a seperate letter.Then you go to the post office and you mail it to your Dads office or your home.

Often with the 1st scenario you can forget to say things that you meant to say and it can just turn out like the same events before, that you have had with your Dad.Its a good idea to write out what you would like to say to him and then you and your brother practice, so you know how to handle the situation.

The 2nd scenario needs to be done at your Dads' best friends house.Ring him/her up and ask them to keep it secret from your Dad,that its something important that you want to discuss with them.Again,write out what you wish to say and practice it. Meet them at their house or ideally a local coffee shop or even Burger King.Explain how you feel and how you are gradually becomng a memory within your fathers life.

The 3rd scenario is a bit drastic,but its better than living in misery.There isn't a person alive male or female who doesn't dread being embarassed in front of their friends and neighbours or relations.I suggest you bring your brother along with you when you do this.Whether it be embarassing him into getting you the clothes needed for school along with supplies.

I will give an example of this.My Dad got into a habit of calling my mum "Mam" particularily in public.One night they were in a local pub with all their friends.My Mum got up to get a drink and my Dad shouted out "Mam-another for me aswell".My Mum at the top of her voice shouted out."Whats that son-you want another drink-sure you're too young to be drinking-this is what you need".With that she handed him a soother and stuck it into his mouth".Everyone in the pub burst out laughing and he went red as a tomato!..He never called her Mam again!

The 4th scenario is probably the best out of all the options for the future.It may take you a few days to write all that you feel inside,but you need to think about everything.All the times your Dad let you down.How you no longer feel like his son and in a few years you will be a stranger to him.Don't hold back on anything.After mailing it,do not approach on whether he received or not.To make sure its delivered you could drop it into the company letterbox with the stamp after hours.

If it remains unchanged after about 2 weeks-ask him to sit down with you.Then ask him did he receive and what he felt when he read the letter.Work from there.

You may feel very vulnerable at the moment due to all thats happening,but believe me when I say there a millions of us out there who end up being stronger because of our independency while growing up.This is no excuse,but it is good to know you are not alone.

You are now experiencing an emotion of emptiness and there will be day you will experience fullness and love.There is a very good episode of The Simpsons in which Bart is looked after by another father and the guilt Homer feels when he sees what he is missing out on.A son or a daughter is a gift to any parent because it is a part of them.They have together made that person-unlike their brothers and sisters and uncles and aunts.

Remember-your whole life is ahead of you and no matter what way your Dad treats you or your brother,you will be able to learn from the experience and ensure that YOU are there for YOUR son or daughter when the time comes.You will know to never let work get in the way of your OWN family.

Maybe your Dad never experienced what it was like to be ignored within a family unit.Along with that you will be able to experience the love from a partner many times before you get married.You will be able to grow up to be anything you want to be and have beautiful children of your own.

Make as many mates (male and female) as you can-pick the best ones to be your friends whom you share everything with.Get involved with Sports and volunteer work at events that interest you and your friends.Maybe you and your friends are old enough to start mowing lawns,washing cars,gardening for neighbours to gain good pocket money.If none of the above scenarios work out-your friends will be your foundation.If they let you down-pick yourself back up again,because again-thats how we learn.

Stay away from all drugs-they will make you forget the wonderful experiences ahead and turn you into a person who is unable to function and experience emotions.

When you fall in love for the first time,the second time.When you achieve something in school or on a sportsground.You may even have an aunt or uncle whom you can share your great experiences with if your father is not there.Invite your Aunt or uncle or all your relations to these events.Someday your Dad will wake up and realise the mistakes he has made or someone will tell him.Never think you are out of options.A problem shared is a problem halved.

I don't know what country you are in,but they are plenty of organisations you can call if you are lonely or feeling down.Never feel ashamed about asking for help when you need it.As the saying goes "fools always think they know everything-that why they are called fools".

I hope I have helped....everything will work out fine even if the above scenarios fail.You are in control of your destiny-no one else.As Freddie Mercury of Queen said "you can be anything you want to be-just turn yourself into anything you think that you could ever be-be true to yourself-be free,be free-"

Chow