Is my husband cheating on me again?

Question

I'm confused in my marriage. I'm not sure what to do next. :(
My husband cheated on me before we married. (That girl told me that your BF was chating on you with me) He said he wont do it if I forgive him and give him second chance. Which I did. A year later we married, and moved away to another state. We have been married a year and 2 months now. I'm still thinking: Will he cheat one me again? b/c I still feel hurt from his first cheat.
We dont really have alot of sex. once a month or so.=/ It is not I dont want to. It is he always feel tired from his work. We dont talk about our mind or feeling to each other either. Is that normal to married people? You lost interests in each other after married?
Now He is away for some business. He is not answering his phone when I called. He would call back after it. He goes bed at 10pm.(we usually dont go to bed until 11 or 12)
What should I do? I want to believe him, But I dont want to get some disease either if he lies to me again.

He is on heavy pain killers for 2 years. Maybe pain killer makes him not to want sex. We used to have alot of sex before he used heavy pain killers.

Answer 1

First of all, forget that saying 'Once a cheater always a cheater'; in some instances that is true; in others it is not.

He may be having an affair - and you need to sit him down and talk to him, not with anger - blame and all that - just that you want to share your thoughts and what you are thinking.

I would also check his cell phone and email; those who have nothing to hide, hide nothing. Don't sit back and be passive, take some action to find out the truth.

Answer 2

Unless he has high blood pressure, or is being treated for high blood pressure, sex only once a month or so is unusually small amount of sex for a new married couple. Has sex been this bad for you even at the beginning of your marriage?

You didn't say what kind of work he does, but it still doesn't sound normal.

In reality, you should NOT have married him when you did since you were NOT over the hurt from his prior cheating on you.

It does sound highly suspicious that he's not answering his phone now that he's on a business trip. You married him because you wanted to believe him, but you didn't believe him then either.

I cannot tell you what to do about him, but I do think you should go to a marriage counselor on your own to discuss your marital problems and decide what to do.

Answer 3

you never got over the hurt the first time and I don't think you were fully satisfied with the way things were handled in the beginning and now its coming back to haunt you. You don't need to be a private investigator to figure out this man is cheating on you. YES he is cheating and you know why because he has changed his habbits.....he tells you he is going to bed at 10 pm and you know that when he is home he goes to be at 11 or 12 and he doesn't answer the phone....there is something going on. Sometimes not always, a leopard doesn't change his spots, this man is cheating on you so now what are you going to do...wallow in regret or do something about it.. ask yourself is this marriage worth saving if so you need to take the appropriate steps and get the ball rolling. If this marriage is not worth saving-save yourself the grief and get a plan in action to move out and take care of yourself but be smart about whatever you do. I am married and I love my husband and I am not quick to tell people to divorce I don't believe in it......my question to you is......is it worth it or not and if so, don't let that woman steal your man, get up and get him back but he has cheated in the past and he is CHEATING now....is it worth it.....if not move on and get yourself together and find out how you want to live and only allow people in your life that can help you attain that. good luck

Answer 4

Their are so many women out there who are going though the same thing--I was one of them the best thing to do is have a talk with him get all your feelings out on the table--after you say your part and you hear what he has to say then make a deal with him -------tell him you what to keep your marriage together but theirs some thing he has got to do with you make a doctors appointment and be checked if he seems upset with the ideal and repeats that you don't trust him then i believe you do have some thing to worry about-- and if he goes along with it act like you have some one watching him have a friend call when hes home then act like its a call from some one that you have watching him the ice will break trust me it worked for me----i have been divorce for 22 years.

Answer 5

Sounds like something is going on. You guys need to be communicating better and also having sex more than once a month. You need to talk to your husband and see where he wants to go from there. Confront him with your fear of him cheating and try your best to see if he's lying.

Answer 6

Call his office. Tell them you want to send flowers to his hotel room. Ask them for the address to the hotel so you can have them sent to him. He is away on business right??? Someone there should know where he is???

I will bet they won't have a clue as to what you are talking about. If they do..........find out if this is the hotel they have a contract with........if it is he should always stay there right???? The next business trip how about you "meet" him there??? He should have no reason to get mad......y'all are married right????

If y'all are bumping uglies only once a month...........nuff said

Answer 7

marriage counseling.....If you want your marriage to work then you need outside help to forgive him to be able to trust him and you need skills to talk with each other better. Marriage is a two way street.

Answer 8

Once a cheater always a cheater. Move on you deserve better.

Answer 9

Pain pills is not the answer here I see a red flag waving here.

Answer 10

Hate to be negative here, but a leapord can't change it's spots.

Oncea a cheater, always a cheater.