I've been married for 3 years now and my husband and I keep separate checking accounts. I dont know how much he makes and he doesnt know how much I make. He pays the mortgage and all the bills and I buy the groceries and pay my own personal bills (the ones he doesn't know I have). Do you think this is healthy? We dont argue over money so I think it's ok, but I'm curious what others think.
2007-08-18 19:21:50 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
if it ain't broken don't fix it. sounds like you have it working for you. but anything that is in your name as well as his should be of concern to you as it will affect your credit rating if he doesn't pay on time.
2007-08-18 19:28:18 · answer #1 · answered by jezbnme 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It would not work for me at all, but if it works for you....
I'm curious to know what you do about savings? Is that all separate too?
How do neither of you know what the other makes? Do you file your taxes separate too?
I don’t know how much your mortgage and other bills are, but if he's paying ALL those and all you pay for is groceries (as far as household expenses), that seems a little lop-sided to me (our grocery bill is only a small percentage of our other bills)..unless he makes A LOT more money. I can’t believe he’s never questioned the fairness of it.
2007-08-19 02:51:07 · answer #2 · answered by kp 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i understand bein in a relationship and not sharing financial info but once u get married u should be able to share that info and not judge each other. i have been dating my bf for 2 years and we do not share checking accounts but we know what we both make and we share the bills 50/50. whatever works for u guys is fine but i do not think it is good to hide bills from each other. what if he finds out down the road? but at the same time u guys seem to have some sort of agreement not to share finances. and some couples end up breaking up over finances and so if this works for u then keep it up. whatever works works.
2007-08-19 02:27:03 · answer #3 · answered by Just Wondering 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The real question is, does it work for YOU BOTH? - Your comment that you never argue over money suggests that it does work. And money is one of the biggest reasons couple fight and break-up.
My Ex-wife and I did the same as you and it eventually helped kill our marraige because neither one of us trusted each other. So, I suggest that while you both may be cool with the current financial arraingment, that you figure out a fair percentage of each of your incomes to go to a mutual savings account for BOTH of you to make a personal choice of what to do with it. After all, you are in a partnership.
2007-08-19 02:30:51 · answer #4 · answered by Republican on Dope 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If it works for you then go for it. If you had joint accounts you may find it easier to save money and work towards financial goals together. My husband and I have had a joint account since before we were married because he works and I raise my daughter so I need to use the money more often anyway. My friend and her partner have seperate accounts because she says she cant trust him to leave money in there for essentials and because he is hopeless with money so it really depends on the couple. Having joint accounts works well for my family : )
2007-08-19 02:31:16 · answer #5 · answered by SmEllY! 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You only think that you have separate finances. Marriage made you responsible for his mistakes and him responsible for yours. If something happens they will go after both of your accounts. You are not separated in the eyes of the world or the law. The only separation you have is with the only one who should be united with you in goals and aspirations. Sharing can be a real bonding agent.
2007-08-19 02:32:08 · answer #6 · answered by noyoungun 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course it is, marriage is to share everything. You should have one joint account, where all money is deposited and all bills are paid out from. What you describe is just SO sad - like you are leading separate lives... and that's not much of an intimate marriage.
2007-08-19 10:53:34 · answer #7 · answered by Lydia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make sure that you both have wills and a power of attorney so that if something happens to one of you, the other can get into the bank accounts to clear up debts and such. Other than that, if it works for you it works for you. But my wife wouldn't hear of it. We do each have checking accounts but we each have access to the other's accounts and I know what she makes and she sees my check stub every payday. Again, each of you needs access to the other's accounts (especially his since he pays the bills) in case of catastophe.
2007-08-19 03:00:59 · answer #8 · answered by baseballdad69 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey, if you don't argue about money, be happy. Do what works for you and hubby. Don't worry about what the rest of us think. More and more couples are agreeing to just the same type of financial relationship that you and your husband have.
2007-08-19 02:29:08 · answer #9 · answered by jules 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nope...we do the same thing..It works for us...we have our own money...I have bills I pay for and he has bills he pays for but we both end up with our own money and buy what we want for ourselves or the house out of our own money.
its works just nicely and we never EVER argue about money.
2007-08-19 03:07:54 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should always have your own. If I let my husband know what I have he would try and spend every dime. It works for you so I wouldn't worry about it. He is paying the mortgage, I say GOOD!
2007-08-19 02:45:51 · answer #11 · answered by moonchild 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋