I Dont know if Iam in love with my brother in law Please Help!!!!?

Question

Well I've known my brother in law for 5 years and lately in the past few months I have found myself having these feelings that I have never felt before I love my husband so much we have been threw alot together and he is my bestfriend I will never give him up for anything in the world but I dont know what to do with myself I just get really funny feelings when he is near me and I try so hard to not listen to those feelings but sometimes I wish that he can just grab me and kiss me but then I think about it and fight with that urge I been trying so hard not to let him know about it I guess thats what I should do just keep it to myself I dont want to ruin the only thing thats good in my life Please can anyone say anything to help me feel better Thanks

Answer 1

I know how you feel too because I am also in love with my brother in law. I have been in love with him for over a year now. I got the same fears you've got, trying to stay away from him but wanting him to grab me kiss me sometimes too. There was a time where I felt like he was in love with me too and he would flirt more with me but never said a word about how we felt for each other. Sometimes you don't even need to talk, you just know. I think he never made a move out of respect to his brother even I know he was tempted and so was I. But I also feel like you, I love my husband and wouldn't want to hurt him. Anyway, the feeling of being in love with him was really strong in the beginning and I could not stop thinking of him and it was horrible, I just could not keep him out of my mind! However, after a year the feeling started to fade and I stopped thinking constantly about him. I feel so much better now that I don't feel the urge of seeing him or knowing how he is that much. I still think about him, some days more than others and I still love him but I, at least, feel like I can live my life so much peacefully. I am sure this is what will happen to you. Be strong, it's true that time will heal even though you will probably always love him. Good luck!

Answer 2

Physical attraction can happen anytime, anywhere, so don't beat yourself up too much about it. What counts is what we do about. It sounds like you are doing all the right things to avoid trouble and heartbreak for your husband. But you need to try even harder. Is your brother in law married? Maybe has a girlfriend? If so, getting to know the woman he loves and learning to care about her as a friend will definitely make you think twice before doing anything to hurt her.
Spend more time focusing on your husband and your love life. Try new things, rebuild the passion if it not as strong as it once was. Get so involved in your love and desire for your husband that you forget about his brother. Also think about how you would feel if your husband was lusting after your sister? Or other close relative if you don't have sisters.

Answer 3

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You are not wrong. My sister in law (husband's sister) has had a lot of miscarriages.. some miraculously overlap the last pregnancy. Anyways~ she would be more fertile if she lost 90 pounds. The whole thing is a pity ploy. Anyways~ after I had my second child she was getting ready to ask me to carry a baby for her. So I looked into a long term birth control (I was looking into Implanon) and my doctor suggested an IUD.. So I got it before she had a chance to ask. That way I had a great reason to fall back on ("It hurt so much getting it~ I don't want to get it out anytime soon..") Problem with my situation is.. they have already proven they can't raise kids. The daughter she does have has issues no child should have.. and the partying they have going on.. I am 99% certain that little girl has been molested (due to behaviors and knowledge no small child should have had.).. and here I practically had that little girl for 5 years except over nights (although, she spent the night 2 times a week most of the time). (I also now~ do not take care of her at all. which I prefer because she brought issues with my own kids).. Anyways~ obviously~ they aren't cut out for parenthood. I am not equipped emotionally to hand over a child I carried for 9 months and birthed. If you know you aren't equipped either~ good. That is your body and your limits. I would never hand a baby over to someone who had 2 abortions either. If there were a medical issue that warranted the abortions she would be referring to them as miscarriages. Nobody with a maternal bone her body would refer to a medically necessary abortion as an abortion~ she *would* call it a miscarriage because it would be devastating to her. It's your body. You call the shots. Your husband should take the heat here for you. My husband did for me. He went and told them all that there is no way he could let me have someone else's child and *he* said NO. I thank him for that because honestly~ I would have been put in an unfair position to have to explain my view. Your husband needs to step up and take some of this heat seeing how it is HIS family and all. And they are all out of line. The fact that you can't give away a baby~ even to a family member~ even if it is her egg and his sperm and still technically not yours~ is absolutely YOUR choice and nobody should take it on themselves to manipulate you. Tell them to go adopt an unwanted child if they want one so bad. (Which is what my sister in law is trying to do~ and quite frankly~ they haven't made the cut as adoptive parents.. for a reason.) Tell her to go talk to her doctor about having a child~ Quite frankly.. repeated abortions *are* harmful to your reproductive system and *does* cause damage. There are fertility treatments they can do, so long as she has eggs and he has sperm there is something the doctor can do to help them conceive. If they can't afford the treatments.. maybe they can't afford a child either.

Answer 4

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RE:
I Dont know if Iam in love with my brother in law Please Help!!!!?
Well I've known my brother in law for 5 years and lately in the past few months I have found myself having these feelings that I have never felt before I love my husband so much we have been threw alot together and he is my bestfriend I will never give him up for anything in the world but I...

Answer 5

Just because you are married, doesn't mean you won't be tempted by many men. It is the sin called lust and if you keep letting yourself feel this way you may just commit adultery. Sounds like you already have in your own mind. Best to never be around your brother in law alone. Avoid that situation at all costs. Stay away from him as much as possible. Put your focus back on your own husband, let only him intoxicate you.

Answer 6

my dear lady, u r married now and there are lots of responsibilities on ur shoulders. u r having a great famaly a loving husband and a great future ahead u. but i dont know y r u having these feeling abt ur brother in law? may be it is becos of ur lonelyness or anything else. it is not bad to search for love but the love u r talking abt is not frm the right source the consequenses can be very hurtfull for u,for ur husband, for ur famaly and also for ur brother in law. i suggest u to curb those feelings inside and be responsible towards ur famaly which includes tht brother in law. try to make urself busy in work and famaly and then u will get what u truely deserve" love frm ur husband andrespect in the famaly " best of luck lady have a great life.

Answer 7

Chances are you felt the same way about your husband when you met him. His brother is probably similar, however different. I would tell my husband about it. I tell him everything that is the only way we get through things. Talk about it, it makes it not a secret, it opens up a line of communication that will allow him to help you through it. He probably won't like it much, however he will feel closer to you if you open up.

Answer 8

Sounds like what you're feeling is sexual attraction to this person. We're human, and it's normal to have these feelings about someone we are close to. But what you have to do is to not act on them, or put yourself in a position that might get you into to trouble.

Answer 9

i wouldnt say anything unless you knew he felt the same way, he's just an in-law but it could still cause family problems. so either way it cant end perfectly. thats a bad situation from anyway you look at it. ide just try to wait it out and maybe it'll all go away

Answer 10

I know how you feel; i feel the same way about my sister in law. First question is..do you think he feels the same way? If you don't think so, but stay away. The worst thing that can happen is you say something, or make a move, he's not interested, he tells your hubby....you see where i'm going. But if you think he is interested.....then find some way to talk with him about it, make sure you are both on the same page. If so, I say go for it. you only live once.