If anyone has done this how was it after the deal with your spouse and friend? Wierd or ok?? We have been married for 11 years and are very open minded and our friend is a life long friend. We just dont want any problems after the thing YA Know!
2007-08-18 15:24:02 · 18 answers · asked by parents of 2 girls 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I would suggest finding a descreet third party - not a life long friend - it becomes too awkward.
I was asked once to participate in a threesome with a couple and I declined - even that changed the friendship forever.
2007-08-18 15:31:57 · answer #1 · answered by geminijeanna 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In every person has different opinion! I respect them either.
But for my personal point of view, you have to consider some factors.
1. How open you are with your husband and vice ver sa? Do you feel any jealousy since your marriage life? How deep your understanding to each other? Do you have control your self being in-love with the prospect after the sex session? How about your hubby, did he has self control after this session to respect your marriage and love will be there? Is the prospect third person had high respect to your family relationship as wife and husband?
2. You have to consider also the consequencies if the prospect best friend is a guy to inpregnated you? Or if the prospect is a girl, what if your hubby inpregnated her? Not unless all three of you are protected? But even protected nobody can assure 100 % accurate?
3. Suppose the aftermath of the sex session and found the third person has better performance and either of you spouse wanting more to be more frequent session, or the third party wanting more for sex with either of you spouse how do you limit him/her appearance without hurting him/her?
4. Is your friendship to the prospect third person has no limit and restriction from you and your spouse to see each other and your relationship as husband and wife can not be endanger to be broken the 11 years you hardly established?
If these factors have been considered and already studied and ready to face all consequencies, then go a head invite the third party best friend! There is advantage to this long friend because you feel confortable specially you knew each other for a long time that your secrete are never been opened up!
today is new generation! I know how full of thrills and excitements you and spouse having fun with your best friend prospect! Sex other than our spouse has something can not be explained? The variety is something we had asking for when a long marriage going to fade the fires and love magnet between the two couples did.
For those who has negative idea, I respect them. For me, I can say every person has the right to enjoy his/her life as long as their is mutual understanding between the two couples to enhance their sex life with out harming, offending and destroying other people's life.
2007-08-19 05:14:47 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This question comes up about once a week. The answer is, absolutely don't do it. What if you get pregnant and your husband isn't the father? What if the other guy sues for custody? What if you end up catching herpes? Do you really think your marriage will be more stable because of this? Usually people that write in here say it caused the marriage to spiral apart.
The really big question is something you left out. Do you have kids? If you do, why did you leave that out? They are the ones who will be most affected by what you do, and the effect will be devastation. What happens if they walk in on your little freak show? And yes, stuff like that is a freak show. You are well into sexual deviant territory with that one. So, are you going to go ahead and risk turning your kids' lives upside down, like so many selfish adults do, or what?
Kent in SD
2007-08-18 22:36:14 · answer #3 · answered by duckgrabber 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know someone that did this very thing and it not only ruined the friendship but also the marriage.
It seems that Hubby 2 was much better in bed than hubby 1....... wife 2 hated sex with hubby 1 while wife 1 had a killer time with hubby 2..... after this nobody wanted sex with hubby 1.....see the problem? Either way whether it is a threesome or a foursome if one lover is better than the other the only thing that can come from it is hurt feelings.
2007-08-18 22:38:25 · answer #4 · answered by ♥♥♥MiSSY♥♥♥ 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Trying something new in the bedroom is a normal thing for couples. But inviting a close friend to something like this is a recipe for disaster. Changes are that one of the three will feel hurt after wards and that will put pressure on either your marriage or your friendship.
It will be much better to use toys in your sex life then real 3rd party human beings.
However, if you both are willing to take that gamble go for it but don't blame the other if your marriage breaks up afterward.
2007-08-18 22:35:08 · answer #5 · answered by Ed 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I think you would be much wiser by placing a personal ad and doing this with someone you don't have an existing friendship with. You're bound to feel awkward afterward with a friend and there is a much bigger chance of jealousies arising. But it all depends on the personalities involved. If you're all very open minded and non possessive, you may just be able to pull this off.
2007-08-22 15:14:38 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Married 11yrs and very open and want a third
party in bed with you. Evidentally you know nothing
about marriage and what it is all about, shame on
you, go ahead enjoy and when the problems
start coming in because you got another person
involved in your marriage life, then one day you
will have realized it it not right and wrong and then
it will be too late. Goodness gracious...!!!!!!
2007-08-18 22:58:37 · answer #7 · answered by RudiA 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
PLEASE DO NOT DO THIS......... I can tell you from experience, that once you bring another human being into the bed with you its going to change things forever. Unless your relationship is made of stone, I give you a year to a year and a half and you will be seperated from this and they will not be friends anymore. Please listen. Have been there done that. My relationship is going down the tubes now do to that same mistake. Good luck to you.
2007-08-19 13:40:03 · answer #8 · answered by missy j 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are you insane? How can this be healthy for a marriage or a friendship?? This is infidelity, adultery, betrayal....someone will get hurt. You can pretend all day long that it is just physical or sexual, but emotions will get involved.
2007-08-22 16:34:52 · answer #9 · answered by CuitePie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My sister did this, the problems was that the person kept wanting to involved in their everyday life, they had to move.
2007-08-18 22:36:38 · answer #10 · answered by Ellen B 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋