Do you think a Wal-Mart greeter would be good lawn art?

Question

Due to complaints, I got rid of my Lawn Jockey, and something is missing. You know, that personal touch and an extension of welcome to my humble abode.

Answer 1

I think you should wait for a while. Wait until the holiday season rolls around again, and then you can easily drive slowly by any Kmart or WalMart reach out and snatch up a Salvation Army Bell Ringer!

After the holidays, and the New Year rolls in, you can easily exchange his out fits for New Years Day festivities complete with multi-colored balloons to drop at midnight.

THen there will be St Patricks Day - dress him in green with shamrocks and watch him dance a little Irish Jig while still ringing his bell!

Valentines Day-- dress him in a cupid and exchange the bell this time for a bow and arrows. I think you have the Idea for now, just use your imagination and let it be your guide!
I know it's hard to live without your lawn Jockey right now, but if you can wait for a few more months and it really wont be too long, there will be plenty of bell ringers out there to choose from. You don't want to settle for anything less Right now, even if your heart is heavy. good things come to those that wait and not to those who hesitate

Answer 2

No the Walmart greeters are generally pretty ugly and old do u really want an ugly old and/or retarded person hanging out on ur front lawn? This is not the way you want to welcome people into your home. Try a little person wearing a ball gag and a harness I'd come over for sure.

Answer 3

And just what did people complain about when you had your Lawn Jockey? They are real collector's items.

"These statues were used as markers on the Underground Railroad throughout the South into Canada," said historian/author Charles Blockson, curator of the Afro-American Collection at Temple University in Philadelphia. "Green ribbons were tied to the arms of the statue to indicate safety; red ribbons meant to keep going."

"People who don’t know the history of the jockey have feelings of humiliation and anger when they see the statue," he added. "But this figure which was sometimes used in a clandestine nature, and sometimes without the knowledge of the person who owned the statue, was a positive and supportive image to American-Americans on the road to freedom."

Sometime, added Blockson, a flag was put into the hand of the statue to indicate safety.

Answer 4

It would be a good way to thumb your nose at your neighbors. And also to show that you have a great sense of the ridiculous.
But there is always somebody who will complain unless your greeter is totally nondescript regarding race, age, gender, sexual orientation, politics, and religion.

Answer 5

You have lawn? I thought it was a bunch of washing machines and rabbit holes. Them critters make good target practice and a mighty fine Sunday stew.

Answer 6

a walmart greeter would do just fine. Once they die, and rigor mortise sets in, they'll be stiff and will do nicely on the front lawn.

Answer 7

How long can they stand on one leg? I love flamingos as lawn art.

Answer 8

Wal-mart! Wow! becareful though, I hear they are VERY pricey!

I am so envious of you though, I have never been in a Wal-mart, it looks far to classy for me

Answer 9

Only if they are allowed to wear balloon animal hats. They need a porta potty next to them as well.

Answer 10

that's the most fantastic idea I've heard in a long time...you could even put a blue light next to him for night time passer byers