Hi i am married and blessed with one son and with a wonderful wife, but?

Question

a 20 year girl who also knows that i am married is mad after me. I tried to convince that it wont go but she threatens that she will commit sucide. I dont to how to react ..... but i sympathise her but she is pulling my heart even. any coments or suggestions let me know

Answer 1

Sounds like emotional blackmail and if you fall for it you are just as bad. Pretend that the tables were turned and it was a 20 year old guy doing this to your wife. How would you like her to handle the situation? Fast forward a few decades and pretend this was your son and he was married and this was happening to him, what advice would you give to him? Be happy for what you have and cherish it, don't put it in jeopardy. Avoid all contact with her. She'll get over it.

Answer 2

You have obviously doe something for this youngster that she has taken te wrong way, maybe you have shown her some affection innocently and its bee somethingshe hasnt had at home, it is important you understand she will be lookng upon you as a fatherly figure but she wont understand that and will mistake it for love!
The best thing you can do is talk to your wife, explain youshowed a little time for her and now she has taken it thewrong way, you need to tell your wife to stop things becoming a blackmail situation,but you also need your wife to understand she is merely a child and she needs the right brush off in a kind but not hurt and rejecting kind of way. Talk things over with your wife and come to an understanding, maybe get you and your wife to sit together with a united front with the girl and explain that you are both happy to have her as a friend, but in light of recent events would rather she does not try to contact or befriend you alone without your wife present for obvious reasons.. she should take that well and get the message slowly but in a way that givesher time to get used to it, instead of breaking her heart and having to orry about what she will do next. good luck

Answer 3

some young girls only want what they cannot have. She knows you are married. The sad part is, if you werent married, she probably wouldnt want you. Its a game to see if she can get you. Do not give in. Cut off all contact with her. She sounds like she needs a lot of help. Report to someone what she is threatening. Tell your wife, that is very important. And rest assured, if she does commit suicide, which Im guessing she wont, that it IS NOT your fault.

Answer 4

If she is seriously threatening suicide she has some way bigger emotional/psychological issues going on.

She is manipulating you with this tactic. Either she knows you are a good guy who wouldn't want to see a young girl get hurt and is using this against you or she is honestly suffering from mental illness.

The next time you turn down her advances and she threatens to take her own life, call 911 and explain the situation. They will send someone to her home to evaluate her and protect her from herself. If she was serious about her suicide threat, you will have saved her life without risking your marriage. If she was bluffing, you will have put an end to her ability to manipulate you.

I used to work ambulance and believe me, this is not an uncommon situation. There were many times in my career I responded to just such a call.

You need to sever all ties with this person. I understand you want to be there for her, but having you in her life is only going to complicate things. You also need to fill your wife in on this situation if you haven't done so already.

Answer 5

She doesn't need you, she needs help from professionals. She doesn't love you, she's demanding you, and that isn't love. Her choices aren't your responsibility, but what YOU do IS. Going with her to prevent her perhaps killing herself doesn't justify what you'd be doing, but you need to make sure she really does get help, not only may she be suicidal, but she's starting to drag other people through it with her.

Actually, in response to *RE* f's question, I'd say that's taking it waaaaay too far. I'm kind of surprised her husband hasn't been physically hurt yet, not looking up while walking around and all. Merely letting your eyes fall on someone of the opposite sex isn't wrong, what you think when you look is what's a sin. Not looking is like curing the symptoms, not the illness.

Answer 6

you can't risk your family and self for someone like that. Who knows what she is capable of and you don't need that in your life with a family. I'm amusing your a lot older so just weed this girl out of your life. You can always call the police for a thirteen of suicide or get a restraining order. If you feel other wise then maybe you don't love your wife. Losing a marriage over something so immature is not worth it. Cut off all ties!

Answer 7

i'm sorry to say this bcoz probably u won't like this,but i think the fault is ur's,bcoz u r weak.If u were true in ur feeling of getting rid of her, u will surly find a way out.So first make ur mind.Think about ur wife and kid and may b alone or vid there help u will definitely find a solution.But just b strong,search ur soul and take a decision.sometimes decision taken at a particular moment may hurt or feel difficult to take but ultimately r for the betterment of ur loved ones and of course u.remember there r certain things in life which r done for the sake of others and they r still ur very own family.So i just pray to god that for the sake of ur family god helps u to take the rigth decision.Best of luck.

Answer 8

Gentle man
You are layer : you have been don some thing wrong with her may be love letters or some gifts yourself you started friendship with her since long time then that girl innocent she trusted you: may be you need illegal some thing pleasure from her may be she refused unless you marry her: after that may be you ignore her. In our country no any one girl not interested married person unless any male start the love with her.

In case of if you are innocent tell to your wife regarding this matter:

by
badar

Answer 9

A girl who threatens suicide like this is lying. But psychological profiling could put her as a dangerous person. Where she could stalk you and even try to come up with lies to tell your wife. What I would do is to tell her that you are not interested. That you love your wife and your child. And inform the local police.

Answer 10

Tell you wife about the plan so she doesn't freak out. Agree to go out with the 20 year old but when she meets up with you the police are there. Get her help or atleast a restraining order.

biha12