Married to a soldier, what do you do to keep from getting depressed, while your soldier is gone?

Question

I was deployed the same time he was last time, but this time I will be home with our newborn and am worried I will go crazy or get depressed.

Gee...I would like to thank the most of you for making me feel like a mound of cow dung...you think I would be worried about myself if I didnt have a baby to take care of? NO I would be going back I am not the pile of poo you make me out to be.

Answer 1

Your solder probably has a picture of you and the babe in someones face right now. Look up into the stars every night and be reminded that he is thinking only about you. Your true love is out there fighting for this country but the real victory was when he won you.
Never ever forget that.

He brags about you, thinks about you, and probably prays for you.

In the mean time. Scrap book and invite friends over to share what he is going through.

Have a day of the week the girls come over and brag to them all you can.

He's closer then you think in the grand specrum.

With love, nothing can separate you.

Answer 2

This is a hard situation. Granted my soldier and I are not yet married. He is currently in a different state than me, so we don't get to see each other now. He is leaving for Iraq next month, and I won't even get to see him before he leaves because I am in Nursing school. He doesn't want me screwing up school to come see him when I have worked so hard for so long. I feel like I am going to go crazy too when he leaves, because atleast right now we get to talk everyday for a couple of hours. I think the best way to handle it (this is what I did last time he was deployed) is to keep as busy as possible. It won't be hard since you have a newborn. You will have days when everything seems to go wrong and you just have to cry, and then you will have days that you know everything is okay. The important thing is to make sure you have some close friends or family there to support you and help with the baby when needed. If someone offers to watch the baby for you, let them. Get out and have some you time. Other than that you will be okay. You will find strength you never knew you had. I know it is hard for the men and women who leave and go overseas, but sometimes I think it is worse on the ones left behind. We all constantly worry, miss them so much it hurts, and have many nights where we just cry ourself to sleep. I promise, you will find the strength you need. That is a quality of a new mom and a military wife. Hope this helps....

Answer 3

You won't go crazy, well at lest no more then the rest of us. My husband is deployed at this time, he left 24JUNE07. Mind you we were just stationed in Italy, we got here 09MAY07 now I am left here alone with no one and no friends. I am still alive and well. Granted I don't have a baby but I can tell you that going crazy as much as you feel like you might just isn't an option. You keep it together and don't even realize it. At lest that is what I have found.
If you find yourself getting low...too blue then go to the doc and ask for a anti-depressant. Don't snub it and don't feel like your less if you need one. There is very few military wives that don't even if on a normal basis medication was never needed. This life does it to most.
If you need someone to bounce off of your welcome to e-mail me.
Good Luck and I pray that your husband comes home safe and healthy.

Answer 4

I have always found that the best way to keep my mind off of myself and from becoming depressed is to get involved in something where I help others. I know with a newborn that it is hard to get out. However, your baby can come with you to volunteer functions. I am involved with the Lyons Club. Probably their youngest member, however I find that I am surrounded by successful people who I gain infinite knowledge from. We have a committee that I serve on that helps provide things for soldiers returning from Iraq. There are many church organizations and Junior Woman's clubs. This type of activity can rel eave your mind a bit by contributing to your community and make your husband proud of you and what you are doing at the same time. This is what I do......I'm spiritual and not so religious, however I find it is true that it is by giving that you receive. I hope that this helps. Thank you and your husband for serving our country and I wish you the best.

Answer 5

You keep him safe and strong in your heart and when you look into the beautiful eyes of your child know that he is in them. You love that baby and tell your child what a great and wonderful father (he/she) has. Take lots of pictures of your little one and start a photo album for Dad. Keep a journal and write down all of your emotions and feelings for your husband to read when he returns home.Continue to communicate when you can together and believe that God will keep him safe. You stay strong and be his strength and let him know that your spirit is with him. You take this time and enjoy your baby for the both of you because that is what he would want you to do. I understand your feelings right now being a new mother and missing this special time with your husband. This is very difficult for you because you have every reason to be worried about him right now and I know that. But, keep the faith and the belief that one day you will all be together again and be a family. Our son made it home from Irac and your husband will make it to.I admire your courage at this difficult time and appreciate all that you and your husband have given of yourselves. You take care of your newborn baby and know that everytime you hold it in your arms you are holding your husband to.

Answer 6

Alot of women that were very active in life that are now tied down with a newborn, while the father is not around do get very depressed quite quickly. My advice to you would be, try to keep yourself surrounded with family and friends as often as possible to keep yourself from thinking how lonely you really are. Family ad Friends are the best medicine for depression.

Answer 7

Sorry dear, the collective iq on here is in the single digits sometimes, first of all you and your husband kick azz, THANKYOU.2nd, maybe planning a welcome home bash for him will help pass the time , or maybe planning something a little more private will help. think of every detail you can, about decorating, catering his favorite food, keep a diary and give it to him to read when he gets home so you can both look back on this 50 years from now and be happy that everything turned out well. my best to both of you.

Answer 8

Your focus should be on the newborn...For one thing, the newborn needs you for survival...You should dwell on the newborn, not yourself...I'm not saying you sound selfish...I'm just saying with the newborn, you will have plenty to do...and another thing, staying busy with the newborn will help take your mind off the soldier being gone...

Answer 9

I admire military wives so much. When I met my husband, he was in the Army and I was so impressed with how the military wives stuck together and were a strong support for one another. You need to find the military wives group on your base and make friends. They know EXACTLY what you're going through and can help support you.

Answer 10

Right now you need to stop thinking about yourself, you have a newborn who is totally depending on you, your moods will affect the mood of your baby and your husband when he calls home. Your husband is depending on you to be a source of strength for him. Pray for your husband every day while he is deployed, ask God to keep his mind, ask God to keep his arms of protection around your hubby, ask God to protect him from every danger seen and unseen, this is what I did for my son who was in Fallujah and Kabul, didn't have time to be depressed, when he called home, and I can hear the tension in his voice, even though I wanted to cry because he was my child, I knew he called because he needed to hear strength, So honey pick yourself up, love that newborn, and love your husband, you have to be strong mentally for your baby and him, you can do this but pray for your husband. Please feel free to email me ok :)