My daughter has looked forward to going away to school. She took two years at the community college, and now is finally off to a state school 2 1/2 hours away. She is overwhelmed, and very lonely (the dorm is a quiet one- and when she gets back all the doors seem to be closed). She is not connecting, and misses her life at home (she worked and voulnteered with older folks - 20s -60s.. who she used to complain were so much older than her- but now she says she would trade a life of college for her daily life at home). She HAS had depression in the past, so it's a fear.
It breaks a mom's heart to hear your baby (the oldest, but Still - she'll always be my first born) crying.
Is there some wisdom anyone can give me to get MYSELF through the missing her, to give her wise advice but not tell her what to do, and help HER help herself?
It's a sad night here.
Signed,
Brand New College Mom
2007-08-17 19:27:35 · 4 answers · asked by Mc K 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Well, i guess she should go to a Dr. just to make sure she doesn't need help for her depression. She needs to get out and make friends. Volunteer at a nursing home to have something to do. Keep busy!
My daughter (oldest also) just got out of boot camp....talk about crying on the phone and wanting to come home....
So i know how heartbreaking it must be for you!
Good Luck!
2007-08-17 19:34:53 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dear Brand New College Mom,
As hard as it is, in my own heart. I think she should try and stick it out.
Ive been there to, it sounds like her real first time away from home. If so, it's not going to be easy on any of you. Let her know, you love her every day, and your there for her. But she must triumph this fear.
Being lonely, is one of the turfiest fears. It can be very scary at times as well.
But as you described, she very smart and kind. She's stronger than she knows. But the only way for her to find her strength is for ( her ) to find it.
The best for her, would be to join some collage groups. And maybe learn some self defense classes.
I don't have any true answers for you, but I do wish you and your family the best.
2007-08-17 20:29:11 · answer #2 · answered by lvn_jb06 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Growing up and adjusting to life on her own is not going to be easy for any child.
Some depression and difficulty in learning to cope is normal.
I wouldn't worry unless it goes on for a long time.
2007-08-17 20:38:59 · answer #3 · answered by Irv S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know its really hard for you...
to talk and hear your daughter crying
i think she have to find a way to make her happy...keep herself busy, join in school activities and such.
sending her something to do...like her hobbies...
Im a daughter, I went here to the states because I want to helo my family...im only 20...Im alone,Im sad,I feel tired,but I never say a word to my family esp my mom because I know shes gonna worry...and I dont want her to get crazy thinking of me esp im far away from them...
so i understand whats your daughter goin thru...
good thing, I can pretend im tough even inside im weak...
2007-08-17 20:45:04 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋