Been together for 6 years and married 5 months. we have a one year old daughter. I am in my 20's and he is as well. we have a "paper" perfect relationship. he is a great dad and a great husband. Technically everything is perfect. except it feels like we are on 2 different wave lengths and we can't get to each other. Everytime we talk we get annoyed with eachother and end with an argument. Nothign major.. its more of a "i need a break from you cause you are annoying me" type. I ask myself if i am still "in" love with him and i don;t know. I love him very much but am i in love with him... there is no spark... does that happen after 6 years? or have we just burned out our flame.... i feel like i live with a roommate rather then a sexy man. . . i treat him like a roommate rather then a sexy man...
2007-08-17 18:42:10 · 8 answers · asked by lalalala 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I know it sounds weird but it brought tears to my eyes to see everyones answers... I was worried i would get dumb answers making fun of me but instead i am getting some great advise.. thank you everyone
2007-08-17 19:05:50 · update #1
Maybe that's your problem ~ treating him like a roommate? He should feel loved, treasured and like your best friend. Men have a geniune need to feel respected. If you try to start showing him more love and respect, and if you give him some time he'll start to come around. Some counseling wouldn't hurt either.
Remember how you used to feel and work on things from there. Just because you're with a person for years doesn't mean you lose the spark. However, when you're in a relationship, life happens. And sometimes you really have to work on things ~ it's not just all fun and games.
2007-08-17 18:56:41 · answer #1 · answered by Jenn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think a little time apart is always healthy. Even just a weekend apart, have him go fishing for a weekend or some such thing. It lets you see what you were taking for granted. I think you guys just hit a slump and there will be many of those. And you will always be on another wave length; he's a guy and you're a girl - there really is no other way to explain it. And with you guys just recently being married, I'm wondering if both of you are feeling the pressure of what the "duties" of a wife/husband are. Talk it out, you'll be fine.
2007-08-18 01:57:25 · answer #2 · answered by lippy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Marriages are not perfect and they do not stay the same for years at a time. It sounds like you are going through a bit of change.
So - it's time to open up about the change, discuss it with hubby and even seek some counseling time.
You can weather this and probably come out better in the end for dealing with your feelings straight on.
2007-08-18 01:50:23 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I've heard of this happening many times around the 7 yr mark...it seems your in a rut...a point in the marriage where your both are in unfamilar territory or not really sure whats next..such a situation can be caused by lack of planning and/or you both being on a different level at this point in your marriage and find to difficult to agree on where do you go from here....open communications is key...however if your both really on separate levels...family councelor may be necessary to bring the two of you closer.
2007-08-18 01:57:47 · answer #4 · answered by Goodspeed 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love is a choice. You should do what ever you can to be more agreeable with him, since you can't change him, try changing what you are doing. Stop treating him like a roommate and start treating him like your husband. Honey always works better than vinegar.
2007-08-18 01:53:59 · answer #5 · answered by Sweet Suzy 777! 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
wow, really dont know what to say other than treat him like ur husband
2007-08-18 02:00:14 · answer #6 · answered by charlesjerrell 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
and how long has this been? if for short time, maybe just stress, if for long, its a serious issue.
2007-08-18 01:50:53 · answer #7 · answered by Discovery 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it happens.
2007-08-18 01:56:18 · answer #8 · answered by just hanging around 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋