Is it wrong to have sexual fantasies of other men while you're still married?

Question

Ok, I've been with my husband for 7 years. Sex is good, but it's never as great as when you're younger ;). When I have sex with my husband and even when I don't, I always fantasize about sleeping with other men.

The most recent guilty pleasure is that I've been fantasizing about someone at work because I've noticed him eyeing on me. That coworker is also married. I'm having bad thoughts! Is this wrong? I tell my husband that I think of other men when we're having sex, but he doesn't seem to mind as long as it turns me on and get me in the mood. However, the thing with the coworker is something I never had before. I'm starting to look forward to going to work and see him, starting to look better, etc. These are all signs of when I was younger and I was falling for someone. Help! What do to do?

Answer 1

nope nothin wrong with it if it's all in your head.
If you find yourself fantasizing just remember why you are married to your husband.

I have similar feelings but I know no one will treat me with as much consideration and thoughtfullness of the one I'm with right now.

Marriage is not just about sex.. some people tend to forget that nowadays. There are alot of aspects of it that should bring joy to you.

Answer 2

Oftentimes married couples look at fantasies as a means of adding a little spark to their own love-making. For the most part sexual fantasies are a normal part of life (married or not). It is normal to fantasize about some movie star, or celebrity. And in our fantasies we can alway imagine new people, new circumstances.

However, your fantasy is wrong. Its wrong because you are involved with a real person. Its wrong because this real person is picking up on your body language and this could turn bad, real bad. Your are creating a crush on this guy and that is not acceptable.

What to do? What to do? Okay, don't panic... Lets play out this fantasy of yours. You and this guy arrange to meet secretly and when you're together you have an affair.... Oh dear, now you're feeling sooo guilty.. You want to tell someone but you can't.. You know this would hurt your husband and ruin your marriage, and ruin the other guy's marriage too. This other guy tell you its no big deal and wants to do it again. He also tells you that he knows what he's doing because he has done this before. He thinks all the ladies go for him.. Then your husband finds out and boy is he ever upset... Your family hears about this and boy is your mom ever upset. Everybody treats you like you're the most evil person in the world... ugh... You hate yourself.

Aren't you glad we played out that little fantasy? Now when you want a fantasy in the future, use Brad Pitt, or Clay Aiken or any other sex symbol.. Its safer, and more normal.

Answer 3

2 words: domicile wrecker. Honey, no offense, yet have you ever heard of something as self understand? no longer in trouble-free terms are you hurting your boyfriend via doing this, you're additionally probably ruining a kin. This guy is MARRIED with infants. and in spite of in the event that they're older than you and can preserve themselves, it nonetheless does not dispute from the undeniable fact which you're ruining a marriage. the two smash up consisting of your boyfriend or smash it off with the married guy. Do you incredibly think of what you're doing is ethical? It needless to say isn't. think of it via. it is likewise incorrect, you're probably nonetheless a new child. you're 17 years previous and he's 50+. it incredibly is extra suitable than a 33 twelve months age hollow. there is obviously some thing incorrect with him, or you. I definitely think of you should make certain somebody. there is under no circumstances an excuse for cheating, on the two money owed. You and him.

Answer 4

Your in trouble and you know it,just make sure you keep a safe distances from your co-worker that's all. You never said that you would never ever sleep with another man why is that. There is nothing wrong with you wanting to look better when you go to work. You need to get out your old pictures and look at them and remember the way it was when the two of you met and how it was when you kiss for the first time.Those are the things that brings the magic back in your marriage. Memorizes is what keeps us in love you just forgot that.Keep your mind on what you have not what you want.

Answer 5

Here's my opinion, but you do as you will.
As far as I can tell, it's sort of wrong, because in a way your sort of cheating on your husband. As for your husband, I think his pretending that it doesn't bother him. Think on this: if your husband told you his thinking of other women when you guys are having sex, would you feel a bit upset about it?

The fantasies are causing you to have emotions for a relationship that doesn't even exist. The only relationship is coworker and if he eyes you ignore him or at least do your best to. I'm not saying your evil or anything like that, but your vows are important between you and your husband.

As for the sex, try to experiment with your husband. Try some sex games, different sex positions, different places to have sex. Make it more exciting for you and your husband.

Good luck.

Answer 6

Can your husband access your Yahoo and see this question?

Either way, what I would suggest is to give him head every single night for two weeks (or morning if you prefer). Think of the coworker if you have to. At the end of the two weeks, ride him reverse cowgirl on the couch every night for a third week. Then after your period, start over with the head. Keep this up until your hubby complains.

Then you have every right to pursue the guy at work. Wear lots of nice thongs, too.

Answer 7

Hi Girlie, sounds like something is up with you.

Your husband is understanding of your fantasies of other men because he probably fantasizes about other women. Thats just normal.

The fact that you are wanting to be around this guy is troubling, but also a little normal.

What you need to do is remind yourself of why you are with your husband and that you love your HUSBAND.

Keep your distance from this other man. If he was eyeing you he may be feeling the same way. Dont make any sort of plans with him, not even lunch, which could lead to more.

If this is really troubling to you, maybe you should consider visiting a counselor, that may have helpful tips to offer.

Answer 8

Well, great, now you have a new fantasy. Work things out in your head and remember you are married and not available. Others may from time to time stir feelings inside that you haven't felt for a while, that doesn't mean you should go for it. Be a mature woman and respect your marriage and your husband.

Answer 9

I think you are in for some marital problems with your husband by your behavior with this co-worker. You are on the road in having an affair and committing adultery.

If you want to stay married and not have these bad thoughts, then you should think about getting another job somewhere else.

Also, with the thoughts that you have now for wanting to see this other man, it is totally wrong because you are playing this game with him. Don't ruin your marriage for another man, because all you will be to that other man is an 'unpaid who*e' who just wants to get into your pants.

I would consider reading "The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands" and "The Proper Care and Feeding of Marriage." Start taking your marriage vows seriously and stop playing these games.

Answer 10

I think it's normal to fantasize, they make sex a little more exciting again. As long as you don't act them out with other men. You probably have that smile and that extra bounce in your step, right? Because you feel a little sexier, a little more wanted. Those butterflies in your stomach have learned to fly again! As long as your fantasies don't blur with reality and you don't take your husband for granted (he sounds like a great guy) I think you're fine.