Ok, I know of course that it takes two to tango, in order to get pregnant in the first place. But when it comes down to it, in our society today is it really up to the woman if a couple experiencing an unplanned pregnancy has a baby? My long term relationship has ended over my unplanned pregnancy recently (i am 35 weeks along). My ex has since pointed out how unfair it is to be a guy in this situation because when it comes down to it, its really all the womans decision in the end, and how that just doesnt seem right since the child is half his. In an odd way, I can totally see where he's coming from (though im not letting that alter my decision on what to do about this baby, which is keep her and love her with all that I have, and get out of this relationship asap). in a twisted way, does anyone else see how this could be "unfair" for a guy?
(she gets to chose to raise the baby, abort it or hate it put up for adoption)
2007-08-17 17:44:27 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
frogee---youre right about the shoe being on the other foot. i honestly feel that is MEN carried babies, the human race would be near extinct in just years. (probably a slight exaggeration...) but I hoenstly do think that birth rates would significantly decline for sure
2007-08-17 18:06:23 · update #1
no its not wrong, because adoption and abortion have emotion effects on a woman that will remain with them for the rest of their lives. you as a female will never forget the baby you gave up in either adoption or abortion. further abortion i believe can damage you psyically, when a man can get pregnant go through the emotional and psyical changes it takes to become a mommy.. then yes.. he can have a say.. until then, if he doesn't want to be a daddy he should keep his pecker in his pants. the same of course goes for women who don't want to be mommies, it really isn't hard to prevent pregnancy.. i'm glad you decided to keep your baby and love your baby, i'm sure you'll make a great and mature mom.. its a huge change.. but as someone said in a post for another question on here somewhere, momma's are super heros.
2007-08-17 17:56:58 · answer #1 · answered by Kitterkat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the guy wants to be supportive, let him. I mean have the baby, but unless you are rich, who's gonna pay for everything when you can't work. If he says the baby is half his, let him pay half the bills, starting with the OB/GYN and continuing for the next 18 years. If he didn't want a baby, why didn't he get a vasectomy? Did the condom break? Getting the baby in there is half his responsibility. If he made choices which resulted in the pregnancy, then he gets to take care of his half for the next 18 years. Good Luck.
2007-08-17 17:57:37 · answer #2 · answered by roscoedeadbeat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, it's a tough question. really it's not unfair because when you choose to have sex w/ someone, you know full well the risks, long term relationship or not. therefore, when you get pregnant it's his responsibility too, whether he chooses it or not, kinda like if he ate 10 twinkies a day for a year and gains 40 lbs....he'd get fat...maybe he didn't want to get fat, but he sure as shootin' wanted the twinkies...so he has to live w/ it and deal w/ it. sure you have more options as to whether to let the baby live, or whether to keep it or give it up...but you also carry the burden physically, which entitles you to more of a say.
anyway, basically, he's not a real man, and 10 years from now when your precious little girl asks where daddy is, or why he didn't want her...i guarantee you won't "see where he's coming from." kudos for your decision, and best of luck w/ your lovely baby girl :)
2007-08-17 17:56:34 · answer #3 · answered by cheesey :) 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I agree that this can be unfair for the man! Yes, we do have the say because it's our body. What if the shoe were on the other foot? If guys could get pregnant would the world be as populated as it is? Probably not. My fiance says that if he were the one having the kids he wouldn't care what I said!
2007-08-17 18:00:20 · answer #4 · answered by frogee100179 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol he could have wrapped the tool first. Like you said.. it takes 2 to tango. Before doing what he did.. he should have thought about the consequences! I hope he comes around though, especially for her! And i'm also a believer in.. "everything happens for a reason" So i think you're supposed to have her! :) My husband knows the consequences of his actions, that's why he freaks out once a month.
2007-08-17 17:54:08 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
if you are havign sex you run the risk of parenthood. you can't change your mind after the fact. Make him pay support!!!
2007-08-17 17:54:17 · answer #6 · answered by parental unit 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well off course its up to the woman. if you havent noticed, the average guys would have sex when ever with whoever.
2007-08-17 17:54:09 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
When a man can get pregnant, he can have a bigger say.
2007-08-17 17:51:34 · answer #8 · answered by la buena bruja 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋