Why do we love?

Question

...from a 16 year old who can't tell the difference between love and infatuation...

i need a philosophical anwser please...

can anyone give me the science behind love?
is it a sate of mind empowered by long term infatuation? lust? chemicals in our brains? God maybe???

is it ture that infatuation can lead people astray into thinking they are in love whereas true love or love in general cannot? Why?

Answer 1

You are too young to know what love is yet. Stick with like or as you put it infatuation.

Answer 2

"Why" questions always cause us to resort to whatever convictions we hold, unprovable though they may be. A scientific explanation is great, but doesn't actually answer the question as you've put it, and certainly doesn't give it meaning. This is all to say that my answer has a lot to do with what I believe. It is philosophical, and (I think) thoughtful, but it's not like you'll be able to track down the answer somewhere and say to yourself "aha, here is the proof of what that guy said."

For a long time (and today still among many) people believed in the human soul. Very few people had (or have) a great definition of what it is, what it does, or why we even need it, but felt very strongly that we do. Really, though, at this point in human development, the traditional conception of it is outdated. If you accept materialist assumptions (or at least enough of them to receive what science can teach us), there is no evidence of a soul within a human person. However, there are aspects of human existence that are, though not unique to humanity, inexplicable from a strictly materialist perspective.

The main thing to which I refer is our capacity to relate: to each other, to the world around us, to God. The human potential to navigate relationships that transcend the basic "what can it do for me?" questions, to not merely perceive objects and other people around us but to know them intimately, is the human soul. But then what is love?

Infatuation asks the type of questions I mentioned above: it is interest in the other only in terms of the others perceived benefit to or for me. It fades when we actually come to know someone, because the cost-benefit analysis gets too tricky as we discover the other's imperfections. Love can come after infatuation, or it can skip infatuation altogether, but it differs in that love is interested in the other for the other's sake, not its own. It is the conscious choice of the good for the other without regard for the consequences to oneself, or even with regard to them. It is irrational, in defiance of our best instincts, but ultimately, it is the highest expression of our very soul.

Answer 3

Why do we love? We love because thats what our souls feeds off of, whether it's a romantic love between two people, the love of a family member or close friend, the love of an object with certian sentimental qualities, or the love of our talent/hobby/subject. We love because there is not other way for us to live. We crave love, we want love so bad it makes us sick and it makes us heal, it makes us cry and it makes us happy.

When you are debating about whether you love someone it can be very hard to tell sometimes whether you do. Lust/Infatuation can sometimes feel like love because you have never been in love and aren't sure exactly how it feels.

All I know is that when you love someone it is unconditional, you love them because there is no other way than that, you just do. And nothing could change that love.

Answer 4

This is a very deep question from someone so young. If you want to read some spiritual literature that deals with love there are some great books out there. Most Spiritual leaders will tell you that love is a "State of Being" and who, or more accurately, WHAT you are, and most definitely NOT an emotion like the vast majority of the population thinks. Real love does not turn to hate like the emotion most people call love can easily do as evidenced by the high rate of divorce. If you are really seeking the answer to what is love, and want the truth, spiritual literature is where to find it. I would suggest reading "The Power of Now" by Eckard Tolle and going from there. Tolle does a good job of explaining emotions versus states of being. It is said that if you are honestly seeking the truth that you will find it. Not many seek the truth, so not many find it. Good luck if you choose a spiritual journey. That is why I think we are here. Don't settle for what most of the world settles for - especially what passes for love. Every day make some silent time and ask your higher self for the truth and you will get guidance. Do not confuse a Spiritual path with Religion, they are not the same. Namaste.

Answer 5

What I know for sure is that love and infatuation are very different from each other...although connected a bit...it is very easy to mistaken infatuation for love especially when you are younger...infatuation is an instant physical connection, it also does not last for a long time once you stop interacting with a person...in other words, it will go away once the object of your desire is away...it is extremely hard to get over it but it doesn't take long time to do so...
when you are in love, it is different...it is more tender...it is more emotional...physical aspect is yet still present...and it doesn't just take a person to disappear for you to forget him/her...it can take a lifetime to get over your true love...
another interesting fact is that the faster you fall for someone, the faster you fall out of love with him/her...real love usually starts from zero and gradually progresses to a great love...again, infatuation can grow into love as well...depends
i think you will really know only when you have experienced both

why do we love? i don't really know...i think that every person should have his/her own reason...or maybe not? maybe there isn't any reason? maybe we just love to love
i think the world will be a better place if we don't try too hard to find the answer to this question...we should just love

Answer 6

We love because it is the utmost feeling of a person. It is the most interesting a 16 year old like would feel. I know how it feels to be in love with your same age. It gives you a feeling of excitement in a day to day activity because you wanted to see your love in your heart. Infatuation on the otherhand doesn't really fall to love, The fact that it is only an infatuation is just giving a crush to a person. Going back to love, you must not allow this to just fly. You must nourish it and give back the affection someone is giving you. This must be a dual and reciprocal process. However, use this as an inspiration to finish your studies so you may have a better future in life ahead of you. Good luck my boy.

Answer 7

Smile. A very good question, BTW. I think, because we have a need to be irreplaceable in someones life. Didn't you know: you are nobody until someone loves you... That works both ways.

P.S. It has to do with chemicals in your brain ( hormones ). When someone falls in lust, his hormonal levels are elevated and it feels magical for a short while ( like eating a very good chocolate candy ). Love is based on emotional, mental and physical connection between two people. It is a much deeper feeling, that is why it lasts longer.

Answer 8

Because love is another natural emotion. Infatuation has nothing to do with love or even like!

Answer 9

The chemical is oxytocin. thats the chemical that is associated with social bonding. we humans need love maternal love especially because we are such helpless babies, a giraffe can walk 20 minutes after it is born, we can walk till we are two, and can't really fend for ourselves till we are over half a decade old, evolution made us monogamous to have two parents taking care of the young. more specifically we humans love simply because love is soo much more conducive to happiness than hate.

Answer 10

Same thing. Long term infatuation is called love.