I need a friend.?

Question

I have been married for bout 7 yrs. and now i discovered that im really lonely.I dont even have friends besides my husband.hes ok but i felt that i needed something more that he just can't give me.Tell me "Am I being selfish "? I used to be an outgoing kind of person and I have friends then.But since I got married.......

Answer 1

i hope he doesnt push your friends away, that would really be considered a type of abuse. but, not saying the worse, you should just call up your old friends, go to an event of some kind, like back in the old days, have a girls night out, just have fun without him. marriages dont have to be boring

Answer 2

I am in the same situation as you. My husband is by best friend. We have been married 10 yrs. No you are not being selfish. Women seem to need friends more than men. Mostly because their relationships are not deep like ours are anyway. I always have had a best friend or several friends to do stuff with. Now that I am married I feel like I don't know how to make friends. I just seem to make lots of acquaintances. I can talk on a superficial level to people okay, but it is harder to talk to people on more of a deeper level, like to trust them until I know they're my good friend and really like me and are not just talking to me to be just talking and being nice. I used to be more outgoing and have turned back into my shell too. Inside I'm insecure of myself until I get to know people on a deeper level. Once I know that they really like me than I open up. I can talk and yak away then. I'm really good at one on one. But in a group, I have a harder time. Some ideas for you might be, getting a group of married couples together to play games. Do you have any similar interest of anyone else? Like do you guys go to church? Work out at a gym? Membership of anything? Go somewhere regular? How about work friends? If you wanted to talk more, you can e-mail me at [e-mail].

Answer 3

I hear ya loud and clear and I am in a very similar condition. I am finding its time to consider getting out of my relationship. All the talks and compromises and potential changes just have not worked. Where I am happy. Maybe you are where I am maybe not but try to talk and you have to be honest brutally honest to get the changes you need done. If not well as hard as it is there are other avenues.

Answer 4

Sounds like you married young. Grew up over the seven years and are now someone completely different. You're not being selfish at all. Do what you need to do before it gets worse.

Answer 5

too much of ANYONE isn't good.

everyone should have friends besides their spouse.

everyone needs a seperate support group and other people to share things they can't share with their spouse. i think it's completely understandable.

do you work, go to a girls night out or something. or start talking to the neighbours, volunteer from things, i'm sure you'll find people. at least that's what I keep telling myeslf ;)

Answer 6

try to get your old friends back,if not,get new oness who dont care if your married....unless u lost ur friends because youve been spending too much time with your husband,then maybe you should plan a girls night out once and awhile,maybe thats the problem.....

Answer 7

Friends - good ones who respect you - are important. Maybe IM someone and strike up a conversation....it may help out immensely.

Answer 8

What do you need from him that you are not getting? What ever it is, tell him to provide it. If he cant, you must make a decision to either stay and accept it or leave him and hope someone else can provide it. Next time be more careful choosing a mate.

Answer 9

If you need someone to talk to, Iam here for you.....ok