I am 33 years old and have pratically no sex drive! Is there anything I can do to get it to come naturally?

Question

I am engaged so I have to be able to please my man but I am tired of just going through the motions. My fiance is gorgeous so it's not an attraction issue and I am tired of using special creams and watching "movies" to get arroused! I am on birth control and have no children. Shouldn't I be coming into my prime or something??!! HELP!

just to clarify... yes, I have talked to my gyno. I was on the pill for a long time and went off for 6 months to see if that was the issue... There was no significant change. As far as taking a break from my man?? Umm that is so not the issue. We are deeply in love and aren't remotely stressed about our wedding (more than a year away) or any other life events. As far as the rabbit comment?? I am surprised my rabbit still works! Best invention ever! LOL Enjoying the act is not the problem! We are intimate 2 - 3 times a week so as far as he is concerned he is getting satisfied. I am just missing that urge & feeling you get (women know what I am talking about) when you have to have it! And it's not like I have never felt "the urge" before. I get it now on occasion but it's months apart!

Answer 1

FIRST talk to your doctor about your BC there are many diffrent forms of the pill and one might be better for you than another. Also consider getting a toy. finger rabbit, rabbit or a standard vibe will work. I suggest for your first one not to get one bigger than your man just in case. The more orgasms a woman has, the easier it is for her to have another. Practice by yourself over and over and over again. Determine if you can orgasm vag/clit or both.
Chris

Answer 2

Sounds like you could have depression issues or a chemical imbalance that makes you kind of melancholy--first mention it to your medical doctor (gyno would be sensitive to this problem). You're right; you should be more enthusiastic about sexual relations given your age, the fact that you have a 'gorgeous' man you are planning a future with. Don't fret -- just get some help with this before it ends up some deeply-rooted, chronic issue. This is no dress rehearsal so get help with this. (You could be tired or just overwhelmed with life too, so without a high energy level, you are operating with a deficit -- could be as easy as adjusting your diet or vitamin regimen.)

Answer 3

I have the same thing going and I'm 29 and have been married 2 years now. I'm also on the pill and have no children. I've been on the pill for 9 years. I truly believe the pill has decreased my sex drive in a huge and horrible way. I am never in the mood and it also has nothing to do with my husband. I've talked to doctors and none of them truly understand. Perhaps we should both get off the pill and see if that helps!

Answer 4

I think you need to go see your Gyno and have a a frank talk with that person and ask for a complete hormone work up and blood tests, especially for thyroid. If they all turn out normal, than I think you need to talk to a therapist to find out what's going on. Something is not right, especially since you are not even married or have children. It's not fair to get married under these circumstances. It's not fair to you, either. Being intimate is one of the most important bonding elements of marriage.

Answer 5

What Causes Low Sex Srive?
A low sex drive can stem from physical conditions or psychological problems. In order to find an effective solution, it's important to identify what has triggered it. Causes can include:

Menopause

Pregnancy

Pain during intercourse

Illness

Obesity or anorexia

Drugs and alcohol

Psychological factors

Relationship issues

Sexual abuse


Menopause
Menopause (the time in a woman's life when she no longer has menstrual periods) can have an effect on sexual desire in several ways:

As a woman ages, it may take longer for her to become sexually aroused, and that arousal may be less intense than it was in her earlier years.

During menopause, a woman's ovaries stop producing the hormone estrogen. This can lead to vaginal dryness, which can make intercourse uncomfortable.

Lack of estrogen also can thin the walls of the vagina, leading to soreness during and after intercourse.


Dryness or discomfort can be relieved with hormone replacement therapy, which replaces the estrogen her body no longer is producing, or with the use of a vaginal lubricant, which is available over-the-counter at pharmacies and grocery stores.

For more information about hormone replacement therapy, go to Hormone Replacement Therapy.

Nice To Know:

Men also may experience decreased sex drive later in life. They may have difficulty achieving or maintaining an erection even if the desire is present. Couples need to be aware of each other's changing sexual needs, and should consider different approaches to sexual relations that may not necessarily include intercourse.

It's important to remember that sexuality need not end because of increasing age. For many couples, with a bit of adjustment, a normal healthy sex life can continue as they age.



Nice To Know:

Researchers who conducted a survey in1999 for the AARP, an organization of older adults, found that among women ages 45-74, about 60% said they had sexual relations once a week or more frequently.

The study also showed that health problems played a role when sexual activity declined. About one-third of the women said that if they or their partners were healthier, they would also be more sexually active.

Answer 6

I realize, the importance of effective birth control is important. However, a healthy sex life is equally important. Consider, as an experiment, eliminating the OC, and substituting other means of birth control.

If you combine a barrier method, with a spermicide, rhythm, and coitus interruptus, you should be quite safe. The barrier, may be a condom, diaphragm, or female condom. The spermicide, may be a foam, jelly or cream. Rhythm, should be accomplished by daily temperature measurements. The down side, of coitus interruptus, i.e., partner discontent, may be remedied by immediate fellatio.

Answer 7

Well it would help if you found someone that really turned you on. I know for years I did not have a good sex life until I found someone I really trusted. We just clicked and I was able to loosen up. We enjoyed giving each other pleasure with no weird issues. Good luck, there's nothing like it! Unfortunately I am not with that person anymore. But now that I know it can happen, I have hope.

Answer 8

you don't HAVE to anything! maybe you two just need a break from each other for a while. you could be just tired or maybe your too worried about getting married. maybe your thinking " gee this is the same guy im going to have sex with every night for the rest of my life with..."
WOMEN can have comitment issues too! green tea is also great for dioxidizing your blood.




PS try taking vitamin E, fish oil, and if anyone near you sells vegetables start using them for raw salads. those are GREAT for energy! go heavy on kale and spinach. make sure you eat it raw.

Answer 9

possibly the stay-in BF is the subject. each from time to time too lots proximity ought to break, till of course, you're married. the buzz of assembly a bf/gf after a protracted day's artwork and working into their palms and making out is a few thing unique. living-in negates the marvel romantic factor.

Answer 10

Don't search for answers on the web, go see a doctor instead. Doctor can give the beast advice on what to do, don't be shy about it.