Past relationship..?

Question

My previous question was deleted, so I posted this one here.. Thanks in advance for your answers.

Last Oct. I met a man online, we began to chat everyday for endless hours. Eventhough he was 10 years my senior [[ I was 20 - he was 29 about to turn 30]], we had so many things in common. Only thing was he worked in Naples and came down to Miami [[ Where I live ]] every other weekend. Turned out we lived 15 mins from each other. We met face to face Christmas day. Everything went wonderful. We spoke on the phone everyday for hours.. we even had stupid little nicknames for each other, and when he came down we went to t/movies, had dinner a couple of drinks, hung out with friends, ultimately got to the point where we had sex, I slept over his house.. etc. This went on all the way until April. Long story short, I fell in love with him [[ yeah stupid me ]] ..

Saturday, before 5 de Mayo, we had sort of a disagreement, On the drive home no hurtful words were exchanged.. Just pure silence. When I got out of his car I slammed t/door shut and walked away.. he peeled off and I didn't hear from him again. It’s been close to 4 months since the last time I saw or spoke to him. I really miss him, and the fact that I haven’t seen him or spoken to him kills me. I know it’s no use to dwell on t/past.. But I wanted an unbiased opinion regarding t/relationship. Did I see more than what was actually there??

Answer 1

Excuse me if the things I am going to say will hurt you in anyways. It sounded to me as if you are just a "gal pal" to this man. It seemed as though he only enjoy being with you when things are "fun and are going his way." This is obvious, especially when he dissapeared after just and I quote " a sort of a disagreement" you guys had. If he thinks that you are someone he want for a long term relationship, this disagreement would be resolve and you guys would still together right now. It seemed as though he is not investing any emotions in this relationship, but you did. You are investing in an empty bank girl. He can walk out on you so easily becuase he had invested nothing. Therefore, he doesn't feel like he is losing anything, so it is easy for him to not care and appreciate anything you guys have. You gave him a free ride. I understand that you missed him, but you need to ask yourself "Do you need him?" There is a huge different between wanting something and needing something. The needs are much more important. You need to eat, you need to sleep, you need to work, etc. You also need to ask yourself, Do I know him enough? Can I tolerate everything about him? Does he contribute anything real and important into the realtionship? Does he ever talk to you about anything serious like family issues, work issues, personal issues, etc? There are more questions you need to ask, these are just some examples. It is not stupid to fall in love with someone, but you need to know what it is that makes you fall in love with him. Do not settle for small increments, but go for the big stuff. Anyways, all I can say is that, you were not the only one in his life at the time you guys were together. Don't let one guy get the best of you. Best of luck.

Answer 2

I've only had three relationships, and a few flings here and there. +My first relationship taught that romance does exist. It's not entirely fairy-tale based, and you have to work for it, but it's still out there. I was very much a realist, and thought that love wasn't real. Even if it was puppy love then, it still taught me that there is love and romance in the world. +My second relationship taught me that without communication, there is no relationship. In this relationship, my boyfriend NEVER talked to me, he'd just stand there. I learned that I really like out going people, and this was not the person for me. I also learned I could have talked to him about this and tried harder. So ultimately it takes an effort from both sides and lots of communication for a relationship to work. +My third relationship taught me that looks aren't everything, as cliche as it is. After we broke up, I pondered for months and months about why I even considered dating this guy. I never thought I would date someone only because I thought he was hot; I never thought I was shallow like that. But it turns out, I was very shallow and very immature. So now, I look past the looks, and I have found that it's so much easier to love a person for who they are instead of how they look. It's also healthier. My flings usually teach me about myself. I've learned: +You need to love yourself, or others won't +Believe in yourself and your own true inner beauty +Not everyone will think you're ugly, and not everyone will think you are pretty +Don't compare yourself to others +Trust in your instincts +Have fun, life is short +Think things through +Don't settle for less +Don't lower your standards +Boys are not everything +It's fun to be single +your girls can provide you with some things a boy can never give you +Be yourself

Answer 3

my fionse is 36 and im 20 buthe looks like 24. ive learned that the age dose have an inpact on things that you may talk about. he views things different and so do you. different years born in. but if neither of you too even said its over and you havent tried to speek to him or him to you then it seens that you too are being stabern and waiting for the other. if you really loved this guy just text or email himfirst and just be like " hello how you doing i know its been a while but i didnt want to be in bad terms. once he replys and the covertations gose on tell him how you feel. trues me me and my fionse had lots and i mean lots of disagrements. thats because the years diff and the point of view. let me know what happens. oh and he dosent reply just move on.

Answer 4

No you didn't. Everything was going well and you fell in love. The question is, did he? One of you will have to break the ice and call up and say I'm sorry. If that doesn't happen, you can probably conclude that your short lived romance is over. I know it hurts to just wait around waiting for something to happen, so bite the bullet and call him

Answer 5

No. Seem both of you have very deep feeling for each other. Maybe it was the disagreement you had made him change direction. i found out recently men analyse everything down to our behavior. They easily freak out. I would suggest if you do miss him, call him to find out what went wrong. if he doesn't return your call, there is your answer. He is not that into you and move on.

Answer 6

i know this answer is obvious, but maybe hearing it from a third party would re-assure you.

dont get into relationships online.

even if you meet a person face-to-face, you won't really know what type of person he really is. what else a person you havn't seen in real life? plus, he is 10 years older. however smart you are, he is smarter cause he has 10 years more experience.

besides, there are other ways to create relationships ;)

Hope this helps, Peace.

Answer 7

Have you tried calling him? if not calling him, maybe he wasn't ready for something more serious, he probably feels it's easier if just doesnt call you. Either way i would call him, and depending on that conversation go to next step. Sounds to me like you guys had something going for a while, maybe there is something else going on with his life. Good Luck.

Answer 8

Sounds like the relationship was going ok. But that you both are too stubborn to get over whatever the fight was about.

Answer 9

Yep, you saw much more than was actually there. You're barely drinking age and he's thinking about 401k. Sort of diametrically opposed don't you think?

Answer 10

i see it as both of you are prideful and neither one wants to be the person to call the other. Be the bigger person and call him only two things can happen he will talk to you and you guys can put it past you or he wont talk to you and you move on