To save more money, I share this small apartment with my brother, my own blood-relative left... just the two of us. I'm 21 and he's 22. I don't know how or why, but there's mean gossip out there that I'm having incest with my own brother! These feminist gossipers also impliy that I'm a weak as a woman who still depends on a man so much, a not-so-independent woman (although they seem don't care that this "man" is still my own blood-brother here!)
My brother just laughs at it since we're not inbreeding at all. We are so closed as brother and sister, but not that close... okay, we are closer than a brother and sister normally are and I do come to him everytime I need care and comfort from someone whom I truly trust....
Tell me then, have I done something wrong here? I do love him so much, but not that much....
2007-08-17 03:59:31 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Gender Studies
Ive gone through the same thing. My sister and i are closer than anyone i know. I love her, shes my little sister and i have to take care of her. I even got her name tattooed on me. Some people have suggested that i love her too much, but thats because there not close with their family. When my parents were going through their divorce all i had was my sister, we were (and still are) best friends. I hang out with my sister all the time.
Its mainly jelously that drives these peoples comments, there just mad that they arent as close with their family members than we are.
Dont let it bother you, i know what your going through. And there is nothing wrong with living with your brother.
2007-08-17 04:11:04 · answer #1 · answered by Fenix 4 · 5⤊ 1⤋
There is NOTHING wrong with this. My brother and I are very close also. We had a rough childhood and always had each other. If life put us in a situation that made it easier for us to make it if we had to live together I think we would make the best roommates because we know how to be there for each other. He can be my best friend. No one comforts me better than him, because no has more history and understand of me than him. Don't listen to other people. YOU and YOUR brother know what is going on between you two and that is all the matters. People are always going to assume the worst. Your brother is right in laughing it off.
2007-08-17 06:32:43 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
There is nothing wrong with it at all. Just because you are brother and sister doesn't mean you can't be room mates. Try not to listen to the gossip. Live how you want to live, the people who are saying this are obviously really immature, forget about them and find a different group of people to hang out with.
2007-08-17 04:09:09 · answer #3 · answered by Mom22 5 · 6⤊ 1⤋
As long as you're not sleeping with him, it's perfectly fine.
This is a very common practice in Italy.
I have an aunt and uncle who have shared a house in Rome all their adult lives. No body thinks these cynical thoughts there.
Family is honored, and this arrangement is respected.
I wish I had a better relationship with my brother, I congratulate you on that success.
Don't worry about what people say...especially here on Y!A where people don't know you, and so many are just hurling anonymous insults.
Ciao :)
2007-08-17 06:14:41 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
No! The talkers will talk and the judgers judge, but you are doing nothing wrong. I wish I could do that with my brother for we have lost that closeness which I really miss. He used to be so compassionate and now he wont talk to me the same.
This is your business. I just would not mention it much to the judges. They will try to define how you should be and erroneously hurt you in the process. That is how they work...trust me I am there with my brother and sister who are judging me lately and doing it all backwards...that is what happens when you lose touch.
People who try to define you are doing it all backwards. The book, Controlling People by Patricia Evans....good reading....I do it over and over again, says it is being controlling to define another person and it is abusive. You can only define what you are doing and why you are doing it and whether it is within boundaries and ethical. We can suggest but not define you. I think if you using your relationship with him as support and being a good friend to you and helping you with sharing the rent, it is ok? Others will talk and you can solidify your answer with us and be more assured of your stance. You are doing well and being a good sister....try a mantra to say to yourself, an affirmation which says this to you when they tell you you are wrong!! Not nice of them.
you can decide what is best for you. I think it is the criticism which is bothering you and destroying your sanity and causing you to question yourself. They might be assaulting your psychy, damaging your psychy by their comments which can cause a lot of confusion to you and sadness when they mess with your reality....that is hurtful and not good for you.
Ms. Evans says to say WHAT? to the definers who want to define your reality....that causes them to stop and think about how they are tryin to define your reality.
This is a question I think about....is it ok for others to define my reality when it hurts and what do I need to do??? I could be wrong but I think you get the point and I am going through the same thing. Get away from them and think about how this is ok for you to live with your brother....I think it is ok but who am I to say, and you might consider that with others so right opinions which are abusive at times. I think.
2007-08-17 04:50:57 · answer #5 · answered by wildrose7 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
no hun you have done nothing wrong. people love to gossip and start hurtful rumors. just ignore the ignorance and be happy with your life! it is great you and your brother are close, that is someone you will always have no matter what. in this day and age it is a rare occurance indeed for families to remain close!
2007-08-17 04:18:41 · answer #6 · answered by Carrie H 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Some people would rather muck in other's lives than have to face the cruel reality they created for themselves in their own. Sharing an apartment with a sibling is entirely reasonable.
2007-08-17 05:54:21 · answer #7 · answered by Recipiscence 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The "feminist gossipers" just hate the fact that you're living with a man (any man) and use the fact that he's your brother as a pretext for their criticism.
2007-08-17 04:18:59 · answer #8 · answered by Carl 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
There are times to say "F--k what everyone else says or is thinking and in my most humble opinion this is one of them. Lots of brothers and sisters share homes. Nothing illegal or immoral about it at all. If others want to think something is wrong or something nasty is going on...well f--k 'em! Let them dwell in their nasty little minds!
2007-08-19 08:40:27 · answer #9 · answered by doctor feelgood 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There is nothing wrong with siblings sharing an apartment. Cousins, brothers and sisters do it. Why can't a brother and sister share an apartment.
People are really twisted.
2007-08-17 04:07:45 · answer #10 · answered by Panama 4 · 8⤊ 1⤋