He hasn't talked to me since yesterday evening. He called while I was with my friends having drinks after work. He was totally cool with it and he's never gotten upset about that before. He pretended to be asleep when I got home and turned his head when I tried to kiss him. Then this morning, he took his time in the shower (he knows I need to be in there by 7am) and didn't get out until 7:25. Left me with only 20 minutes to get ready. He didn't say bye nor did I get a kiss. Not once did he call me today, which is unusual. Then he came home late from work and he also knows how that bothers me. And he won't talk to me and he's giving me dirty looks. If he's bugged about me going out, then why wouldn't he just say so? MEN!, I don't get it. Help me please! Tell me why you think he's upset. Thanks!
2007-08-16 18:25:43 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
First of all didnt u know that men PMS once a month too? lol..
with that said, hes upset hes feeling slited by u for some reason, maybe its the fact that although he was fine with u having drinks after work that u didnt come home till really late.. and he feels neglected.. and the reason why hes ignoring u and showing u he's made instead of telling u , is cause he feels as though u should be able to figure it out with out him having to tell u.. and sometimes people get angry and they dont want to fight they want to be mad but they know if they open their mouth a fight will only happen..
Only u know the whole scenerio, but under pure speculation i will assume u have the normal 9 to 5 job, and the fact that he pretended to be alseep when came home insinuates that u didnt come home till way later that evening so its not like u just had one drink and came home an hour later.. and maybe when he was ok with it, it was him assuming u'd be home soon and when u didnt come home till late.. he was upset... U didnt mention kids, so im not sure if they are part of the equation or not, if u have children, u left him to do everything while u had a good time he had to be the responsible one..and cook dinner, bath, bedtime etc.. and if u dont have children, then it is him feeling neglected and abandoned by u because instead of wanting to spend time with him, u rather spend time with ur friends.. and the fact that u said he never got upset before.. makes me question how often ur doing this, is this becoming a routine, or is this something that happens once ever few months?
2007-08-16 18:38:53 · answer #1 · answered by brwneyedgrl 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Mystery ... no one here could possibly know what his reasoning is. The only way you are going to find out for sure is to talk to your husband. A marriage should be open and honest and you should be able to communicate at ALL times ... even when you're mad. If your husband refuses to do that it is NOT a good sign. It is a sign of immaturity on his part and he needs to grow up a bit.
That being said ... you mentioned he called when you were already out drinking. So does that mean you never called to let him know before hand? If that is true then that is not cool at all. A marriage is a partnership and that means you must be decent enough to at least call you partner and let him know your plans. I'm not saying you must "ask his permission", but out of respect for his feelings you should at least call him and say "Hey, I'm going out for drinks with the girls after work .. is that OK? Or "Do you want to join us?" or "Did you have anything planned?" What if he had planned a romantic night for the 2 of you and you never came home because you were out partying with the girls?? I could see why he would be upset.
You must always think of your partners feelings. Don't just assume they're "cool" with it. He obviously wasn't and is now hurt. You guys aren't dating anymore ... you're married. It is important to have "girl" time ... I completely support that ... but once you marry someone it's not fair to assume you are free to do whatever you did when you were single. Otherwise you should have never gotten married.
Once you're in a "partnership" it is important to get your partners opinions on the choices you are making. You don't always have to agree with them ... or what they say ... but you do need to discuss it. Make an agreement with your hubby to always come to some sort of "compromise". SO go find him ... tell him you'd like to know what it is you did wrong ... or you won't be able to fix it. Then work on building a team together and supporting each other ... come what may!
Peace to you ...
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2007-08-16 18:49:01 · answer #2 · answered by ? 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Was this the first time out in a while, or a chronic event? Does he have drinks with friends after work or comes home? Possibly he is feeling a bit left out, but there is not enough info to help. Try talking to him to see what is bothering him and why, and do NOT react, but listen first, then address the issue.
2007-08-17 00:52:08 · answer #3 · answered by Travis McGee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your husband is an insecure guy. He sees you as an merchandise. once you show your sexuality, it this occasion by ability of having a calender with photos of alternative adult males, it humanizes you. This confuses and upsets your husband. He would not comprehend why an merchandise is without notice 'appearing like a human beings'. To him it is as confounding as seeing a settee examine a e book or watching a television set pour itself a lager. you need to have somebody your husband trusts, like a verify or a mentor, clarify to him that ladies everybody is human beings too. it is going to likely be puzzling, yet in time your husband will start to comprehend and with a bit of luck you will the two be waiting to get exhilaration from your smutty calendars at the same time.
2016-12-12 04:30:20 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let me get this straight you just said that you were out having drinks with your friends after work and your husband is cool with that but when he comes home from work late it bothers you. Do you see were I am going with this. He wasn't out at the bar he was at work but it bothers you so how will you feel if after a long day at work he goes to the bar with his buddies for a few drinks. Have you thought that maybe your husband wants you to spend more time with him and a lot of men are not really pleased with their wife's hanging out at a bar drinking without them. Hope this helped.
2007-08-16 18:39:02 · answer #5 · answered by MZ. Latina 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only thing that would bug me is wanting to spend quality time with my wife and she goes out with friends.
It sounds like he's a little P.O. Ask him. I'm sure he has something to say. Did you miss an anniversary? How have you both been getting along lately? Ultimately you'll find out but asking us here won't solve it. I'm almost in the same boat but I know what the problem is. She just doesn’t want to deal with it.
2007-08-16 18:41:53 · answer #6 · answered by Fixguy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because you went to a bar and had a few drinks with some friends,I'd guess. Maybe he's not as cool with it as you think. Most married men don't like their wives sitting in bars getting loaded after work. They kind of like them to come home and have dinner. Your drink-fests are getting old.
2007-08-16 18:30:33 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I find it strange that you can go out after work for drinks but you get mad when he comes home late. Double standard there.
You need to talk to him. Did you honestly think we could tell you why he is mad at you? We aren't mind readers.
2007-08-16 18:31:43 · answer #8 · answered by Leah 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
He expects you to read his mind but soon he acts like a responsible husband and sits down and talk to you about
what's bothering him, the better the relationship is gonna be.
2007-08-16 18:37:33 · answer #9 · answered by tagara 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he is turning into a woman to me, that is usually the treatment guys get when they do something after she says it is alright . I suggest you check under his underwear , he could be an imposter
2007-08-16 18:31:35 · answer #10 · answered by zelig 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋