Okay so I snooped a little and well I found beer and condoms in his room...what do I do? What should I think? Help please. By the way he is 17 turning 18 this month.
2007-08-16 17:44:12 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He is my brother. I'm scared for him. He's not the same anymore.
2007-08-16 17:56:49 · update #1
The beer is not good and at least he is using condoms. Have a talk with him about responsibility and drinking at a young age. I would take the beer away and leave the condoms.
2007-08-16 17:51:18 · answer #1 · answered by Patrick G 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
As a parent with a minor child living under your roof, you have some lattitude as far as snooping. Grannted, you still owe a teenager a certain amount of privacey and respect as far as space is concerned, but I don't think you are much different than alot of parents. When you were a kid did you hide things from your parents? I know I did. Would I have been upset and embarrared perhaps? Yes indeed, but I never for one minute would expect that I had a full and complete expectation of privacy while living in their "Kingdom" for lack of a better word. I would try to monitor his behaviors and keep close tabs on his whereabouts, and don't have always take his word for it. He will lie like a rug! We did it remember? I wouldn't just come out and say that you were snooping either. Like I said, lay low, watch him like a hawk and if you find other things that alarm you like drugs or more alcohol then maybe find a way to confront him without being hostile. Keep in mind that 17 and 18 year olds will experiment and IF he is having sex, and it would be better if he wasn't, at least he is using a condom.
Scott
2007-08-16 18:02:43 · answer #2 · answered by Scott K 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well as far as the beer goes I would talk to him about and ask him to stop if you are worried. If you dont want him to know you were snooping then ask him out right if he has been drinking or having sex. As his sister you just want to be sure he is safe. The condoms are a good indication that he is at least being safe there. I would be more worried if it were drugs.But as a mom I say ask him outright. If he gets mad its not like he can tell on you without ratting himself out anyway.
2007-08-16 19:53:07 · answer #3 · answered by osborn_tr 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Um.... is this your son or your husband? You posted in marriage & divorce, that's what's throwin me. If you're talking about a husband, well, waiting till he was at least 18 would have been a good idea. ;-) kidding aside.... You're doing the right thing. Sounds like you're educating him since he did have condoms... that believe it or not is a good thing. Don't be too quick to jump to conclusions, I used to use them for practical jokes at school not for what they're intended for. My girlfriends in school always had them. They're handed out for free in a lot of schools. Just because you found them doesnt mean much. Think you two need to sit down and have a talk.
2007-08-16 17:58:36 · answer #4 · answered by bigb_nc 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i'm sorry, sweetheart.
at first, everyone thought he was your son, but now i see he is your brother.
i know it can be scarey to think your brother is involved with sex and alcohol.
i have 4 children, so i know how my youngest daughter feels when she discovers her older siblings having a beer.
i think it's best that you tell your parents. even if your brother gets angry at you for a while..you shouldn't have to handle this information on your own.
they can talk with him, and also with you about how to handle it.
it's not the end of the world, honey, but we know that alcohol is often not a good thing. especially when you're young cause it can become a habit. or it can just be that sometimes young people want to try something and that's the end of it.
so that's why it should become a family discussion. it's not good for families to have secrets like that.
2007-08-16 18:17:00 · answer #5 · answered by shyanne 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's being 18, although neither part is he mature enough to handle, he isnt trying to get away with anything out of the normal for most teenage boys his age, if ur that concerned let ur parents know and let them handle it appropriately..
2007-08-16 18:51:14 · answer #6 · answered by brwneyedgrl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your son's room?
well, the condoms aren't illegal, but i think that the beer is.
if this is your son, let him know that he is underage for drinking and do whatever it is you do to submit discipline? if his father is there also, he needs to know about the beer...
umm yes this is typical of kids -- trying beer, etc... but if you condone it, he's going to think it's perfectly ok.
i wouldn't mention the condoms.. at least if he's having sex, he has those available.
take car.e
2007-08-16 17:56:39 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should be proud of him for practicing safe sex. I was drinking beer at 13 plus mind your business
2007-08-17 01:30:24 · answer #8 · answered by snoopy22564 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
talk to him and then tell on him no im just kidden but really talk to him he is your brother and you love him so let him know you do he might not realize it now but some day he will remember you came to him to help and be there for him it will pay off in the long run good luck....
2007-08-16 18:00:22 · answer #9 · answered by dragonfly 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thinking about becoming a detective?
Go to your parents or some other adult who you trust and respect to talk to your brother.
2007-08-16 18:10:38 · answer #10 · answered by ellen 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋