How can I reassure myself that he's marrying me not just to come to America?
2007-08-16 15:36:32 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Not trying to be prejudice people- I just wanted to make my question general- Wanted to hear other ideas on the topic.It is kind of crazy how people come up with assumptions only knowing that he's from Jamaica and I'm from America.
2007-08-16 16:36:53 · update #1
I am a Jamaican woman and you are perfectly right in having doubts. Yes it is true that many Jamaican guys marry someone outside of the country because they want the opportunity to go abroad, but not all of them are like this. I am friendly with one such person and he is really in love with this American woman.
I really think you should be careful though, if doubts are in your mind you could try coming to see him and see how things are for a while. At least you will have some clue about what his intents are. If he is open with you when you get here; introduces you to family, friends, take you out in public places etc. then it is a good chance that he is for real. If he refuses to do these things then you might want to move on.
I know a lot of Guys here who boast of having relations with women abroad and yet they have relationships with others here.It is a very common thing i must say and so please be very careful.
All the best
2007-08-16 16:41:33 · answer #1 · answered by ? 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow, that's a really hard decision to make. I married a
"boy" from Brazil because that was the only way for him to come and wanted to be with him. In that circumstance, I was most likely used by him, although we stayed together long enough for him to become a permanant citizen. It was a verbally abusive relationship, and the ONLY reason I stayed with him was because I was severely depressed at the time and did not want to be alone. I am much older now, and much more level-headed thank goodness (I remarried and have beautiful children with a wonderful American man). HOWEVER, I know many couples with one being American and one being of another country, who truly love each other. So, it's really hard to say whether or not this man just wants to come here. If you cannot live with yourself if you do not go forward with it, you will regret not knowing what would have happened. So, you could always marry him and see how the first year goes....if he truly loves you, you will be able to tell while you are cohabitating. If you have doubts, end the marriage and cancel all immigration applications before he can become a resident. I wish I had done that! Good luck hun!
2007-08-16 15:53:56 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well lets see. Have you met him? If so where did you meet him? Did you meet him in his country come back to the US and only correspond via the Internet or phone and all of a sudden he wants to get married? Here is the thing, when you two get married a green card will be issued contingent on the fact you are married. If you divorce before a certain number of years or do not reside in the same home living as a married couple he will have his card revoked and shipped outta here. Move to Jamaica that will prove its not because he wants to come to the US. Great food, great weather nice ppl what more could you ask for..However if thats running through your head my only suggestion is dont marry him until your 100% sure its for the right reasons.
2007-08-16 15:42:52 · answer #3 · answered by texas_angel_wattitude 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well reading the question that shows up before clicking to see the rest of it... I was going to say... SO WHAT! As long as the couple love each other... Then,, I read the rest of the question... and you need to ask yourself some questions.
Have you two spent a lot of time together?
Do you both really know each other?
Do you both love each other unconditionally?
Do you love spending time with him?
Does your heart skip a beat when you see him?
You have to think of how deep your relationship is to marry anyone.. If this is an internet love thing going on... goodness do not marry him until you get to know him in person! :)
2007-08-16 15:49:55 · answer #4 · answered by LyndasCa 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think there is anything wrong with an American marrying a Jamaican. I mean if African Americans can marry Americans then there is no problem. I mean I am not racistt and even if someone is racis and they don't think you are supposed to be together they are stupid. I think if they girl loves the guy and the girl loves the guy then it is perfectly fine.
2007-08-16 15:52:15 · answer #5 · answered by Tonya Powell 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you really love one another it does not matter where you are from. If you are having to ask other people their opinion you really need to think twice about it. You are probably not ready for that commitment. When it is the right person you will not have to ask anybody else what they think. You want even care what they think.
2007-08-16 15:54:55 · answer #6 · answered by Redhead 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The american girl marryng jamaican guy thing is fine. that is your business but if you are not sure he marrying you for you than dont do it.
2007-08-16 15:44:17 · answer #7 · answered by Jennifer H 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
awsome.. Im a White american man who married a Jamacian woman. just remember they are very hot headed people...lol
2007-08-16 15:55:17 · answer #8 · answered by Rob B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You just answered it yourself.Your not ready to marry to many questions unanswered.
2007-08-16 15:42:42 · answer #9 · answered by 45 auto 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're considering marrying him you should know in your heart if he truly loves you.
2007-08-16 15:40:32 · answer #10 · answered by mamabear 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋