extreme jealousy over ones bf/gf/spouse - examples : not wanting her/him to speak to a member of the opposite sex,getting jealous and angry if they remark someone else is attractive - even someone off of tv! always thinking she/he is "looking" at someone else,avoiding crowds/places because someone attractive may be there to turn their head..... things of that nature. what would make a person be that paranoid and jealous to the point of insanity? why would a person be that way,how can they change? and is that behavior "acceptable" in anyway ?
btw - no cheating etc caused the behavior .. the person is just like that,mentally jealous - if that makes sense.
also - i have thought it could be a low self esteem - give me your thoughts and elaborate on it.
thank you.
2007-08-16 09:25:23 · 13 answers · asked by ♥livingdeadgirl♥ 6 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
There can be several reasons:
1. low self-esteem
2. Feelings of insecurity
3. Abandonment
4.A fear of vulnerability : is the inability to let our guard down, to let another person know us completely
5. Emotional Imbalance
We are often afraid to trust because we are fearful of disappointment and hurt. Therefore, we go through extreme contortions to try to protect ourselves from the possibility of loss and pain. Yet, these attempts to protect ourselves may actually be the means with which we destroy that which we are trying to preserve. In other words, a woman may eventually destroy her marriage because she is too fearful to take the chance of trusting that her husband is faithful. As a result, she causes the loss and pain that she was trying to prevent.
In Essence:
When love can go and come without fear of meeting a watch-dog, jealousy will rarely take root because it will soon learn that where there are no locks and keys there is no place for suspicion and distrust, two elements upon which jealousy thrives and prospers.
Good Luck...
2007-08-16 09:42:24 · answer #1 · answered by mscute1lori 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You hit the nail on the head. It is absolutely low self esteem and insecurity. Unfortunately, there isn't a lot you can do to change that without lots of therapy, time, and patience. Someone that hard-wired has to have significant self issues, and is most likely never going to get completely over their jealousy.
2007-08-16 09:33:41 · answer #2 · answered by mrthing 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
This behaviour is generally caused by low self-esteem,
low self-worth and insecurity. Usually this person struggles to support themselves emotionally. This generally results in them behaving in the way you described, jellousy, paranoia etc. etc. If possible do not be in a relationship with this type of person and if you are, ask them to seek counselling. Otherwise you will not be with them for long as they will drive you away from them and generally make you reject them, like they do their own emotional self... There are underlying reasons for this type of behaviour which he/she needs to resolve......and no their behaviour is not acceptable or healthy for a relationship.
2007-08-16 09:56:33 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Insecurity-if the person is worried that their relationship is shaky, they could become jealous
The relationship beginning-How a relationship began can affect how the people respond to one another. For example, if the man was married or seeing someone else when the current relationship started, the woman might become suspicious that he will do the same to her that he did to his ex.
2007-08-16 09:34:38 · answer #4 · answered by The Apple Chick 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
People just don't get that way, they were like that from the beginning of the relationship and the other person thought it was sweet/cute/proves they loved them.
NOT!
Its a sickness in the head that needs counseling.
You never get involved with a person like that and you won't have to deal with it later.
2007-08-16 09:33:16 · answer #5 · answered by Tapestry6 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It is generally a learned behavior. They grow up observing others doing it, usually one or both parents, and they think that's the way to act. It is also a control issue.
2007-08-16 10:15:07 · answer #6 · answered by It's Complicated 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Unhealthy relationship at best, potentially dangerous at worst.
All the warning signs of potential stalker/abuser personality.
This could end badly, this is NOT "acceptable" behavior.
2007-08-16 10:00:58 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Fear they are going to lose the lover. Fear, low self esteem, and insecurity can make a lousy lovers of anyone.
2007-08-16 09:54:52 · answer #8 · answered by Steve C 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Low self esteem, or a guilty conscience!
2007-08-16 09:32:47 · answer #9 · answered by Alaskan Dragonfly 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Grow up. Why do you 'need' a constant protector like that? (it leads me to believe you have an under-developed, 'Daddy's Girl' personality, which attaches itself to psychos out of the sickest of needs for attention.)
2007-08-16 10:05:59 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋